


Define: Jealous

by cymyguy



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Heartache, M/M, Secret Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-11-17 02:51:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 50,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11266413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cymyguy/pseuds/cymyguy
Summary: Crushes are supposed to be fun, so Hinata must be doing it wrong.





	1. Define: Like

“Well if you can’t ignore him, you’ll just have to learn not to get mad when he yells at you,” said Yamaguchi.

“But he’s so mean! I have to defend myself, I can’t let Kageyama step on me like that. Someone has to remind him he’s not a king,” said Hinata.

“Maybe someone who’s a little less of a hothead should remind him.”

“Hmm…You’re right. How about you do it, Yamaguchi?”

“Well, I’m not very good at keeping my feelings from getting hurt—”

“I know, he hurts my feelings too! I swear if I could just—kick him right in the butt once—or squeeze his head really hard—”

They were distracted by a stampede of noisy girls.

“We saw him out the window!”

“Of course it’s him, who else could it be?”

“Come on hurry up, he’s probably past the second tree already.”

“Hurry, Kageyama’s here!”

Hinata leapt to his feet. “Kageyama?”

He ran after the group, abandoning Yamaguchi on the bench.

“Huh? Hinata—”

He followed a few steps behind the girls, until they stopped at the corner of the building and bunched up to peek. Hinata felt a flash of triumph as he flew by them, sprinting straight at the dark-haired boy. He skidded across his path, turned around and came back to his side.

“Hey Kageyama. You’re pretty late, was it a bad morning?”

“When is it ever a good morning?”

Hinata laughed.

“Do you have any food?” Kageyama said.

“Umm—” He dug around the bottom of his bag, and pulled out a protein bar. “Not sure how long it’s been in there. And it’s all smashed.”

“Do I look like I care?” He grabbed it.

The bell rang. Hinata took off running.

“Hope you get sick. Bye Kageyama.”

He smiled at the girls as he passed, but was going too fast to see any of their awed expressions. Unlike the girls, he was on speaking terms with the brooding heartthrob. Unlike the girls, he was in the same club as the tall-dark-handsome setter. Unlike the girls, he had lunch dates every week with ‘the black-haired boy who always keeps his hands in his pockets and frowns all the time, yeah, the gorgeous one’.

In only one way was he like all those girls; Hinata Shoyo had a big crush on Kageyama.

 

Practices had become even more a thing of bliss. He could watch Kageyama up close: his smooth movements and his muscles at work, his pretty pout in calm moments, and his swishing hair as he started and stopped. If anything, it was the opposite of a distraction; he found himself at full-capacity motivation. Practice was a prolonged high point.

“I swear you’re higher, Hinata, test it again,” said Yamaguchi.

Hinata ran toward the wall, leapt up, and grazed his fingertips just above his previous mark.

“I knew it.”

“Whoohoo, yeah!”

“I don’t see how someone’s vertical can improve by the day,” said Tsukishima. “It’s unnatural, like everything else about the Shrimp.”

“Maybe you guys should try being more weird,” Hinata said.

“Hmpf.”

The single chuckle came from Kageyama, and made Hinata’s heart speed up. He paused with his hands together in front of him, twisting them a little.

“Sho-chan, are you daydreaming?”

Nishinoya had hollered it from across the gym, and it caused everyone including Kageyama to look over at him.

“No. I forgot something, I was just trying to remember.”

“It better not be the thing I just told you,” said Kageyama.

“It’s not.”

“Then what did I just tell you?”

“Put a little bit more bounce in your last two steps, so that it slows you down just enough to make the block get ahead of you in timing, that way you’ll be hitting while the block’s already going down, with a few extra centimeters you’ll be able to hit it overtop to the open spot behind the block.”

Kageyama looked away before he nodded. Hinata smiled.

“Don’t smirk at me, go and do what I said.”

He might not be capable of perfect focus, but if he tried hard enough he could keep Kageyama from seeing his lapses. Lately he had been extra careful to be sharp around his setter, and he’d even forgotten the last time he was yelled at. For that reason.

 

Hinata, for once, was grateful for break time. He went into the clubroom, expecting to be alone so he could think. But Kinoshita was there, just changing into his practice clothes.

“Hi Kino-senpai, are you back from the doctor?”

“Hey Hinata. Yeah, everything’s fine with me.”

“Your heart’s okay?”

“Yep. Are you guys on break?”

“Yeah.”

Kinoshita caught the aimless look in his eyes.

“Is something up, Hinata?”

“Huh?”

“You seem a little off, am I right?”

“Uh—Um—Kinoshita-san. You have a girlfriend, right?”

“Yeah.”

“For a long time, right?”

“A few years now.”

“Could I—Could you maybe give me some advice?” Hinata said.

“Sure, I can try.”

Hinata looked at his feet. “I have someone I really like.”

“Kageyama. Right?”

Hinata leapt back and cried out.

“It’s okay Hinata—”

“How do you know, does everyone know, does Kageyama know, did you tell him?”

“No no, I didn’t tell him. Nobody knows but Ennoshita and I, I don’t think. Your senpais are watching out for you, is all.”

“Ah—Oh.”

“And Kageyama is the last person who would notice, don’t you think?”

Hinata almost laughed.

“So anyway, what’s the issue?”

“Well, I—I don’t know—what kind of—what kind of like it is. I don’t know if I want to date him, or if I just really like being his friend, or maybe if it mostly has to do with us being teammates and him being my setter. I don’t know what to do because—be—cause…”

“Because you don’t know what you _want_ to do.”

He nodded vigorously.

“Okay, then let’s figure out what’s going on for you.” Kinoshita went to his bag for paper and pencil. He sat next to a chair, using its seat as a desk. “Tell me some things you like about Kageyama.”

“Ooooooh, okay! I like how his eyes look.”

“Why is that?”

“Because they’re so dark blue, almost like ink. And they shine really brightly when he’s concentrating hard.”

Kinoshita scribbled. “Okay, what’s another thing you like?”

“His shoulders!” Hinata flexed his arms. “Because they can make him toss really fast and serve really hard.”

“Kay…”

“And I like when he sounds confident when he talks. Especially when he says my name like that.”

“I like how he looks out for us spikers when there’s a tough block. Even though he tends to freak out and try too hard.”

“I like his hair because it reminds me of a crow’s feathers. Like the color, and sort of how it moves, you know?”

Hinata chuckled. “I like how he sleeps in class.”

“You like that?”

“It’s the only time he can be around a big group of people and not be worried about being embarrassed or trying to look tough.”

“Ooo! And I really like how he wears all black and everything matches on the court, his hair, his uniform, and his shoes. It’s super cool and intimidating.”

“And and, I like all the cute faces he makes.”

“Like?”

“Like when we’re doing team spirit stuff and he thinks no one’s looking at him and his face is all pink and his mouth gets sort of twisted up like he’s almost smiling, ‘cause he’s happy.”

“Mm hm, I see.”

“Is that enough stuff? I have more!” Hinata said.

“This is enough. I can tell by this.”

“Tell what? What is it, Kino-senpai?”

“I think you definitely like Kageyama in a romantic, date him type of way.”

“Ohh, really?” He looked from Kinoshita to the list and back.

“Mm hm. You’re noticing lots of little things about him, because you watch him so closely, and that means you have more than the average interest in him. And an important point is that you mentioned things from school too, not just volleyball.”

“Oh, why is that important?”

“It means you don’t just like the way he plays volleyball. So you, being the volleyball psycho you are, don’t just admire his talent. And you know what else I think?”

“What, what?”

“You might even love him.”

“L—Love him?” His face splattered into a grimace.

“You mentioned liking when he’s happy and when he’s confident, which means you like seeing him at his best. When you love someone you always want them to be like that.”

“Hahaaaa, awesome! I didn’t know I could love Kageyama. Thank you Kinoshita-san, that makes me really excited.”

“Sure. So now that you know, you can figure out what to do.”

“Hmmm…”

Tanaka threw open the door. “Hey! What are you two doing in here, Captain’s starting without you.”

They ran out after him. In their rush they swept the paper off the chair, and it settled onto the floor in the corner of the room.

 

The next morning Hinata got to school earlier than usual. He spent the extra time wandering up and down the hall, thinking.

_I think…if I have the guts…the best thing would be to just tell him. He’ll only get it if I’m really clear and easy to understand. But if I tell him, and then he doesn’t like me anymore and thinks I’m weird, I would wreck everything for us being good friends and teammates. What if he refused to toss to me anymore? What if the rest of the team hated me because I made him mad and ruined our duo? But then…if I did tell him, and he did like me, at least a little bit, I’d be happy. Or even if I told him and he didn’t feel the same way, but he still wanted to be friends, I’d be happy then too, because at least he would know._

“Hinataaa, hi.”

He stopped. “Hi Yachi-san. Who’s this, your friend?”

“This is Akamine, from class three.”

“Akamine? I’ve heard your name. That’s Kageyama’s class.”

“Yeah.” The girl giggled.

“She—actually—She likes Kageyama,” said Yachi. “And she’s planning on talking to him today.”

“Oh—Ohhh. Ah—G-Good for you.”

“This is Hinata Shoyo. He’s Kageyama’s best friend, they’re in the volleyball club together.”

“Nice to meet you,” he said. “We’re not really best friends, Kageyama’s not the type to have a best friend.”

“Oh, I see. It’s nice to meet you, Hinata-kun.”

“Um, when are you—going to talk to him?”

“At lunch. We were just saying that the back courtyard’s probably best, because people rarely go there.”

“Lots of people go there to confess,” Hinata said.

“I guess it suits my purpose then,” she replied with a shy smile.

“Uh huh. Bye now Yachi-san, I have to go. See you at practice.”

“Bye Hinata.”

He rushed to the bathroom. The girl’s mention of Kageyama in that way had given him almost an immediate stomach ache. Hinata made sure that he was at the courtyard during lunch, seated behind a low stone wall. When Kageyama and the girl arrived, he was able to peek over and still keep his head hidden by some bushes. He had a clear view of Kageyama’s face as he stood in front of the girl.

“You probably don’t know me at all, but I’m in your class,” she said.

“I know you sit two in front of me in Lit,” said Kageyama.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, I do. I’m Akamine.”

Her name was poison to Hinata. He could see that Kageyama was watching with attentive but cold eyes. Rather than comfort him, however, Hinata started to get a little scared by it.

“Uh, well, you probably already know what’s coming, huh, since you’re a popular guy, and since I asked you to come out here when we’ve barely met.”

Kageyama said nothing. In spite of himself, Hinata wished he would make his face a bit more inviting.

“So, I—I like you a lot. I think you’re very good looking and—I think it’s funny when you sleep in class, because you look really—cute.”

Hinata almost gasped. _Me too, I think that too!_

“So, um, anyway, that’s that. And I—would like your phone number, so we could talk more. If that would be all right.”

She looked up, and Kageyama took his cue to speak.

“Sorry,” he said, not sounding sorry at all. “I don’t know if you’re cute or nice or anything, because I’ve never paid attention to you. Since I don’t know you at all I’m not interested in dating you. And I don’t have time right now to get to know you, with my club stuff going on. I’m sure you’ll be interested in someone else soon enough.”

Kageyama bowed and walked away.

Hinata for the moment could not spare a thought for himself. He felt he had just watched Kageyama slap the nice girl in the face. Hinata saw her shoulders starting to shake with tears, and the lump dropped from his throat to his stomach. He was about to go out to her, but the girl ran away.

_Holy…Why does Kageyama keep having people confess to him, if this is what it’s like?_

 

During free period Hinata went to see Yachi, hoping that Akamine would be with her again. She was. Her eyes were red. When she saw Hinata, her cheeks flamed.

“You have—a jerk for a friend,” she choked out, before burying her face in her sleeve.

“I’m really sorry,” Hinata said. He glanced at Yachi, who looked at him with pity. “I—I was listening, I heard what he said. Sorry for that, too.”

The girl didn’t reply. Hinata pulled up a chair next to them.

“Um, Akamine, about Kageyama.”

She straightened up, wiping her eyes. “I’m sorry, Hinata. I did the same thing to Yachi-kun, I shouldn’t have yelled at you guys, it’s not your fault.”

“I know what he said sounded really bad,” said Hinata. “But Kageyama—is—difficult. He can’t really talk to people in any other way than being completely honest and straightforward. He can’t read people’s feelings at all.”

“I know, Yachi told me too. But—why didn’t you guys warn me not to talk to him?”

“Well I didn’t know if he liked you or not. If Kageyama did like you it’d be really cool, he’s really loyal and thoughtful about things he likes—Oh, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t say that, I’m really sorry. But, um—”

Hinata reached for her hand. The girl’s hiccups stilled, and she looked him in the eyes.

“Kageyama didn’t mean to make it sound like you’re not cute or nice. He only meant what he literally said, that he doesn’t know if you are because he doesn’t know you. So—don’t be sad about that, if you were.” Hinata looked down. “You are actually really nice, and everyone says you’re the cutest girl in Class 3. Kageyama just—doesn’t notice much outside volleyball.”

He let go of her hand. Now it was her turn to take his.

“I see, Hinata-kun. I really didn’t mean to talk to you like I did. And I’m not mad at Kageyama now. I see.”

Hinata smiled when she did. He stood up to leave.

“And I’m going to talk to Kageyama. I never knew he was that bad with this sort of thing, and I know if he realized it he would want to fix it. So I’ll talk to him.”

“Oh, Hinata, could you—Would you mind mentioning me, if you do talk? Um, just to let him know I’m still—open to it.”

Hinata shook himself out of his stare.

“I’ll—Sure I will.”

 

After practice that night Hinata called Kageyama, waving him out of the clubroom.

“What?”

“I need to talk to you, please.”

He came out and shut the door. Hinata took a few steps away, just in case.

“I—I was at the back courtyard today when you got confessed to.”

Kageyama’s eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“I—just happened to be there during lunch. And, I don’t know if you realize this but—what you said to that girl sounded really mean.”

“Well I was just saying the—”

“I know I know.” Hinata looked at him. “I know it was the truth, and that part’s good, but the way you—worded it—was really really bad.”

“Why the hell is it your business?”

“I’m just trying to tell you! It sounded like you were saying she wasn’t cute and wasn’t nice. Yachi-san talked to her after, she said that’s what she took it as.”

“I—Oh.” He was looking Hinata directly in the face. The shorter looked away.

“I just thought you should know that. Because I don’t think you meant to be mean, just honest.”

“Well what should I say instead? What would you say?”

Hinata looked back up. “I—Well just leave that part out. Just say ‘I don’t know you very well, and I’m sorry, but I don’t have time to get to know you right now, because I have club.’”

“Oh. Okay.”

“And you should probably say something about how you appreciate that they’re interested in you. Because you do appreciate it, right?” Hinata eyed him.

“Well I’d rather they not be interested, if it means I have to do this all the time.”

“Well still, you should say you like being liked, or else they’ll think you’re proud.”

“If they thought that would they not want to confess anymore?”

“Kageyama don’t try to make yourself less likeable. Just say it with a little less brutal honesty. Honesty, but—um—kindness. If you have any of that.”

Kageyama scowled.

“And definitely don’t say the last part, about them liking someone else soon enough. Never say that.”

“Okay.”

Hinata grinned. “Okay, let’s go get our meat buns. I’ll still pay for yours, even though you’re a heartbreaker.”

“Shut up.”

 _Kageyama’s going to try_. _But it will take time for him to learn this. I can’t confess to him, because the only thing it would do is make me feel terrible. I don’t…ever…want to hear him say those things to me. So what should I do…_

_I guess I’ll just have to make him interested in me first. Kageyama’s never been asked out by someone he actually likes, apparently. So if I can get him to like me at least a little before I do it, then maybe…maybe it won’t end so badly._

_So what could I do to make him like me? I already have all the stuff I can flatter him with, about why I like him…What else do I need to lure him in? He likes volleyball, he likes curry…Does he like cute? He has to, everyone has someone they think is cute. I’ll just have to try to find out what Kageyama’s someone is like._

 

Hinata had no idea that Kageyama rehearsed his very own words over and over that night. He had no idea that Kageyama wrote them down, over and over, when he was supposed to be taking notes in class. He had no idea that Kageyama was making the effort to commit them to his poor memory.


	2. Define: Cute

Even though many girls, many mothers, and even some teammates had called him cute, Hinata had no experience with trying at it. So operation Cute For Kageyama required him to observe and copy what the girls at school did to enhance their cuteness. His first note was that they seemed currently obsessed with a certain brand of temporary tattoos, which came in tiny glittery shapes. Hinata asked Yachi where to get them. The next day at lunch he went to her classroom, where she applied the tattoos for him, with steady and smart hands. Hinata gave multiple hugs of thanks.

He showed up to the clubroom with tiny blue and orange stars at the corners of his eyes.

“Hey, Hinata, are those those tattoo things?” Yamaguchi said.

“Yeah, aren’t they super cool? Yachi-san did them for me.”

“Stars…Cool.”

“Cute cute, Hinata,” said Kinoshita.

“How refreshing to see you look so mature.”

“Shut it Tsukishima, you jealous bastard.” Tanaka patted Hinata’s head. “They sure are cute. If you were a girl we’d be all over it, wouldn’t we Noya-san?”

The libero gave a thumbs up.

Kageyama walked in. There was a chorus of hellos, but not from Hinata. He stood grinning at him, watching for the change in Kageyama’s face as he noticed the stars. But there was none. The setter moved away.

Phase one was a bust. Kageyama actually seemed to look away from him more than usual in practice. But Hinata felt no disappointment, only a stronger drive to find Kageyama’s weak point.

 

While walking by the gyms a few days later, he stopped to look in at the girls’ team practicing. The first thing he noticed were their shorts, with KARASUNO printed in white letters across the butt.

“Haaa! How cute!”

“Can we help you?” They were all looking at him.

“Uh—”

“Hey, it’s Hinata Shoyo, from the boys’ team.”

“Ahh, Hinata, number 10, the fast one!”

“Number 10, really? He’s really good!”

Hinata smiled, but flushed. One of the girls came up to him.

“Um, I—I was just watching…I really like your shorts,” he burst out.

“Oh, we just got them last week. Pretty cute, right?”

He nodded. “I really really like them. Would you—Do you have any extra pairs?”

“Sure, lots.”

“Could I—maybe…”

“You want to borrow some?”

“Yes. Yeah. Just for my practice, if that would be okay, if you don’t mind. I’m small, I won’t stretch them out. And I’ll wash them.”

“Sure, you can borrow some.”

“That’d be way cute!” one girl called.

“Super cute,” she agreed, smiling at him. “Come over here.”

Hinata arrived just on time for practice, with “Karasuno” on his butt, thinking that he might have better luck with Kageyama looking there. To his delight, the setter was right by the gym door when he walked in.

“Look Kageyama, aren’t these awesome?”

He jumped and spun around to show off his back side. Peeking over his shoulder, he watched for a reaction. The ball slipped out of Kageyama’s hands.

“Hinata, what are you wearing?” someone called.

The excitement took him over for a moment, and he ran off to show the rest of them. Kageyama was left to stare at the spot he had just been. He suddenly felt something hot running toward his mouth. He covered his face and ran outside.

“Kageyama, where—”

“Bathroom.”

It was the first nosebleed he had ever gotten, for that reason. But Hinata didn’t see it.

His next attempt came a weekend later. There was a huge new sports store opening in Tokyo, and the team had made plans to go and see it together. But several people canceled, and others lost interest, so instead of a van with Coach driving, Tanaka ended up hitching a ride with his sister, and only Ennoshita, Hinata, and Kageyama tagged along.

Hinata hustled into the middle seat, so that he had the best chance of being next to Kageyama when he showed up. He was wearing a black stocking cap with a little crow face on it. It had a fluffy ball on top, and the dangling yellow strings were shaped to look like bird feet. His mom had told him over and over how adorable it was, and he figured that he would at least score some points with Kageyama for the theme.

“Cool hat,” said Ennoshita, joining him in the back.

Tanaka launched himself into the passenger seat, and a few moments later Kageyama sat himself in the last spot in the back, next to a beaming Hinata.

“Look Kageyama, it’s a crow.”

He glanced. “I can’t tell.”

“Cause you didn’t look, dummy.”

Ennoshita, as the only one without experience, had the worst ride of the four.

Upon walking into the building, they realized a few hours wouldn’t be enough to see everything. Ennoshita chased Tanaka one way, and Hinata pulled Kageyama the other. There wasn’t room to run, so they speed walked to the volleyball section, where Kageyama froze stiff with saucer eyes, and Hinata let out a fit of high decibel shrieks that caused concern among onlookers.

They ran through the same eight aisles for over an hour, by the end of which both were sweating. Hinata took off his hat for the first time; he had forgotten the secret weapon hidden underneath. But Kageyama saw the two little pigtails at the bottom of his hair, sticking out above his neck.

Hinata didn’t remember them until he got home that night. Neither had he noted the fact that Kageyama seemed to lag behind more after he had taken off his hat.

 

The first school day following their trip was yet another eventful one for Kageyama. He was approached right away in the morning, while he stood in the hall. It was exactly the kind of confession he hated most: a surprise attack right out in the open, and in the earliest part of the day.

“Hi Kageyama.”

He turned slowly, fighting off the look of annoyance which had immediately started to take over his face.

“I’m Kutara Nanako, I’m a second year, class five. I just want to say that I’ve had a crush on you for a while now, and I’d like to go out some time, if you wanted to.”

Kageyama normally had his response ready by the time they had finished, but he paused now, recalling the words he had memorized _. What was it again, what was it…First I should:_

“Well, uh—I don’t know you.”

“No, that’s true, but that doesn’t mean we couldn’t get to know each other, right?” she said.

“Well, I have club, so I don’t think—I have time for that—right now.”

She looked down.

“Sorry,” he hurried. “I—I appreciate it, that you like me. It makes me—Um—I’m sorry that it won’t work.”

“Oh no, that’s okay. I see why it wouldn’t. Thank you for being so cool about it.”

Kageyama stared. “Uh—”

“And good luck with your club.”

“Thanks.”

She ventured a smile as she left. “Bye bye.”

Hinata had seen the two of them from down the hall. She was gone by the time he got there.

“Who were you talking to, Kageyama? Do you like her? Is she cute?”

“She asked me out.”

“Whaaa, again? Who knew you’d be so popular your second year.”

He tried to elbow him playfully, but his arm shot out a little sharp. Kageyama growled and shoved him.

“So what’d you say?”

“What you told me to.”

“You rejected her?”

“Yeah. She said thanks for being so cool about it.”

“Wow, she really said that? That’s great Kageyama, good job. You must improve quickly.”

“Of course I do.”

Hinata chuckled, as his squirming insides now bathed in relief. But it was an odd kind of relief. Kageyama’s continued rejection of every cute girl who approached him was keeping Hinata from despair. Yet, it was also keeping him from plucking up the courage to confess in his own turn.

_Kageyama doesn’t seem interested in that stuff. At all. He doesn’t want it interfering with his life, I guess. Definitely not with club. But I think maybe…Maybe if he dated me, it’d be different, because I’m in the club too. So it wouldn’t be as much work. But…I don’t know if I could convince him of that._

_And I’m too scared to try._


	3. Define: Guy

He did not know if he had failed to be cute, or if Kageyama was just immune, but either way his first plan had not worked. That night, with the latest confession on his mind, Hinata decided he should get moving on another approach.

_Guys want cute girls, but what does a guy want in another guy? It’s probably different…Does Kageyama want another guy to be tough? Or does he want someone more sensitive like a girl would probably be? Does he want someone who always dresses nice and combs his hair and smells good? But Kageyama doesn’t do any of that. Well his hair’s always nice, but…What’s so great about us guys anyway? What do they even like about us? What do girls like about guys?_

He decided it was not a question for him to answer. And the next day he happened to find Yachi with a large group of girlfriends at lunch. It was a jackpot.

“What do girls like about guys?” she repeated.

“Well that depends,” said a friend. “Are you asking because you’re trying to get a girl? Or are you asking because you’re questioning the expectations of your own gender?”

“Umm, I’m asking for a friend. And he’s trying to get a guy, actually.”

“Oh, what friend?” Yachi said.

“My friend Koji from middle school. So, if all of you like guys, why do you like them?”

“Well I think the answer will be different from everyone, Hinata.”

“Well there are some basic rules,” one girl said.

“Oo, what are the rules?” he asked.

“I would say most girls like muscular guys rather than really skinny guys. But not too muscular.”

_Well that’s not a problem the one way, but the other…_

“That’s sort of just to get back at guys for liking big boobs and butts but not someone too fat.”

“Oh, I see. Um, sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize for hundreds of generations of your own gender.”

“Also,” said another, “All girls like good hygiene. At the very least, decent hygiene.”

_I’m pretty good at that. At least, I think I am…_

“We like the smell of guys, like of your deodorant and stuff, mostly I think because it’s different from our smell.”

_Hmm, but Kageyama and I have the same smell._

“Okay, what else?”

“Um, Hinata,” said Yachi, “I think—You should remember that the most important thing is how you treat the person. Isn’t that the first reason that you like someone, because they do or say something nice to you?”

“So then, what kind of stuff do you like guys to do?”

“Gifts,” said one. “Not gifts just to get things. Thoughtful gifts, like my favorite kind of flower on a day when I’m going to have a hard test.”

“Chocolate after a bad day.”

“Chocolate after any day.”

“Everyone likes having doors opened for them,” said one girl, “But if a guy makes an obvious effort where he didn’t have to, that’s nice.”

“Doors?”

“And carrying things for you,” someone added.

“I see,” said Hinata. “Are there any things that you like about guys that a girl can’t do?”

“Um excuse me, did you just say what I think you said?”

“Oh, um, I meant, is there anything guys have, or anything about them, that you think is cool or—fun?”

They burst into giggles at this, but Yachi still answered seriously.

“I think, for girls who are attracted to guys, we find their differences interesting. Like, your chests are different from ours. And your legs are different. Those are things I notice, anyway…”

“Yachi-kun’s right. I like a good thigh, myself.”

“I like strong shoulders.”

“Those bulging back muscles that the swimming guys have, oh my gosh.”

 _That sounds great_ , Hinata thought, _but the person you’re describing is Kageyama, not me_.

“So you like how guys look, and how they smell, and if they do nice things for you? Do you like how they eat, or talk—”

“Ew, no, I do not like how most guys eat. And as for _how much_ you can eat, we don’t find that nearly as impressive as guys do.”

“Oh.”

“When guys show off to hide that they’re nervous, it is so annoying. Why can’t they just be honestly nervous like girls are, and not be ashamed of it?”

“Guys are ashamed of way too much stuff. Like crying, what’s the big deal about that? They’re allowed to cry over their club teams but not over failing a test?”

“And they can’t be ‘too nice.’ I’ve never met a single person who was actually, genuinely too nice.”

“And they like to tell themselves they have natural advantages over girls, but I think they just want to believe they’re born better, so that they don’t have to do any work to actually be better.”

“Yeah!”

They had forgotten about Hinata. He smiled at Yachi.

“Thank you, Yachi-san. See you at practice, have a good rest of the day.”

“Bye Hinata-kun, you too.”

He went away with a good list of things to try, and decided to simply observe whether they were hits or misses with his setter. When he met up with Kageyama and they went toward the clubroom together, Hinata tried to jog ahead to get to the door first. But this made Kageyama think they were in a race, so he blew past Hinata and beat him there. Ennoshita was the only one inside, so Hinata tried again.

“I washed my kneepads yesterday, twice. Do they smell better?”

“Get—away from me—dumbass.”

Kageyama forced him back. Hinata took a minute to think.

“Hey Kageyama, have you ever tried this stuff?” He held up his stick of deodorant. “It’s really good, here smell.”

He raised his arms and came toward him.

“Get off me, Hinata, what the hell is wrong with you.”

Hinata pouted. Hygiene was his strongest point, and it had failed. He would have to come up with a real plan, and start again tomorrow.

 

Hinata got up early, and groomed himself more carefully. As he stood in front of the bathroom mirror in his underwear, he couldn’t help noting his small arms and legs. _I’ve tried to fix it, I work my hardest to get stronger, but I just don’t get bigger, I can’t help that. But…Kageyama doesn’t really care, I don’t think. He doesn’t care that I’m short, right? He still tosses to me. So that means he only cares about what my body can do. As long as I can jump high and hit hard, it doesn’t matter to him_. He nodded at his reflection and marched out.

Hinata stopped by Coach’s store before school to pick up a fresh curry bun. Then he met Yachi under the cherry tree in front of the school.

“Hey, Hinata-kun. I brought a few different kinds, you can pick which one you like.”

“Ooo.”

She held out three different spray bottles of perfume.

“Ah! Cupcakes! Does it really smell like that?”

“Yeah, that’s a good one, it’s very vanilla and—warm, sort of.”

“I’ll try that one.”

“Okay, here you go.” She spritzed him. “I’ll see you later, then.”

“Thanks Yachi-san, bye.”

He waited there until he saw Kageyama going up to the school doors. He waved him down.

“Kageyama! Look—what I have—for you.”

His last bounce landed him right in front of the taller boy. He held out the paper bag.

“I remembered you have that history test today, so I brought you a curry bun. To make you feel better. Or, I mean, for good luck. Or—Here you go.”

“What? No.”

“Wha—Why not?”

“Why would you give me that?”

“I just said, Bakeyama.”

“Did you make it and get sick off it so you’re giving it to me?”

“No!”

“You got it out of the trash, didn’t you.”

“No! Just shut up and take it, Kageyama, geez.”

“I don’t want it.”

Hinata hopped in front to stop him. “Oh yes you do, Kageyama-kun.” He opened the bag and swirled it under his nose. “Hmm? Your favorite, faaavorite smell, hmm?”

He took the bag. “I’ll have it after practice, just in case it does make me sick.”

“But—It’s for now. I was gonna buy you more after practice.”

“Why? Did you parents give you a bunch of money or something?” His face faltered the slightest bit. “Was it your birthday?”

“How many times have I told you my birthday’s in the summer.”

Kageyama turned toward the school, and Hinata followed.

“I know it’s a thing with you, but you should trust more,” he said.

“Is that you who smells like that?” said Kageyama.

“Like what?”

“Like…frosting, or something. It is your birthday.”

“It’s not!”

He inhaled deeply. “It’s definitely you.”

Hinata looked carefully at his scowl. “Nope, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He walked away.

 

At lunch Hinata skipped down the hall, peaking into the Class 3 rooms.

“Ha!” He stood in the doorway pointing. “I found you, Kageyama.”

“I wasn’t hiding, idiot.”

Hinata pulled a chair up to the desk and began unpacking his lunch.

“How was the test, Kageyama?”

“I didn’t get over fifty. I might’ve failed it.”

“Oh. Don’t mind don’t mind, everyone fails. But, if you want to cry, it’s okay. I won’t make fun of you. Or tell anyone.”

Kageyama stared.

“Seriously, I won’t laugh or anything. Guys can cry about tests too, is what I think.”

Kageyama returned to his food.

“I see, you don’t feel like crying. But you do feel bad, probably. Have some chocolate, that’ll help.”

He pulled a bar out of his pocket and set it between them.

“Is that what that smell is?” Kageyama said.

“Probably.” He watched him for a bit, relearning all the details of his too pretty face. “Did you eat your bun?”

“Yeah.”

Hinata smiled to himself. Kageyama saw, and slammed his hand on the desk.

“I knew it! What did you do?”

“Nothing!”

“You poisoned me, dammit.”

“I didn’t do anything, I bought it from Coach! I swear I swear I swear, Kageyama.”

“Well, it didn’t work anyway, if you did do something.”

Hinata sighed. _Well he ate it, and he’s eating the chocolate, but he’s sure not happy about it. I can’t tell if he actually likes the spray stuff or not. At least he noticed. Why is he so suspicious about me being nice to him?_

He thought back to the thing with the hose last summer, to a few mostly harmless training camp pranks, and some midnight phone calls he had tried and failed to scare Kageyama with. He sighed again. _Life was easier when I didn’t like him so much_.

“What’s your problem?” said Kageyama.

“Nothing. Gimme some chocolate.”

 

In the clubroom the cupcake smell invaded immediately. Kageyama ratted on him, so Hinata had to think up a fast lie.

“Oh, well, I—was just giving Yachi-san a hug, maybe her smell got on me.”

“You lucky bastard,” said Tanaka.

“Just how much have you been hugging her today?” Kageyama asked him.

“Once in the morning, and then before lunch, and then just now. But it’s fine, Yachi-san smells good, right?”

“Why are you hugging her so much?”

“I just do it when I feel like it.”

“Is it really not your birthday?”

Hinata looked at him. “You are so stupid.”

The hit to his ribs didn’t faze him, because he was already starting to focus on using his small body to its limits. He looked exceptionally well in practice, so well that Kageyama requested to stay after and work with him, while he was in such good form. Ennoshita left the key and the responsibility of locking up to the setter. Hinata was pleased. One part of the plan had finally worked, although it was the part he had already known would get a response.

Afterwards, Hinata hurried to change. Then he walked to the door and held it open as he waited for the other boy to finish. Kageyama was about to praise him.

“You were—” He saw Hinata standing at the door. “What are you doing?”

“Holding the door, dummy.”

“You’re the dummy, it’s cold out. So close it behind you and go home.”

“No.”

Kageyama glared. “Hey. What’s wrong with you? What’s with all the weird stuff today? Did you hit your head? Or are you trying to get in my face and piss me off? You wanna fight, is that it?”

Hinata bit down hard on his lip. His hand clenched on the door handle.

“You’re the only idiot who would think someone being nice means they want to fight.”

He stormed out.

 

Kageyama was half way home when he realized he hadn’t locked up like he promised. Hinata had distracted him. So he grumbled all the way back. Not wanting to be blamed for anything out of place, he did a scan of the room. There was one loose piece of paper in a corner. He picked it up, and almost dropped it again. The top of the page said “Kageyama: What You Like”.

“Wha—Huh?”

As he read down the list, his frown deepened. By the end he had a slight red in his cheeks. The handwriting was Kinoshita’s. But he had a girlfriend, so why would he make a list of such embarrassing and suggestive things about Kageyama? His eyes scanned the page again, but he was thinking more than reading.

Kageyama’s birthday was coming up. It was the only reason he could think of that a list like this would be made about him. _The team must have thought of it, and Kinoshita wrote stuff down_ , he concluded. But he was not at all certain, and on top of everything else that day, the thing weirded him out.

Suddenly embarrassed about still having the list in his hand, Kageyama crumpled it up and tossed it back onto the floor. He turned to go. But then he swooped down and picked up the ball of paper, and pushed it into his pocket.


	4. Define: Queen Bee

Hinata had taken it upon himself to make a lunch date with Kageyama. In spite of that, the setter seemed unusually cooperative today.

“Have you had anyone ask you out lately?” Hinata said.

“No. Have you?”

“Pfff, no.”

“What are you laughing for? I bet you were that kid in primary school who had like six girlfriends, and took turns dating them all at recess.”

Hinata laughed sincerely. “What the heck are you talking about, Kageyama?”

He slurped his milk.

“So life’s pretty good then, huh Kageyama? Or would you rather have some exciting confessions and stuff going on?”

“No.”

“How are your parents?”

“Fine.”

“It’s almost your birthday. Do you wanna turn 16?”

“What’s the big deal?”

“Well it’s supposed to be sweet 16. Maybe you’ll get sweeter. I did.”

He attempted his prettiest smile and batted his lashes. Kageyama grabbed his face and shoved him backwards.

“If you did get sweeter you’d never be left alone at school, like ever. Apparently even the sucky personality you have now doesn’t work to keep people away.”

“Sure doesn’t work on you,” Kageyama said. “If I do get any better you’ll be following me home to have breakfast and dinner together too.”

He giggled hard. Kageyama put his chin in his hand and looked out the window.

“Is it actually annoying to have all those girls liking you?” Hinata said.

“Yes it’s annoying.”

“No I mean really. It bothers you that they like you?”

“Yes.”

“You’re messed up, Kageyama.”

“Shut up. It’s not the fact that they like me, it’s how they act when they’re around me and talking about me and stuff.”

“Like, being excited and talking in high voices? And screaming sometimes? And blushing and following you around and calling you embarrassing things?”

“Yes, all that.”

“Well I act like that.”

Kageyama looked at him.

“Am I annoying?”

“Of course you are. But that’s just you, you’re excited and loud and—happy about stuff, but all the time, not just about one stupid thing.”

“Well how can I be your friend if you think I’m annoying?” Hinata was meeting his eyes, even challenging them. “Don’t you want to like me? Don’t you want me to change?”

“Why should you? You don’t care what I think, and I don’t care what you think.” Kageyama looked away. “Besides, you’re not the one assaulting me at school, or sticking notes in my bag, or trying to walk in front of me in the hall so I’ll look at your butt.”

Hinata laughed again. “I do too attack you at school! And I’ve given you notes before. I haven’t done the butt thing, but.”

“Hey, you did do the butt thing. You wore those girls’ shorts to practice that one time.”

“I wore them ‘cause they were cute! Not ‘cause I wanted you guys to look.”

“What’s the point of having a cute butt if no one looks at it?”

“Shut up Kageyama,” he laughed, “We’re still in school.”

“What’s the matter with you this week? You haven’t brought me food once.”

“Well I have to save up my niceness, for your birthday.”

Kageyama frowned. “Who else knows about my birthday? You haven’t been telling people, have you?”

“Yeah, I have.”

“Who?”

He smiled. “Anyone who asks.”

“You—”

The bell rang and Hinata bounded to the door.

“You better hope you’re out of the clubroom by the time I get there,” Kageyama said.

“I always am, I’m way faster.” He scampered off.

 

On Tuesday morning Hinata greeted Yachi in the hall with a big wave.

“Heeeey, Yachi-san, how are you? Did you have a good morning? Did you sleep good last night?”

“H-Hey Hinata. Um, it’s an okay morning, I guess.”

“Just okay?”

“How is your morning?”

“Really good.”

“Ah. So…D-Did you hear?”

He cocked his head.

“About the girl who wants to go out with Kageyama?” she said.

“Who? What girl? Who is she, Yach-san, do you know her? What year is she, what color’s her hair?”

“She’s, um, blond…A third year…” Yachi turned. “She’s up there.”

He immediately stood on his tiptoes.

“The one in the middle.”

“Hm?”

“Um—With the—big chest?”

“What?” he gasped. “Her?”

His chest froze, strangling his last breath.

Long sleek hair. Plush lips, perfect flashing teeth. Chest curving one way. Butt curving the other. Skirt hemmed short. Black nails running across thick thighs.

Hinata’s neck was hot, and not for the same reason other people’s were. He felt for a moment like he was collapsing from heat stroke.

“It’s Makota Ebisu,” said Yachi. “Her father owns a software company, his name’s really famous in the business world. The last person she dated was the captain of the girls’ soccer club, who’s been modeling since she was 12.”

Hinata grabbed Yachi’s arm.

“Come on.”

They hurried up to the closest classroom door, pressing their backs to it and keeping out of sight. The girl was surrounded by others, but one voice was speaking louder than the rest, and it was easy to tell it belonged to her.

“Well you don’t start to look out for someone until you hear about them. I didn’t choose to notice until everyone started talking about how good he was.”

“So you heard he was hot before you noticed he was?”

“No, only an idiot goes by what other people say about looks. Everyone has a different taste, so why should I value their judgement? No, I heard about his club, and then Karasuno went to Nationals, and it was obvious from the stands he was the best looking guy in the gym.”

“Some people say he’s kind of a moron, though. Gets bad grades.”

“What do I care? He’s going pro in his sport. I’ll be watching him play for Japan in the Olympics, for gods sake.”

“He’s selfish,” a girl put in. “Wouldn’t it be hard to date a person like that? They used to call him the King.”

“Then the only person who can get him wrapped around her arm is a queen. If I have the ambition for it, there’s no reason I shouldn’t have him.”

“Talk about eye candy,” someone giggled.

“I don’t do eye candy. It’s like, does this skirt wear me, or do I wear this skirt? It doesn’t look its best until I start owning it.”

The bell rang. The group dispersed, and students came flooding through the door where Yachi and Hinata stood. He was staring into space, and she was watching him with concern.

“H-Hinata-kun…” Then she sighed. “She’s so confident…”

“I don’t—like—her.”

His fists were clenched at his sides, and he glared at the feet of those passing by.

“I—I’ve heard people say she’s not very nice,” said Yachi. “But she’s probably been dated the most out of anyone in our school.”

_What the…I thought Kageyama was a piece of work, she’s way worse than he ever was! Talking about him like he’s just talented and good looking and that’s all that matters._

“Hinata.”

_All she wants is to have Kageyama, she doesn’t want to treat him special or make him happy or anything. She just likes his looks and his fame, she doesn’t even know anything about him…I like those things too, but you can’t just take them like that, you should be proud and admire him and—and—_

“Hinata.” Yachi was tugging on his arm. “We have to get to class.”

“Oh. Yeah. Bye Yachi-san.”

“Bye Hinata…”

 

He couldn’t stop thinking about it. By lunch he had obsessed himself into a headache and stomach ache, and was resolved to lay his head on his desk for the whole of break. But only a few minutes into his timeout, someone was rapping their knuckles hard on the desktop.

“Gah! Wha—What do _you_ want?”

It was Makota Ebisu.

“You’re awfully sweet,” she sneered.

He was angry and half afraid, not in a fit state for direct contact with her.

“I’m told there’s a little redhead who follows the stud setter around like a puppy. I’m assuming that’s you.”

“Ah! Wh-What did you say?”

“Keep your pants on, shorty, I just want your friend. Honestly it’s been about four hours since word started going around, I thought he’d have come running by now. But he’s not into the social scene here, is he?”

“A—He has—the team—”

“Here.” She pulled out her phone and unlocked it. “Just put in the number and make this real easy for him.”

She held out her phone. Hinata only looked hard at her, as under the desk he squeezed his hands between his legs.

“Are you slow?” she said.

Silence.

“Have you taken a good look at me, shrimp? Who are you to—”

“You shouldn’t call people ‘shrimp’ when you want them to give you something,” he said.

She almost rolled her eyes. “Kay, I didn’t come down here to have a chit-chat with a cute elementary kid. So put in the number, and you’ll get to watch me walk out of here and become the star of your wet dreams.”

Hinata couldn’t hide his surprise at her speaking that way. _She’s a girl…An older girl…_ Finally he brought out his hands, allowing her to set the phone in his palms. He held it up.

Contact Name: Tobio

His hands clenched on the device. It was all he could do to keep the ‘what!’ in his head from going out his mouth. _How can she…Who does she think she…How dare she._

Hinata’s eyes flashed up for an instant as he began to press numbers. Makota was drumming polished fingers slowly on the desk. He felt a single thrilling twinge at the thought that he was one of the few people who had Kageyama’s number.

He handed the phone back to her, eyes down. He had put in his own digits. Makota turned and walked out, leaving Hinata to boil in nasty thoughts instead of resting his pounding head.

 

During practice he couldn’t afford to give thought to it, but on the trip home it started again. He ate his dinner in a two-minute flurry and shut himself in his room.

_Dammit, dammit…Just forget about her. If Kageyama dates her, so what? Let him have a mean brat like her, she’s perfect for a king…I don’t care at all what he does, it’s not my problem. If he wants to spend all his extra time on her then I’ll be better than him in no time. And I want to be better than him, so there, I don’t care._

_Uhhh…Now I’m lying to myself too, not just to Kageyama. How come it’s so hard to figure out what to do? How come I can’t…do this?_

His phone buzzed. Hinata had to hunt around for it, finally pulling it out from under his bed. There was a text, from an unknown number.

_It’s…It’s her!_

Makota Ebisu: Hey

_Craaaaap what do I do what do I do—_

M: I’m sure by now you know who this is

M: I’m ready to hear what you want

_She thinks I’m Kageyama, so…I’ll just—be Kageyama._

_No I can’t, that’s even more of a lie._

_But…_

_I’ll just pretend to be him and see what she says. Kageyama’s a horrible texter, after all, anyone would start to dislike him after reading his messages._

Hinata: Want what

H: Idk who this is

M: They were right u really r an idiot

_What a—Mean!!!_

M: Ha jk

M: So what’s a muscley volleyballer wear to bed, some pretty short shorts?

M: Or maybe

M: No shorts at all

_What the…She’s super creepy, what the heck…That’s so—Uhhhh, I really don’t—like—_

H: ?

H: R u wanting to date me

M: If you’re wanting to date me, I’m willing to allow it

H: Who is this

M: I don’t like games like that

M: I’m honest to a fault and I’ve heard you are too

_She uses lots of punctuation marks. Oo, I forgot, Kageyama always makes a bunch of spelling errors._

H: Gess so

M: I usually don’t send pics the first conversation but if you give me something to work with I might get in the mood

_WHAT THE HECK IS WITH HER!_

H: I still dk who u r

M: Makota Ebisu u jerk

H: O

M: Didn’t the shrimpy redhead warn u about me?

_That’s it! You wanna talk to the real Kageyama, I’ll give you the real Kageyama._

H: I never met u so idk if ur cute or nice and id have time to find out cuz i have club and its importan and im sure ull like someone else soon

_Ha. What do you think of that?_

M: If you’re the joking type I honestly don’t know if I can do this.

H: K bye

M: Um ok I know that guys are idiots and think being rude is cute, but I’m seriously not into it

M: And if you’re trying to get me right now, I can and will absolutely humiliate you in front of the only friends you have

M: There’s a lot of games you don’t want to play with me

H: K i wont

There was no response. Hinata had felt a horrible gleam of fun while doing it, but as the minutes dragged on he felt worse and worse.

_This sucks. I don’t want Kageyama to date her! She’s like the worst. But—I’m the worst for lying like this. I don’t want him to like her, but if he does and she likes him then shouldn’t I just let them—do whatever they’re gonna do?_

_This is being mean to Kageyama…But I said I wanted him to be happy, and I want to be nice to him, and this isn’t good for him it’s only good for me. I can’t do that…_

_But she’s the worst! Saying all that stuff about him, calling him T—…She probably wanted to send nudy pictures to—Ahhh!_ He threw his phone across the room _. I don’t wanna get nudy pictures! I have to stop this right now, I can’t pretend to be Kageyama it’s wrong and doesn’t make me feel good. I won’t answer her anymore, no matter how much she texts me. And if Kageyama wants her number, then I’ll…_

His phone rang. Hinata cried out in fright, jumping away rather than toward it. He inched across his room and picked it up. The caller was Kageyama.

_Ahhh, it’s like he knew! My best friend knows I feel bad and he wants to cheer me up! I don’t think Kageyama has a clue about stuff like that actually, but it worked out that way so it’s like he knew!_

_But wait, what if she somehow talked to him, and now he’s calling me because he’s mad that I impersonated him? What should I—_

The ringing stopped.

“Ah!”

He called back.

“What’s the idea, dumbass?”

“Hey Kageyama, what’s up?”

“Did you watch it?”

“Huh?”

“The documentary—”

“Oh crap, crap! I forgot.”

“You idiot! I told you at morning practice, I told you at free period, and I told you again before you went home.”

“I know I know I’m sorry, I really was listening I did hear you and I really did wanna watch but when I got home I got distracted and totally forgot about it, I’m really sorry. Really.”

“Dammit you. Well shut up and open your ears, because I’m gonna have to tell you everything.”

“Really? Right now?”

“Yes now, I’ll forget half of it by tomorrow. So pay attention.”

“Okay, you got it.”

After a day of head hurting and mind turning, listening to Kageyama talk about volleyball was better than his favorite music. But all the being angry had tired him out, so even though it was only ten, his head sagged deeper and deeper into the pillow, and Kageyama’s voice got more and more distant.

“—but he didn’t want to give up, even though it was his fifth surgery, and I get that, I’d be the same way. You too, probably.”

No response.

“Hinata.”

He listened harder, and after a moment could hear the sound of light breathing.

“Hey—Dumbass…”

It was the easiest sound in the world. Kageyama immediately felt like lying down. He wondered why Hinata had fallen asleep so early. _Well at least he’ll be rested for tomorrow’s practice match_. Kageyama pulled the phone a little closer to his ear, and listened a few more seconds. Then he ended the call.


	5. Define: Rejected

The next day Hinata was walking the halls with his setter before school.

“I told you,” said Kageyama, “The last part was him in the gym watching the practice.”

“Nooo, but what was the last thing he said? What were the last words of the documentary?”

“What does it matter?”

“Because the last words are the coolest, they’re the most important. Usually they’re good advice about something.”

“I don’t remember. I recorded it, we’ll watch it again sometime.”

“Yeah! I wanna see him kick those kids’ butts.”

“I gotta take a dump.”

He made for the bathroom up ahead. Hinata was about to laugh at him, but there was some commotion in the crowded hall, and his ear was always attuned to commotion.

“What’s that?”

The answer came plowing through the crowd, with red hot lipstick and a not very nice smile on her face.

“Hello you.”

Hinata squawked. He shoved Kageyama toward the bathroom.

“Okay sure, take your time, don’t rush.”

He jerked open the door and pushed Kageyama inside, closing it again before the boy could give him a look. Makota was right in front of him now, and he squared his shoulders to her, adopting a guardian position.

“Hiding in the bathroom?” she said. “That’s really mature, that makes me so attracted.”

“He’s not hiding,” said Hinata.

“Unfortunately you can’t scare me with the ‘men’s’ room, I’ve been making out here since first year. Away, shrimpy.”

“No way. Who would like someone walking in on them when they’re using the toilet?”

“Uh huh, I’m sure he’s real busy in there. I’m sure he told you how hilarious he was being over the phone last night, and now that we’re face to face he’s scared of me, just like I thought, and just like he should be. But trying to be cute like that isn’t gonna put me off, so you go in and tell your hero to come out and have a talk, mkay?”

“I—He’s not—No.”

Kageyama was reaching for the door when it rattled sharply.

Hinata found himself shoved up against the bathroom, with polished nails squeezing either side of his collar.

“Do you think I’m playing around?” she said through her teeth.

 _She’s strong…And so beautiful_.

He scowled. Then Makota smiled, and it was horrible up close. Hinata’s spine shivered.

“I see. I have to get past the guard dog. No problem.”

She walked off.

Kageyama came out.

“What the hell are you doing out here?”

“N-Nothing. Nothing.” His swiveled, checking and rechecking whether she had seen him. Kageyama grabbed his head to stop it.

“Were you talking to someone?”

“No.”

“Then why are you still here?” Kageyama said.

“Um—Okay, I was talking to someone. A girl. Who likes you.”

“Why?”

“Well she—It’s a girl who’s already asked you out. Uh, apparently. She didn’t take it very well that you—you know, so she wanted to get into the bathroom and come after you.”

“Were you pushing her against the door? I heard noise.”

“No no, that was—That was actually me getting pushed into the door.”

“Did she honestly think she could get me to like her more by shoving my teammates around?”

“Oh. Ha ha. Yeah, she was mad, I don’t think she thought it through.”

Kageyama shoved him. “She shouldn’t pick on the weakling, either.”

“Hey! You bend over and I’ll—”

“Hinata-kun” said a passing teacher, “Aren’t you supposed to be in my class by now?”

“Ah, yes Sensei.” He punched Kageyama in the gut and ran off. “Don’t be late for the bus.”

 

As they were getting on the bus after the practice match, Hinata pulled out his phone.

“Wah!”

He had thirty-six messages from Makota. He and Kageyama got into their seat, and Hinata turned away from him to hide the screen.

M: His lawyer will absolutely have your guts!

M: And your asshole isn’t gonna be safe in prison let me tell you

M: They’ll be all over a wimp like you, and by the time you come back out you won’t have an ass, a dick, or that pretty face!

_What the heck!!! I didn’t even—What’s her—Geez!_

M: And you think you’ll be fine and dandy once you get out, but getting out’s just the beginning, because then you’re going to have to deal with ME.

_She’s saying this stuff to Kageyama! That’s terrible! I’m glad I’m getting them and not him. She’s the worst!_

The messages continued. His phone was shaking his hand with vibrations.

“What’s going on?” said Kageyama.

“Huh? With what?”

“Your phone. Is your mom freaking out or something?”

“Oh. Oh no, it’s not that. This girl I don’t know keeps texting me.”

“If you don’t know who she is how do you know it’s a girl?”

“Well, it’s—I can tell.”

Hinata had typed “will u plz stop” into the bar, but deleted it when he remembered that Kageyama wouldn’t say “please.” He was about to start again when the phone was swiped from his hand.

“Hey!”

“What’s with the emergency back here?” said Tanaka. “Sounds like a big fuss, but don’t worry, you’re senpai’s here.”

He held up Hinata’s phone and squinted at the screen.

“Woah…Woah woah, who the hell are you talking to, Hinata?”

“I’m not talking to them, they’re talking to me, I haven’t answered any of them!”

“This person’s seriously pissed off at you—Wait, is this a chick?”

“It’s a girl,” Kageyama confirmed. Hinata turned to hit him, but froze when he saw Nishinoya now reading over Tanaka’s shoulder.

“Wha…What the…Who is this? Shoyo would never do anything so bad it would make someone say such nasty things.”

“Another one?” Tanaka said. “She doesn’t stop, and he hasn’t even replied—Oo.”

They ooed together over the next message, and even louder over the next.

“What is it?” Hinata tried to crawl over the seat. “What’s it say?”

Tanaka tilted the screen, and the three of them stared with wide eyes. Then another message came in, with a tone completely different than that of the others.

M: Are you coming back to the clubroom after your match?

M: Maybe I’ll be there...waiting for you.

M: Maybe I’ll wear something nice

There was a blast of howling laughter from the two third years, and wailing cries for mercy from Hinata.

“Shoyo, you dog, this girl’s totally desperate for you!” said Nishinoya.

“What is it?” Narita came up behind him.

“Hinata’s babe, look at this.” Tanaka held the phone out of the redhead’s reach.

“You guys are too loud.”

“What’s going on?”

“What’s Hinata doing?”

“She’s typing again!” said Tanaka.

Now Yamaguchi, Kageyama, and all the first years were gathered around, watching for the next message. Hinata was half hiding in his shirt, and digging his nails into Tanaka’s leg.

M: Maybe I’ll wear something nice underneath, too.

A chorus of ‘ohhhhhhhhh!’ sent the bus swerving into the other lane, and got them a rare reprimand from Takeda. They waited in perfect silence as the next one was typed out.

M: I have this bad habit of getting guys up against the wall

“Holy crap, holy crap Hinata! Who is this chick?”

“Shoyo’s got serious game, Ryuu, we need lessons!”

“What kind of person just writes things like this?” said Yamaguchi.

Finally even Tsukishima loomed over them to check on the uproar.

“I don’t believe my eyes,” said Tanaka. “I don’t know if I want to cry tears of pride or laugh my ass off at you.”

“How exactly did you get yourself into this, Hinata?” said Narita

Hinata was making frantic glances at stone-faced Kageyama. He had never been redder in his whole life, and he felt like sinking through the floor onto the road, where he could be run over and put out of his misery.

“Give it back, please senpais, we shouldn’t all be—”

Another text.

M: You’re so tall, I’m sure it will be easy to get my mouth where I want it

Noya and Tanaka laughed, and the others murmured in confusion. Hinata felt like the blood was boiling in his chest, as he looked at Kageyama in absolute panic. He lunged with all his might and grabbed the phone. Then he flopped back into his seat and buried his head in his jacket.

“Just how short is this girl?” Tanaka laughed. “She must really like you if she’ll _lie_ to your face.”

“She’s so obsessed that she’s gone delusional,” said Nishinoya. “Find me someone who will body-worship like that, Sho-chan.”

“Do you think she might have the wrong number?” said Yamaguchi.

Hinata bolted up. “Yes! She has the wrong number! I don’t even know her! That has to be it!”

“Either way,” said Tsukishima, “This is priceless.”

The bus was already pulling up to the school. Hinata thought he would be able to make a quick getaway, but—

“Put on some practice clothes, we’ll just be here for a little bit,” said Ukai.

They went to the clubroom to get changed, and the captain put a temporary stop to their fooling.

“We could use some more money for the training camp,” said Ennoshita. “Some kind of fundraiser would be good.”

“Like a carwash?” said Yamaguchi.

“A carwash and a wet tshirt contest!” said Tanaka.

“Maybe if it wasn’t winter,” Ennoshita said. “And maybe if we had a team of Ushijimas or someone like that.”

Hinata turned to Kageyama. He had on a white tshirt right now, and it wasn’t hard for Hinata’s imagination to get him the rest of the way.

“What are you looking at me for?” Kageyama said.

The redhead pulled his shirt halfway off, hiding his face so he could die in embarrassment.

“Don’t be flashing so much skin, Hinata,” said Tanaka. “You’re babe’s not in here.”

“And we’ve already seen your godlike physique,” said Nishinoya.

“I wasn’t flashing!”

He was nonfunctional during practice. The anger and embarrassment together were too great a force to be conquered by simple distraction.

_She doesn’t care about anyone but herself. She doesn’t even care if Kageyama likes her, or she wouldn’t have said all that terrible stuff. She never listens and she never lets anyone else have their way. Probably all she wants to do is make out and stuff. And I don’t think about Kageyama in that way because it’s rude!_

“Hinata!”

The serve bounced in front of him, and he dove much too late.

“Uh! Sorry.”

_She’d be saying that stuff to Kageyama, all that creepy, rude…But maybe if it wasn’t in front of everyone, maybe if it was just to him, and he was reading it alone, he might like…I could never say that stuff, it’s totally embarrassing and gross! I mean I wouldn’t. If that’s what Kageyama wants he can—He can go get it from her, because I don’t—think of him—in that way…_

But right at this moment Kageyama was in front of him, with the eyes like thunder and lightning, the hair that Hinata might want to push back from his forehead, the sliver of exposed midriff that he might want to touch, if he could—

Hinata had been going up for the spike. He missed completely and landed hard on his butt.

“Urrrrrrrrgh, that’s it, I’m seriously gonna take myself outside and give me what I deserve! I can’t receive, now I can’t even spike,” he shouted, “Why am I playing—”

Then Kageyama was there, inches from his face, pinning him to the floor.

“You need to calm down.”

Hinata went so still and quiet that it seemed he had obeyed.

_He’s close, he’s so close, his eyes are so—I can’t look away, this is scary, his hands are touching me and our legs are touching and he’s really strong what do I do, I can’t think about him like this I have to stop, stop!_

Kageyama got off him. The team started putting things away. Hinata stood up, covered his face, and yelled. Then he grabbed a mop and took off across the gym, yelling. When he was done he sprinted to the clubroom, still yelling. There were new messages buzzing on his phone, but he shoved it deep into his bag without looking at them.

 

His own room had become a place Hinata dreaded. All he ever did there was hard thinking, and he saw it more as a prison cell than anything else.

_Kageyama is—more than likely—gonna end up dating someone. Even though he doesn’t seem to want to right now, he will eventually. When a person he likes asks him…_

_It’ll probably be a nice girl. I bet it’ll be someone who really does appreciate how cool he is. And he’ll appreciate her…_

Hinata was pacing around the room, twisting his hands and brushing his toes across the carpet, trying desperately not to cry.

 _It—It might be someone like Yachi-san. A nice, really cute girl…_ His breath shuddered _. A cute small girl he can—carry, if he wants to…and hold hands even though his is bigger…And he’ll like going on dates with her because she can make him smile, and he’ll like her hair and the skirts she wears…_

He sat on his bed, crushing his fists into his lap. The tears burned stubbornly, until he let them go.

_She’ll be really nice. She’ll be so polite and smile really nice and she’ll really be good for Kageyama and make him feel special. But…But…But the thing—is…_

_But even if she’s a nice girl, I’ll still hate her!_

_I’ll hate her! I won’t care that she’s nice and small and cute, I’ll hate her! I’ll hate her because—because—_

He sobbed into his pillow.

_I don’t wanna hate her! She doesn’t deserve it, she’s nice! I don’t want to be so mean to her, because she’s a good person. I don’t want to hate her, but I can’t stop…I have to stop, I can’t do this. Please stop! I can’t hate someone Kageyama loves, that means I don’t love him. It means I don’t want to see him be happy, it means I don’t want to do the best thing for him, it means I don’t love him, and I want to! I want to because he deserves it._

_What’s wrong with me, why can’t I love Kageyama? Why can’t I love him and let him be happy and be a good person? I hate myself!_

“I hate it!” he screamed.

He cried long and hard, and it was two hours before his voice recovered its normal strength.

“It’s okay, though…It’ll—be okay. I know that telling Kageyama what I did will make me feel better. Even if he does really hate me, I’ll still feel better. I think…”

He wiped at his face, just to be sure, even though it had been dry for twenty minutes.

“And I’ll get better at not hating it. I’ll work hard, and I’ll get better, I will Kageyama.”

“Okay. I’m ready. I can do this.”

 _Crap, it’s past eleven?_ For one moment of hesitation he held the phone to his chest; the moment was too painful. He had to call.

“What the hell, Hinata.”

The familiar tone got to him instantly. But it didn’t sting at his eyes, only his chest.

“Hey Kageyama. Sorry it’s late, but I have to tell you something.”

“Tell me tomorrow, you jackass.”

“No, I can’t sleep, I—I need to tell you now.”

Kageyama groaned. “What, then.”

“Um, I kind of…Well there’s this girl that likes you.”

“You’re calling me—to talk about—a girl?”

“ _Listen_ , Kageyama. She asked me for your number, but I—I didn’t like her…So I gave her my number instead, and rejected her for you. And I’ve kept trying to keep her away from you, but I shouldn’t have done that, I should’ve told the truth right away. I’m really sorry, it was really mean to her and you, and it’s okay if you get mad, I totally understand why—”

“Shut up. If you don’t like someone what makes you think I’d ever like them?”

Hinata paused, but pressed on.

“She’s—she’s really beautiful, Kageyama, like, the hottest girl in third year. You know Makota Ebisu?”

He didn’t answer.

“She’s got blond hair and—and lots of—curves…You know who I’m talking about, right? Like everyone wants her,” he rushed, “And she wants you, so that’s—Anyway I have her number, I’ll give it to you if you want it.”

He didn’t even have time to make a wish before Kageyama answered.

“I don’t care, I don’t want it. Are you done now?”

“Um—Are you sure?”

“I’m putting you in a trashcan tomorrow. Bye.”

“Wait wait wait, I have to tell you one more thing, that even though she thinks you’ve already rejected her like—three times, she’ll probably talk to you again, so what you should say is that you said no and you meant it. And don’t forget to say how busy you are with club. And you can tell her she’s been pretty mean and rude, so there’s really no reason you should like her. Okay?”

“Kay.”

Kageyama hung up.

“And I’m—sorry…”

He collapsed onto his bed, and slept.

 

The next day, Hinata sprang from his desk at the last bell and was first into the hall. He had only taken three steps when he rammed into someone equally hurried.

“Oh hey Kageyama. We always have perfect timing.”

“Dumbass.”

“Hey wait—You can’t race me through the halls—You know it’s not fair if we don’t have a clear path—”

“KAGEYAMAA.”

He turned. Hinata turned too, because the scream wasn’t his. She had just tore around the corner and spotted the dark hair. Now she pointed as she charged them.

“Makota!” Hinata lurched toward him. “It’s her Kageyama, she’s after you!”

Hinata froze next to him, looking from one to the other. _Now he’s seen her. He might—want her now…_

Kageyama’s eyes were surprised. As she flew toward them, he hardened, preparing to face her. Hinata was watching Makota in terror. When he saw Kageyama’s expression, his shoulders shrunk up and he hid behind him.

_If he does like her, he can save me!_

“Do you have any idea who I am? Do you have a clue who you’re trying to mess with?”

She was a few feet away, gesturing violently and staring Kageyama down.

“You are lucky, _lucky_ , to be getting texts from me. You are _lucky_ I look your way in the halls. You are lucky I even acknowledge your existence. So I’m gonna ask you once again if this is how it’s gonna be, and you better think long and hard about the answer, because this is it!”

Kageyama spoke before Hinata had even begun to think.

“I already answered. I meant that answer.”

She puffed up again.

“You haven’t answered ONE message, you haven’t come up to me, I haven’t even heard from a friend that you’re interested, and you call that an answer? I am—”

“I don’t want to go out,” said Kageyama. “I have club. And I don’t like you.”

Hinata’s eyes widened, and he clutched involuntarily at Kageyama’s shirt.

“Um okay, listen kid, I’m talking right now, so you _pay_ attention. I offered you a gift. A gift means it doesn’t cost you anything, and it costs me everything. So apparently you think a girl a year older, out of your league in brains _and_ beauty, and so far above and beyond you in experience that you don’t even show up on the radar, isn’t good enough for you. Apparently you think I should be begging and screaming and bringing you candy and cute little notes for your bag and offering to cook for you after practice, but let me tell you, _honey_ , I’m not that kind of girl. And just so you know, you are nowhere close to being worth that.”

Kageyama was scowling, and it was one of the special ones, which if directed at Hinata would send him running for his life.

“I’d never date someone who acts like you.”

Her eyes bulged. She put her hands on Kageyama’s chest and began pushing him backwards. Hinata had been cowering behind all this time, but he couldn’t stand to see him assaulted.

“Hey, you stop that,” he said, wiggling between them. “Back off.”

“You! I am so sick of you I’m gonna vomit! Get—”

Her hand was moving to slap him. Kageyama caught her arm. When she pulled he let go immediately. Before either boy could do or say more, she grabbed Kageyama’s shoulders and slammed her knee into his crotch. He bent only slightly, and made no sound.

“And that’s the most I’m ever gonna touch your dick.”

And she strutted away with a smile.

Kageyama turned fast and walked off. Hinata kept at his heel. Most of the students were still crowded at classroom doors, staring at them. Hinata turned red, but he couldn’t see his friend’s face. They rounded a corner and Kageyama stopped to lean against the wall, hands on his knees, choking down painful breaths. The redhead watched with a grimace, clenching his fists to his chest.

“This is all my fault.”

“Shut up,” said Kageyama. He grunted, stood, and they moved on. Hinata walked apart and a little behind him, and was silent almost all the way to the clubroom.

“I feel bad,” he said finally. “Even though she’s mean, I want to say sorry to her too. But I think she’d just come after you again, if she knows it wasn’t you all that time.”

“Don’t,” said Kageyama. “You said what I would’ve said anyway, so it doesn’t matter. Nothing would change.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

“I’m still scared of her, though,” Hinata said.

“Why?”

“Um, have you ever read ‘Killing Stalking’?”

“No.”

“Good.”

_This is terrible! Because of my lying Kageyama got badly hurt. This never would’ve happened if I wasn’t so jealous of Makota._

_Kageyama protected me._

_And I couldn’t protect him. What kind of friend am I if I can’t do that? Having a crush on Kageyama has made me the worst person ever! Maybe I can’t stop liking him, but I can stop getting so mad about other people liking him. I won’t get mad anymore. Kageyama’s my friend and he sometimes is nice to me, so I have to be nice to him, whether I like him or not!_


	6. Define: Best Day Ever

Kageyama’s birthday came on a Saturday. Hinata, as party planner, had insisted that not a single birthday greeting be given to him when he got to morning practice. This early in the day Kageyama himself had not even registered that it was his birthday. But about twenty minutes into practice he did remember, and then there was a tiny concern, only because of the fact that Hinata had not said anything about it.

Hinata of all people wouldn’t forget. Only after this did he think it a little odd that no one else had said anything. Birthdays weren’t a huge deal with the team, but there was always at least a word and some small gifts. Kageyama was treated no different than usual. It didn’t bother him, and he even preferred it this way, except for the fact that Hinata was oblivious.

“Kageyama will you stay and give me some more tosses?”

“You haven’t been very focused today,” Kageyama said.

“I know I know, that’s why I want to do it! Let’s stay, okay, ‘cause you love tossing and today—And you always want to do it more, right?”

Hinata was holding a ball and giving him a crooked half smile. Everyone who was left in the gym, excepting the redhead, knew that when he stood in front of the setter looking like that, Kageyama was going to give in, no matter his mental or physical fatigue.

“I’ll just do some homework in the clubroom,” said Ennoshita, “Until you’re done.”

The pair played for a half hour more. Hinata was oddly quiet, but he smiled a lot, which Kageyama found creepy but didn’t connect to the idea of his birthday. Then, as they were cleaning up, Hinata suddenly vanished. Kageyama grumbled to himself as he finished sweeping the floor. Then he jogged to the clubroom, intending to get after him before he left. When he opened the door, there was a blast of noise, then laughter when Kageyama wore a blank expression.

“Happy birthday!” they chorused again. Nishinoya pulled him inside and shut the door. Hinata was in the middle of the group, holding a circular cake frosted in Karasuno colors. He held it out to him, grinning like anything.

“A—Thanks,” Kageyama said.

“Okay let’s cut it,” said Ennoshita. “We can’t stay all night, parents will start calling.”

They set the cake on a chair and Kinoshita brought out plates. Some of them gathered around Kageyama, patting his back and teasing him.

“You must’ve been so worried, so hurt, so lost,” said Tanaka.

“Sorry,” said Yamaguchi, “It was all Hinata’s idea.”

“Yeah, so blame him for making a big deal.”

“But also thank him, because we wanted to smash the cake over your head,” said Nishinoya.

“Do you like the cake?” said Hinata. “My mom and I made it. Well, I watched her make it. It’s pretty cool though, right?”

Kageyama was handed the first giant piece. Other plates got passed around, and they all shoveled with their forks and tried to talk to him at the same time. He was worried about the heat in his cheeks, but the team was too wound up to pay attention to the details.

“Were you surprised, Kageyama?” Hinata said. “We wanted to really surprise you, that’s why we didn’t say anything to you during practice. But that didn’t make you feel too bad, did it? Were you worried?”

“No.”

“Were you surprised?”

“I guess.”

Hinata laughed at him. “Then you can admit that you were, geez, don’t act so kingly on your birthday.”

“Well, shouldn’t he be able to be a king, since it’s his birthday?” Tanaka said.

“Oh. Yeah, I guess so.”

As each of them finished their cake and packed their bag, they left small gifts in a pile next to the setter. Hinata had planned this also, so that Kageyama wouldn’t have to open them one by one in front of everyone. Instead he thanked them as they were walking out the door. Hinata went out with Nishinoya and a bag of garbage. When he had thrown it he ran back to the clubroom and stood peeking around the corner. Kageyama came out, and Ennoshita followed, turning to lock the door.

“Kageyama!” He grabbed his arm and pulled him around the side of the building.

“Get off.”

“I have to give you my present now. I didn’t want to do it in front of everyone because I thought they might feel bad.”

Kageyama scowled. But Hinata started to smile anyway.

“Do you know what Japan’s national volleyball team is doing today?”

“Today’s their first open scrimmage of the season,” he said.

Hinata nodded fast. Then he held up his hand. “Do you know what these are?”

“Train tickets.”

He nodded again, and smiled even bigger.

“To—Tokyo?”

“To Tokyo!” He threw up his hands. “I didn’t have enough money to get everyone tickets, but then I didn’t know who to choose if it was only gonna be five or six people, so—” His eyes went down, and his voice softened. “I only bought two. So it will just be us, if you want to go.”

“Yeah. Let’s go. When does the train leave?”

He beamed. “Thirty minutes.”

“Come on.”

“Race you.” He bolted, and Kageyama charged after.

 

Kageyama knew everything about Japan’s national team, so while they rode the train he did most of the talking. Hinata listened, more with his eyes than his ears. When they got off in Tokyo, the redhead squirmed through the crowd to an information board.

“Where should we eat, Kageyama?”

He looked around. The bigger boy was having a more difficult time getting to the spot.

“You decided to show up after all?” He ducked under the reaching hand. “Where do you wanna eat?”

“I don’t care, what do you want?”

“No no we have to go where you want. You can even pick a fancy place and get squid or something, ‘cause I have lots of extra money since I only got the two tickets.”

“Let’s go to the closest place then.” Kageyama checked the board. “This one’s five blocks.”

“Five blocks which way?”

“North.”

“Which way’s north?”

“Well the train came from east…”

“No I think we came from west, I thought we went east.”

“No we didn’t.”

“Well, then what street is it on?”

“10th.”

“Okay.” Hinata took off, weaving toward the exit.

“Hey, wait you—”

They managed to find the restaurant, and since it didn’t look like a place that would break Hinata’s bank, Kageyama led him in. Then they hopped a few buses to get to the stadium. As they walked up to it he wrapped his arm around Hinata’s neck, so that he could smash his hand over the redhead’s mouth and stop the painful stream of blabbering. But Hinata shook him off once inside, and they ran up to the court entrance together.

Their eyes went shiny.

“Haaaa! They’re warming up,” Hinata said.

“That’s the starting setter, right there number 5. Furutani Tadashi.”

“Oooo, cool. They’re—They’re huge. Why do they look so big, Kageyama, is the court smaller?”

“It’s the same size.”

“But they’re like—covering it. There’s no place to spike the ball!”

“That’s how it is. Wait til you see how high the blockers go over the net.”

Hinata’s eyes widened at him, but Kageyama was still watching the court. Hinata pulled on his sleeve and led him toward the stands.

“There’s not that many people here,” said Hinata.

“No.”

“We can get a really good seat!” He bounced along, swinging his arms. “Let’s sit at the end. That’s where you can see the setters the best, right?”

“What?”

“That’s what you said. Like at the very first practice, the second time we ever met, when you were telling me why the setter was cool. You said the end—”

“I know what I said. Why would you want to see the setters?”

“Well don’t you want to? It’s your birthday.”

After a moment, he nodded.

Hinata plopped down in the middle of the front row. Kageyama stopped one shy of him and started to sit. Hinata grabbed his arm and pulled him into the adjacent seat.

“No way Kageyama-kun, you’re gonna sit right—next—to me.” He bumped his shoulder with each word.

Half the players were in red, and the other half in white.

“The setter…” Kageyama stared. “He’s so strong—It’s so easy.”

“Does he do a lot of attacks?”

“Not a lot. But when he does, they’re incredible.”

“Woah.”

Hinata looked around the stadium. “Hm. Why isn’t anyone else sitting in the bottom seats? Why don’t they sit up close?”

A spike came rocketing off the floor and flew at them. Hinata squawked and ducked. Kageyama leaned toward him and caught the ball. He tossed it down to a waiting player, who gave a grateful wave.

“Huh? Ha! Kageyama you touched the ball, you got to touch their ball, hahaha awesome! You threw it back to that guy and everything.”

“I did it to save your ass, so be more happy about that, bastard.”

“They even have their names on their practice jerseys,” Hinata said. He frowned at Kageyama, who didn’t notice. “Hmm. Red’s fine, but what will you look like in white?”

“Huh? Just pay attention, dumbass.”

Hinata muttered to himself.

 

The match began. The first server launched the ball into the air, and blasted it at the net, shocking Hinata to his core. His arms flew up to hide his eyes. Kageyama tugged at him.

“You idiot, they received it, look.”

“But Kageyama! It’s so scary there’s no way—”

“They just got a kill, dumbass. You missed it.”

“Hey. Who’s that guy? Number six! He’s in the front row, but he’s shorter than everyone else. Is that a small spiker?” He stood up and gripped the guard rail. “They have a small spiker?!”

“I can’t see, moron, sit down.”

Hinata shrank back as the next serve went over. The libero popped it up, but went flying backwards into a roll. Hinata gasped. The setter tossed, but suddenly there was a huge block looming. The spike was stuffed down for a point.

“Oo.” Kageyama looked at Hinata, who had his hand over his mouth. “It’s just one point,” Kageyama said.

The next rally was long. The pair lurched and leaned in their seats, as the defense made save after save, and the blockers touched ball after ball. It was the small wing spiker who finally made the kill, and Hinata jumped to his feet.

“Yes!”

He glanced at Kageyama, then sat back down.

“Hey Kageyama, what team are we cheering for?”

“Japan.”

“Ha ha, very funny. You want number 5 to win, don’t you. Then I’m gonna cheer against him.”

“Serve’s up.”

“Ahh! These are so terrible—Holy! Was that a dump just now, was that the setter? It was so fast I couldn’t see it.”

Kageyama smirked.

As the game went on, they ‘oo’ed at blocks and ‘ah’ed at impressive receives. A libero leapt over the scorer’s table to save the ball, and Hinata grabbed Kageyama’s arm in panic. Kageyama pulled away instinctively, not taking his eyes off the court. It seemed like no time had passed before the red team was up 20-18.

“Kageyama do you have to go to the bathroom?”

“No.”

“I have to pee really bad.”

“Have fun missing the match.”

“Why’d you make me do that water drinking contest?”

“You started that, and now you lost twice ‘cause you had to pee first.”

“Bakageyama.”

“Hold it until this set’s over.”

The toss went up. The towering middle blocker took a vicious swing, pounding the ball into a corner. Hinata lurched forward.

“Ahhh—Ah.” He looked at his lap. “I can’t wait, it’s too exciting, I’ll leak.”

Kageyama threw him a look.

“Tell me what happens.” He pawed at his knee on the way by.

Hinata came back quickly, with two big cups.

“Now you’re having more to drink, stupid?”

“They’re giving away free slushies,” he said. “Do you want blue or red? Either way I already drank out of both.”

“You dumbass—”

“I’m joking. Here, have blue, ‘cause I actually did drink out of the red one.”, Hinata sat down. “I think.”

Kageyama glared, but he didn’t notice.

 

Hinata never overcame his urge to cringe at the serves. In contrast Kageyama would lean forward, willing the passers to get under the ball. Sometimes Hinata covered his eyes, when he was feeling especially bad for someone who had been blocked. And in the tenser moments he grabbed onto Kageyama, without either of them noticing.

Kageyama mumbled his way through the first two sets, talking to himself about every detail of the setter’s movements. In the third set his companion started to take more notice.

“What’d you say?”

“Nothing.”

“You’re watching the setter, aren’t you.”

“Aren’t you? He’s amazing.”

The setter leapt up and tossed a bullet to the wing spiker, who slammed it for a point. Kageyama muttered again.

“What is it? What’d you see?”

Hinata was cocking his head at him. Kageyama looked back to the court.

“He flicked his wrists at the last second, so the whole time it looked like he was going for a back set, but he went forward.”

“Ooo, super cool! That’s amazing that you can tell that from here.”

“It’s not hard, if you’d pay actual attention,” he said.

“Well I can’t look at everything at once—”

He failed to see the little spot of pink at the back of Kageyama’s cheek.

As Hinata coaxed, the dark-haired boy became more open with his enthusiasm. Soon both of them were jumping to their feet, turning away dramatically, and giving each other wide-eyed looks. Neither noticed that the frequency of the squeezes on Kageyama’s arm was increasing. By the final set, when Hinata should be at peak concentration, he found himself looking less at the court, and longer at his friend.

 _He’s really excited, look how much his hands are moving…His cheeks are warm, that’s really cute. Was that—a real—smile?_ His shoulders went limp _. He really loves volleyball._

“Yes! I knew he was gonna go there that time, I knew it,” Kageyama said.

Hinata looked at the team huddled in celebration. He looked back at Kageyama.

“What? Hey, did you even see that just now? He sent it to the middle even though he was almost directly behind him, I knew he was going to because I would’ve done the same thing, I would’ve sent it right to you.”

 _Me?_ He wanted to smile, and thought that he should, but for some reason he felt like it would hurt. So he didn’t. Kageyama turned from him _._

“It totally fools the defense,” he said, “Because it looks like the stupidest thing you could do as a setter.”

“But you’d still do it?” said Hinata. “Even though it makes you look stupid?”

“Of course I would.”


	7. Best Day Ever, Continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhhhaha this chapter contains my absolute favorite part, I hope you enjoy!

Once the red team had defeated the white, 3 sets to 2, the announcer informed them of a meet and greet to be held in the downstairs lounge. Kageyama and Hinata flew out of the stadium, but had trouble finding the place, and by the time they did, the players and most of the crowd was already there. Hinata sprinted to the small spiker, but was pushed back by bigger bodies and ended up fourth in line. Kageyama stood next to him, eyes aimed steadily across the room at the pair of setters.

“Kageyama. Kageyama-kuuun.”

“Hm.”

“You go over there, the line’s short right now. Go see the setters.”

“No.” He pulled his eyes away from them. “I’ll wait until you’re done.”

“Pfff. You never wait for me. You’re just being all shy.”

“I’m not. We’ll see them eventually, it doesn’t matter.”

“They’re gonna notice you drooling and being creepy at them from across the room.”

“Shut up!”

Hinata rolled his eyes, grabbed Kageyama’s jacket, and pulled him toward them.

“Hey there.”

“Hi. We’re high schoolers, we play in the Miyagi prefecture.”

“I have a niece on a soccer team in that prefecture,” said the backup setter. “Nice to meet you, I’m Goyo Rei.”

“I’m Hinata, this is Kageyama. He’s our team’s setter.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Furutani Tadashi, Japan’s starting setter.” He smirked at Goyo. “For now.”

“I’ve studied your high school and college play, as well as national,” Kageyama said.

“Kageyama was invited to the youth intensive training his first year,” said Hinata.

“How old are you now?”

“Second year,” said Kageyama.

“Since junior high people have called him a genius.”

“Is that so?” Goyo exchanged a smile with his teammate. “We don’t know much about that prefecture, maybe if we’d pay more attention we would’ve heard of you.”

“I went to that training camp,” said Furudani, “My second and third year.”

Hinata’s eyes burned, momentarily alarming the pros.

“Is it really really fun? Kageyama never says much about it.”

“It’s pretty intense. And that makes it fun.”

“So cool.”

“Um,” said Kageyama, “Do you—do you work with each other a lot? Or do you mostly compete?”

As the three setters talked, Hinata’s smile grew bigger and bigger, until it was painful. He nodded his approval, and was about to walk away. But Kageyama discreetly grabbed onto his coat, keeping him by his side.

By the time Kageyama was half satisfied with his setter chat, the small spiker was being crowded by a father and his many small children. So they moved down to one of the liberos instead. He looked older than most of the other players. At the same time Hinata stepped forward to introduce himself, another boy stepped forward. He stared at Hinata, then was joined by a second boy.

“Hey hey, it’s Karasuno! Their setter and that number 10.”

Hinata and Kageyama looked at each other.

“Who are you guys?”

“We’re second years from Fukurodani. We never got to play in matches last year, so we didn’t face you guys.”

“Oh, so you’re from here in Tokyo, huh?” Hinata said.

“You have Akaashi Keiji as your setter?” said Kageyama.

“Yeah, he’s captain. And you better watch out, genius, because Akaashi’s not afraid of any setter, and he’s not easily impressed.”

“Neither am I.”

“It’s true, he’s not,” said Hinata.

As Kageyama began to argue with them, Hinata turned to the libero, who was enjoying the confrontation.

“Hi, I’m Hinata Shoyo.”

“Hayashi Gou. You play volleyball, huh? You’ve got the build of a defender.”

“Um, no, I’m—actually a middle blocker.”

He laughed, but not in a way that made Hinata hang his head. This laugh made him grin.

“But we do have an awesome libero on our team,” he said.

“Karasuno you said, right?”

“Yeah. He’s shorter than me but quick, and he’s never afraid, because he’s so crazy.”

Hinata gave him a half a minute crash course on Nishinoya’s bruises, foot saves, and rolling thunder. The libero laughed again.

“Sounds like he’s got the stuff, all right. Give him a pat on the back from me. It’s not easy doing all the dirty work. It’s not easy, and it doesn’t get you glory. Except—” he clapped Hinata’s shoulder, “From your teammates.”

“I will, I’ll pat his back. He’s awesome.”

“If you think he’s awesome, he really is. I can tell that about you.”

Then Hinata backed off, to give some other waiters a turn. Kageyama was still talking with the Fukurodani kids, so Hinata was about to leave him. This time Kageyama stepped on his foot, preventing him again.

When it was finally time to meet the small hitter, Hinata’s face burst into sunshine. But as they got closer, it faded, and faded. When they finally got to him, and Hinata had to look up into the face of this “small” hitter, his eyes began drowning in clouds.

“Hey there, what’s your names?”

“I—I’m Hinata. And Kageyama.”

“Where are you from?”

“Karasuno—Um, Karasuno High School, in Miyagi.”

“Mm, okay. You guys play volleyball?”

“Yeah, he’s setter, I’m—middle blocker.”

“Middle, that’s interesting. What’s the logic behind that?”

“Because I’m not the ace.”

“Because he can jump, and is faster than all the tall guys,” said Kageyama. “He takes lots of tosses in the middle, to clear up the way for our outsides.”

“Cool, very cool. Speed and vertical, those are my weapons too. But most of the time they’re barely enough. If I was any smaller, I’d never make it,” he chuckled.

It was mostly Kageyama who carried the conversation. When they had turned their backs on the hitter, Hinata stared at his feet.

“He’s taller than you.”

“Hey,” said Kageyama. “He said _he_ wouldn’t make it. That doesn’t mean you won’t.”

As Kageyama watched him, the redhead smiled to himself. Then there was a call from across the room.

“Hey Karasuno. Come get a picture.”

The libero had called them. He was standing next to a huge middle blocker. Hinata looked at Kageyama. Kageyama looked at him.

“Let’s go,” said the taller boy.

Hinata grinned and ran to them. They handed their phones to some assistants, and got pictures with the blocker and libero, then with Furutani, who joined the group. Then the two kids from Fukurodani came over. Then Goyo and another hitter jumped in, demanding more photos. Hinata took a peek at Kageyama; he seemed to be doing okay, though of course he wasn’t smiling.

They got their phones back, and as Hinata scrolled through the pictures, Japan’s setter and libero came up beside him.

“Let’s see. Good good, there’s something to show your awesome libero.”

“You have an awesome libero and an awesome setter?” said Furutani. “That’s pretty special.”

“Your setter? That kid, he’s pretty awesome?”

“Kageyama’s probably…the most awesome player on our team,” said Hinata

“Maybe so,” Furutani said, “But I got the impression he thinks you’re pretty awesome too.”

Hinata looked hard at him for a single moment.

“I’m only awesome because he is.”

Furutani smiled. The libero was smiling too, as he said:

“You guys went to Nationals last year, didn’t you?”

“Yeah yeah, we did, how’d you know that?”

“I guessed. That setter tossing to you is the heart of the offense. And if your heart has unselfish attitudes like that, it sets the team up for success. That’s the kind of team that gets to Nationals.”

Hinata glowed.

“You know—Well you do know, but anyway, you kids are awesome.” Then the libero pulled off his practice jersey. He took a marker out of his pocket, then used his knee as a table so he could write on the shirt. He handed it to Hinata. “Take that back to show your guardian.”

“Woooooah. Thank you! I’ll give it to Kageyama, it’s his birthday.”

“Is it really?” said the setter. “In that case, I won’t be outdone by you.”

Furutani turned from the libero and walked toward Kageyama, pulling off his own jersey.

Kageyama was still looking at his phone. There was one particular picture he couldn’t get past; Hinata had been caught looking at him instead of at the camera. But the redhead was still wearing his picture perfect smile, which made it look like he was beaming at the other boy, as if Kageyama were the best thing in the world. For the last minute he had been staring at it, hardly able to think.

“Hey.”

He looked up at Furutani Tadashi.

“So how old are you today?”

Kageyama’s eyes flashed in Hinata’s direction.

“Uh—Sixteen.”

Hinata had said goodbye to the libero, and was about to make his way to Kageyama, when the Fukurodani kids called him over. They were interested in arguing about the skill level of his setter, and the redhead was ready to cooperate. It was all about volleyball, until:

“Well whatever. I know there’s at least one thing our setter won’t be beat at.”

“Good looks?” said the other boy.

“Yeah, that’s what I was gonna say.”

“What?” said Hinata. “Pffff. Kageyama’s better looking than him.”

“No freakin way.”

“I told you he’s the best at everything, and I meant everything, so he’s the best looking setter too.”

“No way,” said the second boy, “There isn’t a single volleyball player period, let alone another setter, who’s prettier than Akaashi-san.”

“Kageyama is too prettier, I’ve seen Akaashi-san up close when I played against him. You’ve never seen Kageyama up close, and I’m telling you he’s prettier!”

“We were just standing there talking to him for like ten minutes.”

“But you haven’t seen him in his black uniform and when he’s in the good court lighting and his bangs do this wavy thing they do, and if you did you would totally admit he’s the prettiest.”

“No no no, Akaashi’s hair is just as black as his, probably blacker, _and_ it’s curly—”

“But if it’s curly it doesn’t do the bangs thing like Kageyama—”

“Who cares about the bangs thing, you can’t see someone’s face well if they’re moving around that fast—”

“You can if you pay attention, I—”

Someone walked up beside him, and Hinata’s voice squeaked when he saw who it was.

“Kageyama! I was just talking, are you ready to go? It’s pretty late, we should leave now, we have to catch a train,” he said to the other two. “You guys are cool, it was nice meeting you, can’t wait to kick your butts!”

He pulled Kageyama away.

“Kageyama what’s that? Did the setter—He gave you his jersey! He’s your favorite right? And you’re gonna be Japan’s next setter so you’ll be like following in his footsteps. He’s like your ultimate senpai, that is so cool that you got his jersey and got to meet him! Did he sign it?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s it say?”

Kageyama handed him the jersey.

“’You’re only as strong as your trust in others. Keep doing good work. Happy 16th, it’s just the beginning. Furutani Tadashi, JNT, Setter.’ Haaaahaha! The coolest, that is the coolest Kageyama!” He handed it back. “Damn that guy, he just made the rest of our presents suck.”

“Well, I wouldn’t have gotten this present if you didn’t give me yours.”

“Well don’t blame me, Kageyama, geez! It’s not like I knew you’d get something that would make—”

“Gah, you idiot, that’s not what I meant.”

Hinata gasped violently.

“Kageyama! We have to talk about the match! The match, everything we saw, it was all so cool we haven’t even talked about it yet!”

They did talk, so eagerly that they didn’t notice the magical glow of the city lights they were walking under. Sometimes it would be a full minute before they realized they were both speaking at once, and then they were forced to backtrack and sort out what they had missed. But they didn’t argue. At one point Hinata managed to stay quiet for several minutes straight, because he couldn’t resist against the uncharacteristic heat in Kageyama’s voice. Suddenly Kageyama turned and stopped him by pressing a hand down hard on his head.

“I know we can do that,” he said, even bending down a little toward Hinata’s face. “I know we can.”

Hinata felt a lightning shiver of excitement through his body. Without thinking he reached out and pressed his fist to Kageyama’s chest. They stared for a moment. Then both took their hands away, and looked around them for the first time.

“Wait. Wait,” said Hinata. “Where—are we?”

“I don’t have a clue, I just kept walking where you were, I thought you were taking us back to the station.”

“Crap, I don’t know where we are at all, Tokyo’s huge we could be fifty miles from the trains! What time is it?”

“It’s 10:15, when does our train leave?”

“We’re okay, we’re okay. It leaves at 11.”

“We’re not okay, we have no idea where we are! We had to ride the bus a long time to get to the stadium, and who knows how far we are from there now.”

“Look look look, there’s a bus stop right up there! We’ll just get on and somehow we’ll get back. At least we still have time. Don’t worry Kageyama, I won’t let you get lost on your birthday.”

“Me? You think this is my fault? You’ve been running around this whole time without a clue—”

They made their noisy way by a series of buses, back to the street on which they’d had dinner.

“There, the station’s right up there,” said Hinata. “And we’re still early even! We have just enough time for it.”

“For what?”

“We have to get meat buns. You have to have them on your birthday. Kenma told me there’s a good place around here—Aha!”

Kageyama grabbed his hood. “Stop running away like that.”

“Okay, but we have to hurry.”

They got their buns, and then their seats, and talked nonstop about the national team, up until the last half hour of the ride. By then Kageyama was back to his dead serious quiet, leaning against the window and staring out. Hinata was falling asleep in his seat. Kageyama glanced over, grabbed the redhead by the coat before he could topple into the aisle. Hinata jerked awake and latched onto Kageyama’s arm.

“Bring it on I’m not scared I’ll fight—Kageyama. What do you want, I didn’t mean it so just leave me alone—”

“Shhhh shut up, shut the hell up.” He released him. “We’re almost there.”

“Oh.” Hinata smiled. “This is the end of my present, then.”

“Yeah. Thanks,” he said to the window.

“You’re welcome.”

Kageyama’s hands tightened on the jersey in his lap. Then he lifted one and squeezed the top of the other boy’s head.

“Ack—”

But then Hinata looked up, as Kageyama tilted him side to side in what appeared to be a friendly way, though he did it without the trace of a smile. He let go. Hinata turned away to hide his warm face.

 

As soon as they stepped out of the station, Hinata staggered and bumped shoulders with Kageyama.

“Ah! Since when is it so windy?”

“What time is it?”

“I don’t know, late.”

“Come stay at my house. If you try to ride home you’ll either fall asleep or freeze.”

“Wha—What? Stay at your house?”

“It’s this way, not far.”

Kageyama had already started walking. Hinata stood in the road, curling and uncurling his fists, waiting for the stomach ache he knew was going to come from something this nerve-wracking.

“Hurry up.”

“Um, is it okay?”

“Yeah.”

“But—you haven’t asked.”

“They’re not gonna turn you away.”

Hinata hurried up behind him. “But I have to ask. I mean tell. My parents.”

“Well keep walking. I’ll let you stay but I’m not gonna die out here for you.”

“Bakageyama.” He pulled out his phone and called home. “Hi Dad. Um, I’m in Torono now. The train just got back. Yeah, sorry. I know it is, so I’m gonna stay here in town with Kageyama. Yeah he lives here. No Dad, we’re not going somewhere to get in trouble. Yes. Yes. Yes I’m sure. Yeah I’ll be okay, we’re almost there already. Sorry you had to wait up. Okay. Bye.”

They were silent for the next two blocks, as Hinata was nervous, and the other felt no need to talk. Kageyama turned right, and they approached the third white house in the row. A bottom window was dully lit, and a top glowed bright. They walked up to it. Kageyama opened the door, pushed him inside, and closed it. Hinata held his breath for a moment, then sighed at the relief from cold and the noisy wind.

“He’s home,” a voice called from somewhere. A man came into the hall in front of them. He had dark hair and glasses, and was wearing a checkered robe. He was a little taller than Kageyama.

“Did you have a good—Oh. Hello there.”

Hinata instantly put on his best smile. “Hello.”

There were footsteps, and Kageyama’s mom joined the party, peeking over her husband’s arm. She was also in a robe, and her brown hair hung down over her shoulder.

“A—Tobio, is this—a friend?”

Hinata bowed. “I’m sorry for the intrusion, and I’m sorry we got back so late.”

He straightened up, and Kageyama spoke before his parents could.

“He lives on the other side of the mountains, so I said he should stay with me for tonight.”

“Of course, of course,” his mom said. “Certainly he should stay here.”

“Introduce us, Tobio,” said his dad.

“This is Hinata, he’s in my year and on the team.”

“Ohh,” said his mom, “Hinata, the one you always talk a—” She stopped herself.

“We’ve heard of you,” said his dad. “You’re very welcome to stay, it’d be a pleasure to have you.”

“Th—Thank you.” He made another quick bow. “I am really sorry it’s so late. And sorry I kept Kageyama away for his whole birthday…”

“Oh it’s no problem, he’s spent plenty of birthdays with us,” his dad said. “I’m sure he preferred this.”

“Why don’t you take him upstairs, Tobio, and start getting situated. I’ll bring up some things.”

She pulled on his dad’s shoulder, and the two of them backed into another room. Kageyama led him down the hall and up the stairs. Hinata wanted to tell him his parents were nice, but he was getting jittery. Kageyama opened up the door to his room. It had bare white walls, and nothing lying amiss on the blue carpet. There was a bed in the corner, a desk next to it, and one dresser. Hinata spotted an alarm clock.

“It’s so late that it’s not even your birthday anymore.”

“Yeah.” Kageyama closed the door, pulled his bag over to his desk, and started taking out his gifts. “Watch out, she’s gonna come in here any time.”

Hinata cocked his head, then realized and stepped away from the door. A moment later there was a knock.

“Yeah,” Kageyama said.

His dad peeked in. “I’m making some tea before bed, just wondering if you want any. There were some pretty red cheeks when you came in.”

He looked at Hinata first.

“No thank you, I don’t want any, thank you.”

Kageyama shook his head.

“All righty. Um, Hinata, if you don’t mind I’d like to meet you properly—” He stepped into the room and held out his hand. “I’m Kageyama Sato.”

They shook hands.

“I work as a travel journalist, and my wife Miyika is a real estate agent.”

“I’m Hinata Shoyo. I—I’m from Yukigaoka. And I play middle blocker on the volleyball team. Um, nice to meet you.” He smiled at the floor.

“Nice to meet you, Hinata. Don’t be afraid of making a little noise during your sleepover, it’s perfectly fine. Sleep tight.”

“Goodnight,” Hinata said before the door had closed.

He turned and saw his friend lying on the bed with a pillow over his face. His dad’s entrance had made Kageyama want to kill him. The handshake had made him want to die himself. And the mention of a sleepover had effectively ended him.

“Do I look like someone who makes a lot of noise?” said Hinata, with real curiosity. “Or did you tell them I was?”

He bounced over to the desk to look at Kageyama’s presents.

“All the candy’s from people who have crushes on you, huh.”

Hinata stopped, even his breathing. Lying on the desk was a wrinkled piece of paper.

It said “Kageyama: What You Like.”

He snatched it, but at that moment Kageyama sat up and saw him.

“Hey, what are you doing with that?”

He flashed a smile to hide his panic. “Were you writing down all the reasons you’re so great?”

“I didn’t write it. It looks like Kinoshita-san did. Do you know anything?”

“What, about this? Uh, no.”

“You’re a pathetic liar.”

“Hey, shut up.”

“So did he write it?”

“Yeah, but—but he was just writing down all the things girls were saying about you, in school. Because he wanted to tease Tanaka-san and Noya-san with it, ‘cause they’re jealous of the attention you get.”

“Oh. You can throw it then.”

Kageyama turned his back. Hinata, taking a last glance at the paper, noticed that things had been added in pen. It looked like Kageyama had written something beside each of the list points. Glancing over his shoulder, Hinata set it in the trashcan by the desk.

The door opened and Hinata flinched. Kageyama’s mom came in, bringing blankets and a big smile.

“Here we are, with these you can make up a nice little spot on the floor. I’m so sorry we don’t have a guest room, Hinata. But Tobio will offer you his bed of course, because you’ll get first choice. We’re so happy to have you stay with us.”

Hinata returned her smile, as brightly as he could. He thought it was funny, and a little sweet, and also a little sad, that his parents were so concerned about their son’s guest. Because he knew why.

“You never have friends over, do you Kageyama?” he said when she had gone.

Kageyama was about to retort, but Hinata was smiling and scrunching his nose in a funny way, so the other boy’s face eased out of its pout.

“No,” he said simply. Then he scowled. “Do you want the—”

“No no, of course not,” said Hinata, “It’s your birthday!”

“Yeah.”

While Kageyama changed clothes, Hinata unfolded each of the blankets and padded up a spot in the middle of the floor. Kageyama was about to lay down when his mom peeked in again.

“Tobio,” she said a little sharply, before switching back to a warm voice. “Be sure to borrow Hinata-kun some clean clothes to sleep in.” She turned to the redhead. “And if you want anything to eat or drink before bed, Tobio will take you to the kitchen.”

“Oh okay, thank you. But I’m fine. And don’t mind about the clothes, I’m okay like this.”

“We insist.” She was giving her son a threatening smile. Once Kageyama had gotten off his bed, she waved to Hinata and left.

“Goodnight,” he called again.

“Goodnight, boys.”

“Sorry I don’t have anything from primary school anymore,” Kageyama said as he dug through a drawer. Hinata growled.

“Those aren’t your real parents, are they,” he teased.

Kageyama threw a shirt at him. Hinata turned away and pulled his off. He started to tug the other on.

“Oo, soft.”

Kageyama turned around, sweatpants in hand, and froze.

Hinata was there with his back to him, in the shirt that almost covered his butt, little fists at his sides as he kicked his pants off his feet. He turned his head to look at Kageyama, who covered his nose as he felt it oozing. He went to the door.

“Just wear your shorts,” he said as he left.

Hinata frowned. But he didn’t realize that the cutest he had ever been was now, when he wasn’t trying, in Kageyama’s junior high shirt, with big wondering eyes and bare legs prickling with cold.

_I’m in his room. I’m in my crush’s room alone, what should I do? What can I do? I should do something, this is a good chance if only I knew what to use it for…_

Kageyama was in the bathroom, glaring at the mirror as he waited for the blood to stop.

Hinata had curled up in the blankets by the time he came back. Kageyama turned off the light, got into bed and pulled the covers up to his chin. Hinata watched. _He sleeps in a sweatshirt and with blankets? That’s so funny and cute. I should add it to the list. The list!_

When he had listened to Kageyama’s breathing for a while, and was pretty sure he was asleep, Hinata crawled to the trash can and took out the crumpled paper. Kageyama’s pen had commented on each of the items.

1\. Inky blue eyes, shiny when concentrating

Kageyama had put a question mark next to it.

2\. Strong shoulders, for fast tossing and hard serving

 _Could be stronger_ , he had written.

3\. Confident when he talks (esp. name)

Three question marks.

4\. Looks out for spikers when they face a good block, but tends to try too hard

_Why wouldn’t they want me to try hard?_

5\. Hair looks like a crow’s feathers

Two question marks.

6\. Sleeps in class, isn’t embarrassed or trying to be tough around people

_I don’t try to be tough._

7\. Hair, shoes, etc. all match K uniform, cool and intimidating

_Good_

8\. Happy face bc of team spirit

Two question marks, and _I have a good team_.

Hinata was smiling, and hurting a little in the chest. _I just…I really like him so much_. He was near enough to the bed to lean his head against it. For some reason, the fact that Kageyama was asleep made Hinata feel very close to him.

“Happy birthday, Kageyama,” he murmured.

“Thanks.”

Hinata froze. He launched himself into his blankets, curled under them and peeked. But Kageyama had been facing away the whole time, and still was. Hinata reached to set the paper in the trash. He looked at the back of Kageyama’s head, the only part he could see. _His hair’s so black. Even in the dark it looks dark. That’s so cool. Crap, I can’t think this stuff when he’s awake, it’s scary._

_I like you._

Kageyama had been tired on the train, and walking home, but now that he was in his room at the end of the day, he didn’t feel sleepy. He was thinking about what Hinata had done. With two train tickets he had given him the best birthday of his life, and possibly the best twelve or thirteen hours he had ever had off the court. He’d spent a lot of money and a lot of time on just one person. On just one friend, when he had dozens.

But then, Hinata had always spent a lot of time on him. Lots of time listening, teasing, eating, and playing…

He was only thinking because he was awake. He was only awake because of how happy he felt. He had never been happy in this way, without feeling accomplished, feeling active, feeling like he’d done good work. He hadn’t done any work or tried hard on their trip. But he was sure he had been happy. And for a moment, before he pushed it away, he thought that he knew why he was still feeling that way now, after it was over.

The boy who had done all those things that made him happy was still here.

 

Hinata woke early, to his relief. He had decided during the restless night that it was too weird to be in Kageyama’s room with him. So he was preparing to leave without anyone knowing, but wanted to do something to his advantage before he did. He thought hard as he folded up the blankets and stacked them on the floor, but nothing came to him. He pulled the list out of the garbage and wrote a note on the back:

Will wash shirt and give back.

Thanks

Hinata

He left it on top of the blankets. As he checked his bag for anything missing, he came upon another birthday present. The day before he had debated about giving it to him, and last night he had forgotten completely. It might not help his chances with Kageyama, but he figured a surprise present would be better than nothing. He slipped the gift under the note, and tried not to look at the sleeping setter as he left the room.

As Hinata passed the kitchen, the pictures on the fridge caught his eye. He tiptoed over to look at them. Many were travel photos. The small Kageyama had been to lots of places, but he was hardly smiling in any of them. _He was actually little once...Urrrgh, he was a really cute kid…_ There was a notepad on the fridge, so Hinata took the pen and wrote:

Sorry for the intrusion,

thank you very much

for letting me stay,

you’re a very

nice family.

Hinata Shoyo

He turned the last ‘o’ into a smiley.

Then he left the house.

 

His mom’s calling woke Kageyama a little before noon. He rolled over and sat up, just as she entered his room.

“You must have brought home the nicest boy in your school last night. He wrote us the sweetness note, and he was just—perfectly polite while he was here.”

“Yeah, while he was here,” Kageyama said.

She reached down to pick up the extra blankets, and found the other note.

“Oh, he left you one too. Ooo, and something else.”

She handed the present and note to Kageyama. He didn’t want to open it in front of her, because it might either be a joke or something embarrassing, but his mom wasn’t budging, so it couldn’t be helped. He unwrapped a small photo album. The cover was Karasuno colors. He opened it.

There were four photos at the beginning, and the rest of the album had been left empty. The first was of Tsukishima and Yamaguchi asleep on the bus. Kageyama was next to them in the aisle, glaring at someone off camera and holding his finger to his lips. Hinata was behind their seat, covering his mouth to stop the giggles. Kageyama flipped past this one before his mom could question him.

The second picture was Kageyama talking in the gym, while Sugawara and Hinata paid eager attention. The third was of Nishinoya, standing on a chair in the clubroom and holding Kageyama’s shorts above his head. Kageyama was reaching up for them, while Tanaka laughed in the background and Hinata pulled on the back of Kageyama’s shirt.

His mom chuckled.

The last photo had been taken in front of the sports store in Tokyo. Hinata and Ennoshita were smiling, Tanaka was making a goofy face, and Kageyama was doing neither.

“That is so cute. A thoughtful gift from a very thoughtful person. I swear he’s a little angel, that face is just precious”

His mom stopped, because she could see that the gift had a quieting effect on him. After she left, Kageyama closed the album, set it on his desk, and stacked his schoolbooks on top of it. There was one thing worse than having no friends, he’d decided, and that was having to look at pictures of all the things you and your friends had done.

 

It was only when Hinata placed the clean shirt in his bag the following morning that he noticed the “TOBIO” printed down the right shoulder in the back. _Seriously? That’s so embarrassing! I don’t know why, but…it’s just really embarrassing to have your crush’s first name on your shirt. Well I guess it’s not as bad as the last name, but—Uhhh, what the heck…_

He was anxious to return it to its owner, and did so immediately after entering the clubroom.

“You didn’t have to wash it, you used it once,” Kageyama said. “And the only person who would wear it again is you if you ever stay over—”

“I don’t want to wear it ever again.”

Hinata shoved it at him and quickly left. Kageyama threw the shirt into his bag, a little more angrily than necessary.


	8. Define: Competition

In early January, Karasuno traveled to the seaside for a week-long training camp. Their bus happened to arrive at the exact time as another, and both teams got out at once, eyeing each other. Yamaguchi, standing next to Hinata, gasped.

“It’s that Yoshida, the second year ace,” he murmured. “From Tsubakihara Academy.”

“What, really? Which one, which one is he?”

“Shhh, be quieter, Hinata. It’s the tallest one. With the brown hair.”

“Whaaaaa? Are you sure? Are you _sure_?”

“That’s him,” Kageyama said behind them.

“Is he—like—really good looking?” Hinata murmured to Yamaguchi.

“Oh yeah. He was featured in the Jump! magazine and Vogue Japan at the same time. He’s a model for fashion advertising.”

“Wha—But—What the heck! No fair!”

Hinata stiffened. The ace was looking over at he and Yamaguchi, who had been left at the bus. The guy smiled, brilliantly even though it was just a half smirk. He walked over.

“Hey. You’re King Kageyama, aren’t you.”

Hinata turned around. Kageyama was still behind them, just straightening up with his bag. He looked back at the guy, who was about an inch taller.

“You’re the new ace everyone’s making a big deal about.”

“I’m Yoshida. I’ve seen you in magazines,” he said. “But they don’t do you justice, apparently. You have a girl or boyfriend?”

Hinata’s jaw dropped. Then he felt Kageyama’s hand on his head.

“This is our decoy.” He tilted Hinata’s head back, so that he was looking up into the guy’s face. “Easy to see. Hard to catch up to. So watch out.”

Kageyama walked away. Yoshida was laughing good-naturedly. Hinata’s mouth flapped like a fish’s, as he failed to think of anything to say. He turned and ran after his teammate.

“Hey! Kageyama, what the heck’s with that? I—I was gonna rough that guy up, but then—you came and embarrassed me! What kind of friend…”

 

The next morning was their first match. When they got to the gym, there were already teams warming up on the other court. One of them was Yoshida’s.

“Ah, this guy,” said Ennoshita. “We’ll get to catch a bit of his play, maybe.”

“I’ve heard almost every team talking about him,” Kinoshita said. “He’s rated the top spiker in his prefecture. And top five in Japan.”

Kageyama stood next to them, and Hinata next to him. The redhead was watching Kageyama’s face as Yoshida ran up to hit. The change in his brow was small, but it was still a change, and Hinata scowled.

The others walked on, but Hinata stayed, waiting for the ace to hit again. He wasn’t terribly tall, but that made it all the worse. He relied on his jump, just as Hinata did. And because of his strong build, it looked extremely powerful when he went into the air. _Dammit. Dammit!_ The ball ripped down the line, and Yoshida jogged after it, brown curls bouncing casually, wrists coolly relaxed as his arms pumped.

“Hey, Hinata,” Tanaka called. “Come on man, don’t keep your senpais waiting.”

But he couldn’t move. His neck was hot, and a painful knot was balling and unballing in his chest. He could feel the stomachache coming on. But the familiar feelings, now renewed, were worse this time. This was not a hot girl. He jumped high. He hit hard. He was bigger, was mature, was good looking on the level of his very own Kageyama. Here was someone who in every way seemed to be

_Better than me._

Their match went on at the same time as the famous ace’s. Hinata was lively, spurred on by his twinging stomach and his setter’s serious look. He barreled toward the right sideline, but the block was tailing him. He stopped on a dime and jumped up, as the opponents went flying by with their momentum.

“Kageyama!”

The set was adjusted in an instant and came short. Hinata blasted it onto the front line.

“Yeeeeeees.”

Kageyama had his fist up too, and they yelled together, staring at each other. Then there was a sound like a cannon, and every head turned to the other court. Yoshida had spiked from the middle, and by the look on the libero’s face, he considered himself lucky that he had not been near enough to try for it. Karasuno stood huffing and eyeing the ace, as he was patted on the back and smiled cheerfully at his team.

_That sound._

Hinata looked at the thick calves, the rippling thighs, toned arms, bouncy hair. He gritted his teeth.

 

The second years were sharing a room on the third floor of the dormitory. It was 9:30, and Kageyama was growing furious at the others for keeping him awake. _It’s some kind of miracle_ , he thought. _Dumbass is being the quietest one_.

Hinata was cross-legged on his mat, pressing his fists into his thighs, and squeezing his eyes shut with determination. _I’m a good friend. I’m not talking, I’m letting Kageyama sleep. I don’t need to talk. I don’t need to talk. I don’t need to—_

“—and he actually said that, didn’t he? Right out on the court.”

“No,” said Tsukishima, “He said ‘if it’s not me’, and the libero added the other part.”

“Right right, and then their captain was like—”

“Will you two shut up?”

“Sorry Kageyama.”

“Shut up Yamaguchi.”

“Sorry Tsuki.”

“I’m sure if you focus hard enough, King, you’ll be able to block out the noise,” Tsukishima said.

“I’ve tried that, sleeping doesn’t work that way!”

The pair laughed, and Hinata snorted into his arm. Then a short clunk sound made them all turn.

“What was that?”

“Something hit the window, wasn’t it?”

The noise came again.

“It was a rock, I saw it hit,” said Yamaguchi.

“Kageyama.” It was a half whisper, half call, coming from outside. Another small stone hit the window. “Kageyama. Come out and play.”

They were all looking at the setter now. Hinata leapt up and scampered to the window. Yoshida was standing below them, just bringing his arm back for another throw.

“How the heck did he find us?”

“Is it that Tsubaki ace?” said Yamaguchi. “I recognize his voice.”

“What does he want with the King?”

Hinata jumped away as another rock came flying. Then he reached and jerked the curtains closed.

“Ahh, come on Tobio-kun. Come out for a little night mischief, like a good high schooler.”

“This is embarrassing, King.”

“What’s he doing, Hinata, just standing down there?” Yamaguchi said.

“Hey Karasuno,” came the distant voice. “Toss down Kageyama-kun. You can spare him for a night.”

“Are you friends with him, Kageyama?” said Yamaguchi.

Hinata was kneeling stiffly on his mat, perfectly alert. His owl eyes watched Kageyama. The setter threw off his blanket and stomped to the window. He opened it.

“Hey,” he yelled. “Shut the hell up.”

He pushed the window shut and returned to his bed. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi choked on laughter. Hinata could only look.

“Nighty night, then,” the voice called.

Hinata lay down and turned to the wall. Even in the dark, he was afraid his smile would be obvious. And truly, its brightness beamed like a flashlight. Yamaguchi was still chuckling, and on top of being so happy, hearing his example made it hard for Hinata to check himself.

Kageyama sat up, about to let loose on the two. But then he heard, from his orange teammate, the softest giggle. To Kageyama, it didn’t sound like a noise a human would make.

“All of you shut up,” he said shortly, and laid back down.

 

The time came to face off with Yoshida’s team. Coach Ukai put their best blocker, Tsukishima, up against him. Hinata played with his shirt and swallowed down his arguments.

Tsukishima did his job well, making Hinata grumble from the sideline. Yoshida was hardly allowed to hit free. Karasuno took the first set. Hinata fidgeted furiously as Ukai spoke to the group. As soon as he had finished, the spiker’s hand shot into the air.

“Coach! Please!”

“What, what are you pleasing about?”

“I—I want to face him now! I want a turn! Please. I want to block against the ace.”

“Well, Tsukishima’s doing well, and I don’t know if you can compete with his strength.”

“I’m strong as Tsukishima! I think I am! I can do it.”

“Well—What the hell, it’s training camp. Give it a shot.”

“Yesss.”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes as Hinata bounded onto the court.

The redhead darted to his place at the net and put his hands up, even though the referees hadn’t started checking numbers yet. Yoshida was to his right. The ace smiled and moved closer.

“Hey there.”

Hinata turned away, chin high.

“You middle blockers are testing each other today, hm?”

Hinata jerked his head back, and burned him with his eyes.

“What’s the problem? Don’t like talking to opponents?”

He returned to glaring ahead.

“You seem like a little handful,” Yoshida said, still smiling. “Guess you must have some lion tamers on your team.”

“Hinata, show your back number,” Ennoshita called.

“Is that your natural hair color?”

His jaw clenched.

“People say I’m lucky because mine’s naturally curly. But I say it’s pretty cool if yours is bright like that, like you just walked out of the salon.”

Hinata turned, but the tension slid off his face as Kageyama walked up to the net.

“Knock it off.” Kageyama smacked the back of his head. “You’re psyching yourself out again.”

“Am not.”

“You are too.”

“Am not!”

Yoshida chuckled, and they both glared at him.

Karasuno served first. The toss was sent to Yoshida. Hinata pinned down his prey with his eyes, for a second too long. Yoshida smashed it through the space between he and Kageyama.

“Dammit…Sorry, I didn’t close the block.”

“No shit,” said Kageyama. “Focus on your technique, not on the hitter!”

“Okay, okay!”

The next toss was a wraparound just to Hinata’s left. His timing was a bit behind, and the ball went off his fingers and straight up. Yoshida landed and jumped again, ready to do a direct attack.

“Bring it again,” Hinata cried, leaping up. Yoshida’s face finally broke from its peaceful confidence.

“You have issues,” he said.

Hinata softened his hands and the ball bounced off them, in a nice arch behind him.

“Touch!”

Nishinoya slid in for the easy receive.

“Nice, Shoyo!”

Hinata was naturally annoying, but a slightly frazzled Kageyama noted that he could multiply his ability by ten when he was actually trying. Yoshida was mercilessly haunted by the sudden appearance of the little hands, flashing into his spike path at the very last moment, so that he couldn’t change course. He smacked ball after ball, harder, and harder still, but they were continually having their speed killed by those tiny, desperate hands.

“Touch!”

“Touch!”

“TOUCH!”

Because it was a team unfamiliar with them, the blockers were biting on most of Hinata’s fakes, and Ennoshita had a field day on the outside. Karasuno cruised to victory, by ten points in both sets. Nothing pleased Hinata more than to finish him off in a short time. He was also delighted by the fact that Yoshida’s number was eleven, which meant he had missed shaking his hand by one, and instead he would shake with the bastard Tsukishima.

“So many touches, Hinata, you were all over the place!” Kinoshita mussed his hair.

“You and Tsuki did really good against him,” said Yamaguchi.

“Oo, when you had that sweet spike down the line it totally fooled that bald guy, Yamaguchi—”

“Sho-chan, thanks a million.” Nishinoya offered a high five. “You make it a lot easier for the receivers to face a super ace when you can be up in his business like that.”

Hinata grinned.

“Hey,” said Kageyama. “We’ll be facing him again. So expect some adjustments on his side, don’t get complacent.”

“Of course not! I know.”

“Good blocking.” Kageyama gave a nod as he walked by.

Hinata bit his lip to stop the smile.

 

He struggled to fall asleep that night.

_I touched all but two of that guy’s spikes. But he touched some of mine too. He’s a really good jumper…Dammit…_

_He thinks Kageyama’s really cool. He was looking at him a lot, I saw it. And Kageyama knows he’s a cool ace._

_Urrrrrgh. I said I wouldn’t get mad anymore. Maybe that guy is someone Kageyama would like to be with. And I have to be cool with it. We’ll still be teammates, and probably friends, even if he does like Yoshida. And…_

_And even if Kageyama can’t call me the ace, even if he still calls me the decoy and even if I’m still middle blocker instead of outside like the Little Giant, that’s okay. Because I do everything I can for Kageyama, and so his team can win, and that’s all a person can ask for. And that’s what I give him, everything I can. Every day. Always._

“Hey. Hinata.”

Someone had touched his arm. He turned over instantly. Kageyama leaned away, a little surprised.

“Wha? What is it?”

“I’m running to the beach,” Kageyama said. “Come on.”

He got up. Hinata took a moment to notice the ball under his arm. Then he dove over to grab his shoes.

“Wait Kageyama!”

The moon was bright. Hinata jogged next to him, admiring the swishing bangs in any moment he could. There was a slow breeze chilling his bare arms and legs. He envied Kageyama’s sweatshirt. But on the whole, he was very pleased.

_Yesterday when that guy asked Kageyama to come out and play, he told him to shut up. But now Kageyama asked me to come out with him, even though it’s late and he likes to get lots of sleep. He must like me. A little bit. I knew it, I knew I could get him to like me!_

They got to the beach, an expanse of white. For a while they passed back and forth, while Hinata chattered about the nice sand and the pretty reflection on the water. Then Kageyama started throwing him tosses, and he spiked them over an imaginary net.

“You should train a lot in sand,” Kageyama said. “It’s good for you, physically and mentally.”

Hinata had just returned from chasing down the ball. He threw it back.

“Um, mentally?”

“It’s hard to jump in sand, right? In your head it seems like you’re struggling more. So the more times you jump when you think you’re struggling, and the more you train your body to push past your mental block, the easier it will be to jump when you’re tired in a match.”

“Ohh. That’s cool! I’ll do it whenever I can.”

“Here goes.”

Kageyama put up another toss. Hinata jumped. His eyes caught the sparkle of the watery moon, and for a second he lost sight of the ball. It flew off the side of his hand and out into the ocean.

“Ah crap!”

He sprinted for it.

“Hey! No! Stop, Hinata. Stop.”

Kageyama grabbed the back of his shirt, and he fell into the sand.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry, I’ll get it don’t worry Ka—“

“We can’t go out there, it’s too dark. That’s dangerous. Don’t you use your head ever?”

“But I can see it, it’s—way out there…”

The tide was washing the ball farther and farther from them. Kageyama sat down next to him. They watched the ball drifting away. Hinata flopped back off his knees and pouted to himself.

“Sorry. I’ll pay for a new one.”

“Shut up…”

Kageyama had one leg stretched out in front of him; the other was bent to his chest, with his arm resting on it. Hinata allowed himself only one glance.

“Hey Kageyama.”

“Hm.”

“When I was at your house that one time, I saw the pictures on your fridge. You’ve been lots of places, huh?”

“I guess.”

“You used to wear your hair shorter.”

“So?”

“Are you ever gonna do that again?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do you like it longer?” Hinata said.

“I don’t know.”

“I think I like it longer. But I guess maybe just because I’m used to it.”

“Has your hair always been like it is now?” said Kageyama.

“Yeah. Maybe that’s why people say I look like an elementary schooler, because I still have the same hair. I could get a different style.” He used the toe of his shoe to make circles in the sand. “That Yoshi’s hair is cool. Noya-san told me it’s called an undercut.”

“You wanna cut it like _that_?”

Hinata turned, frowning. “Well it’s cool on him. You don’t think I’d look cool with it?”

“I don’t know, dumbass. But it—It’s just weird to think about you with different hair.”

“Ohh. I see.”

“Do you think this is a fun camp?” Hinata said. “I mean, are you having fun.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah?”

Kageyama nodded once. “We wouldn’t get to do something like this at home.”

“Hm? Like what we’re doing right now? Just sitting around?”

“I mean playing volleyball by the ocean.”

“Oh. Yeah.”

“We do—this, all the time anyway.”

“Just sitting here?”

“Yeah.”

Hinata turned away. An unstoppable smile had crept onto his face. He shook his head, trying to get rid of it, but he was still thinking of Kageyama, and only smiled more. Then he started to laugh.

“What the hell—”

“You’re funny to sit around with.” Hinata gasped between giggles. “Because you’re still so serious. And we’re just sitting here!”

“Why are you laughing at that? You’re such a dumbass. Especially when we sit around, you’re a dumbass.”

Hinata fell sideways into the sand and laughed even more. When Kageyama punched him in the side, the giggles got worse. He had to crawl away to avoid any more contact.

When he was able to open his eyes again, the first thing he spotted was the ball. It had been washed back near the shore. Hinata took off.

“Hey!”

“Got it!” He dove into the receding tide, trapping the ball. He brought it back, with a big smile. “I got it. Here you go, Kageyama.”

Kageyama slapped it out of his hands.

“Now you’re all wet, moron. It’s winter, even if we are at the beach, you dumbass, so take your shirt off.”

He bent over and began pulling off his sweatshirt. Hinata was dumbfounded, but obeyed.

“You’re gonna get a cold and be miserable in the room for the rest of the week, and I’m not taking care of you, so put this on.”

He handed him the sweatshirt. Then he picked up the ball and jogged away. Hinata tugged on the piece of clothing. It was warm inside, from Kageyama’s heat, but he didn’t have time to think about that. He grabbed his wet shirt and ran after him.


	9. Define: Truth

Hinata spent the next morning chasing Nishinoya around the dormitory, because he had taken his last pair of clean underwear. Kageyama went to the gym with some of the others, but without his warmup partner. And before long, he found himself missing the camouflage that the bouncing redhead usually provided.

“Hey heeey, Kageyama.”

It was Yoshida, coming near him to pick up a loose ball. Kageyama continued to toss against the wall.

“We don’t get our rematch for another couple days, but I’m looking forward to it.”

“Don’t get your hopes too high,” Kageyama said.

He smirked. “Likewise.”

“Hey, do me a favor, scratch my back.” Yoshida moved closer to him. “I can’t reach, it’s right between my shoulder blades.”

Kageyama caught the ball and eyed him. “Your teammates are right over there.”

“But you’re right here.”

Kageyama walked away toward the door. He turned and called back to Yoshida. “Not anymore.”

Then Hinata entered the gym, and Kageyama’s scowl softened back to normal.

“Warm up with me,” he said.

They began. Hinata had seen the ace walking away, and peered shrewdly from behind his bangs.

“Are you making friends, Kageyama-kun?”

“Of course not.”

“Well you should. It doesn’t have to be that guy.”

“I already have friends here, I don’t need any more.”

“Do you like that guy?”

“I hate that guy.”

“Why?”

“He’s annoying.”

“Don’t you think everyone’s annoying?” Hinata said. “You say I’m annoying, do you hate me?”

“No.”

“Well why not? Because I’m on your team? Because I hit lots of tosses from you?”

“No.”

“Because you get to boss me around?”

“Never mind, I do hate you.”

Hinata stuck out his tongue. But then he wrinkled his nose and grinned.

 

The four teams were split up and mixed together for small group training. Hinata sat down to stretch with his new companions. He had Shijin’s setter, a spiker from Dateko, and—

“Hey hey, Shorty.” Yoshida sat next to him. “I’m feeling good today, hope you brought your A game.”

“I did,” he said, scooting sneakily away.

“This will be fun. But I was kind of hoping we’d have your setter.”

Hinata tried to fight off his surprise and look more intimidating. Then he took a breath.

“Yeah…Everyone wants tosses from Kageyama.”

“And anything else they can get, probably.” Yoshi was looking into the opposite corner of the gym. “His eyes have an incredible look to them.”

“Hm?”

“On a lot of people the eyes make or break the face. Photographers look for eyes like that, with a brow that’s naturally complimentary. And his color’s really something. Brown is brown, and blue is blue, but blue like that is striking and sharp, which is why they want it.”

Hinata had understood less than half of this, but he listened in quiet awe, with his heart thumping hard.

“Have you noticed how much better his posture gets when he steps onto the court?” said Yoshi. “He’s mostly defensive, but when he comes to the gym his pride is real. He’s more sure in his movements.”

“A—Yeah, I know. He puts his shoulders back more and looks people in the eye when he talks. And he—”

Hinata checked himself, and his eyes dropped their sparkle.

“He’s kind of hard to figure out,” said Yoshi, “Which people like, because it’s interesting. He’s proud, but there’s something vulnerable about him. Almost like he hates something about all this, something about what he has to do. And he’s obviously awkward, but cold too, so proud that he knows he is but doesn’t care. And ambitious to a fault, I think, because he’s not enough of a pleaser to pull that off.”

Hinata had been chewing on his lip, but he couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Um, that’s not really—it.”

Yoshida turned to look at him.

“Kageyama loves all of volleyball,” he said. “It’s just that he’s hard on himself, not patient at all and expects to get everything right right away. That’s why it seems like he’s not always strong and proud. He’s honest, and he wants everyone else to see the good and bad things just like he sees them. He doesn’t really get that no one can see you the same as you see yourself.”

“You’d know better than me. But he is pretty awkward, isn’t he?”

“Well, yeah, he’s bad at reading people and he doesn’t practice it enough. And he takes tough love way to seriously. But he’s not really cold, it’s more just that he wants to get to the point. And he’d never cheat, or do anything like that…”

The ace was smiling.

“That’s cool. Are you guys a thing?”

“What? What thing?”

“Are you together?”

“Well we go to the same school and are in the same club, so yeah, we’re together a lot—”

“No no,” Yoshi laughed. “Are you dating him?”

“What? No! We’re teammates.”

“Is that an excuse?”

“No.”

“He has all your attention.”

“Well I try to be a good friend! I _should_ pay attention and bother to learn stuff.”

Yoshida’s eyes were roaming his face, intently. Then his hand came up, and he brushed a finger across Hinata’s cheek. His thumb stopped under his eye. The redhead was frozen in surprise. A smile flinched on Yoshi’s face. Hinata frowned.

“Stop.”

Yoshi took his hand away “Sorry. It’s just that you’re awful cute. And he hasn’t gone for you yet. Maybe that’s not his type.”

“I—It’s not like that! How can I be Kageyama’s type, I’m his friend. You should mind your own business more. Just because you’re famous doesn’t mean you should get to know everything you want about everybody.”

Hinata got up and stomped off. But then he turned around and came back, with his head down. He bowed to the ace.

“Sorry. That was rude, I shouldn’t have said it.”

Then Hinata walked away, leaving Yoshi with a wrinkled brow and an amused smile. He shook his head.

 

That night the team piled into the third years’ room to hang out. Nishinoya and Tanaka had suggested a game of Truth or Dare, but the only ones brave enough to join them were Hinata, Narita, and Kinoshita. The rule was that the dares couldn’t take them outside the room, and their captain was otherwise keeping them in check as to appropriateness.

It was Nishinoya’s turn. Tanaka and Hinata catcalled and told him to bring it on, but the other two groaned.

“Narita-kun, truth or dare?”

He sat staring at the smiling libero. His eyes darted away and back. He bit hard on his lip. Noya kept smiling.

“I’m out.” Narita scooted out of the circle as the others booed him. The libero turned to Kinoshita next.

“Truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

His smile widened, and Kinoshita shrank back in spite of himself.

“Have you ever—sent a ‘sexy’ pic to your girlfriend?”

Kinoshita hung his head, and the room hummed with eager ‘ohhh’s.

He straightened up. “I’ve tried.”

Noya laughed the hardest.

“Show us the pose you did for her,” he said. “Dare you.”

Kinoshita refused the extra dare.

“Kay Ryuu, truth or dare?”

“Dare!”

“Tanaka. Too loud.”

“Dare me, Nishinoya, bring it on.”

“You got this, Tanaka-san,” said Hinata.

“I dare you to call Daichi-san, and seduce him for thirty seconds using your best girl voice.”

“But Noya! It’s late, Daichi-san hates being woken up—”

“Then you lose!”

“No! Never! I’ll do it. Who has a number he won’t recognize?”

One of the first years eagerly handed over his phone. Nishinoya dialed the number and passed it to Tanaka. He cleared his throat.

“Well hellooo, hot—stuff.”

There was a burst of snorting, and Noya went around punching them in the shoulders and hissing at them to hush up.

“Oh I know it is, but what’s time to me, when I’m not with you?”

“Shhh, Shoyo—” Noya jerked him away from Tanaka and shoved the redhead’s face down into a blanket.

“I’d just like a small favor. Tell me what you’re wearing, stud.”

“Ten more seconds,” Yamaguchi whispered. He started counting down on his fingers.

“Do you have a shirt on? Are you in shorts? I die every night about those thighs, Capta—I mean C-Cupcake.”

Then they heard Daichi clearly.

“Tanaka, I’ve heard that voice too many times, I know it’s you. Just because I’m not there doesn’t mean I don’t know where to find you—”

Yamaguchi’s last finger went down, and Tanaka dropped the phone with a yelp, before reaching to end the call. The room died laughing.

“Okay, Sho-chan. Truth or dare?”

Hinata matched his manic grin. “Dare, dare!”

“I dare you to kiss my ass.”

“Nooooo.” Hinata bowed in front of him, pressing his face into the floor.

“Five seconds. I’ll let you pick which cheek.”

Ennoshita put down his magazine. “The only ass kissing is going to be you begging me for a lesser punishment, Noya—”

“No, no, I have to do it!” Hinata’s eyes blazed. “Please, Captain. I can’t lose.”

“Fine, but let it be known that I looked out for your best interests.”

Hinata bowed. “Thank you for your concern.” He turned back to the libero. “Bring it!”

“All of you thank Shoyo for the glory you’re about to behold.” Nishinoya stood up and pulled down the back of his shorts. “Five seconds, count it Ryuu.”

Hinata closed his eyes as he leaned forward, but one opened a crack as he made contact with the left cheek.

“One. Two.”

“Come on, give it some love!” Noya said.

Hinata puckered farther and moved his head to the side.

“Five!” Tanaka finished.

As he was pulling away, the libero let one rip.

“Noya-san!”

He tackled him, and they struggled on the ground while Tanaka died, the first years giggled, and the rest grumbled.

“What a lovely example you set for your underclassmen,” Ennoshita said. He pulled the two apart, and announced the end of the game.

“Then let’s play something else,” said Nishinoya, pulling up his shorts. “We have to get you other people more involved.”

“Bloody knuckles anyone? Yamaguchi?”

“No, let’s play that lying game,” said Noya. “Where you have to guess which one’s BS. What’s that called again?”

“Two Lies, One Truth?” said Yamaguchi.

“Yeah, that! Who wants to play?”

Narita joined back in. Yamaguchi and Kageyama also accepted, and even three of the first years were willing to risk it. Nishinoya declared the category to be love life, which made for a few groans, but they all set to work typing their stories into their phones.

Tanaka’s were read to the room first.

“Number 1,” said Yamaguchi. “In my first year I got my butt slapped by Namame Kaori in the hallway.”

“That’s a lie,” said Noya. “He got hit by Daichi with the clipboard and told me to tell everyone she slapped him.”

“Dammit Noya!”

“Now you just gave yourself away,” said Narita.

“Number two. In junior high there was a cute brunette who liked me, but every time she would walk up to me to tell me, she’d get scared, start crying, and run away.”

“That could be true,” Hinata said.

“Lots of people are scared of Tanaka-san,” Kageyama agreed.

“But the cute girl seems too good to be true.”

“Yamaguchi, you little—”

“Read the other one, Yama.”

“Number three. I once told Kiyoko-san ‘Are you the manager? Because you’ve managed to steal my heart’. And she giggled.”

Hinata laughed.

“That’s true, the last one’s true,” Noya said. “Isn’t it, Ryuu?”

“How’d you know, bastard?”

“I was with you when you used it!”

“Dammit, that’s right. You were the one who made it up.”

“Yes, I was the cause of the blessed laughter of Shimizu.”

“I was there too,” said Narita. “It was more a snort than a giggle. And afterwards she said ‘that was terrible’.”

“But so terrible it was funny.”

“She didn’t even smile.”

They got all of the first years right, with considerable help from their classmates. Yamaguchi was a struggle, but in the end they managed a correct guess. Then it was Hinata’s turn. He handed his phone to the person next to him, and Narita read:

“Number one. I tried leaving a note to my crush with a poem on it, but I forgot to put the second piece of paper in with the first, so all the note said was ‘Roses are red, tofu makes me fart’. Wow, that’s awful. I don’t even want to know the end.”

“Definitely a Hinata thing to do,” Yamaguchi said.

“Hmm, Shoyo’s made a strong start. I can’t tell which it is.”

“Number two. I was waiting at a place in school that I knew my crush was going to come to. But my friend Koji came instead, to tell me my crush wasn’t coming, and I jumped out and kissed him before I realized who it was.”

“Ah, poor Hinata-san.”

“Don’t sympathize, first years! He’s playing us.”

“It could be true,” Kageyama said, “Since he’s always making mistakes.”

“Hey!”

“Number three. My mom told me when I was nine that the best way to say thank you is with a kiss. So at school when I got chocolates from 14 people on White Day I went around kissing all of them on the lips, then got in trouble and had my parents called.”

“Hinata always goes all out,” Tanaka said. “That’s totally something he would do.”

“But Koji is a specific,” said Yamaguchi, “And fourteen’s a number he could totally pull out of the air.”

“But if Hinata was going to make up a number, he’d pick ten,” Narita said. “We all know he wouldn’t be able to help himself.”

“So you think fourteen is a real number, and you think that’s the true one?”

Hinata was smiling, and eyeing Kageyama’s frown.

_Dumbass is always saying thank you. And it wouldn’t bother him a bit to kiss fourteen different people in a day, probably. He lives for all that shit you do with others._

“It’s the last one. True.”

“You think so, Kageyama?”

“Well that’s the majority, let’s just guess that one.”

“Is it the last one, Sho-chan?”

“Nope.”

“Ahh—”

“Dammit, which one’s true then?” said Noya

“Well the last one is true, only it wasn’t me, it was my sister who did that. The one with Koji is the truth.”

“You’re a dumbass.”

“Shut up Kageyama, it was just a mistake, anyone could’ve done it.”

“Those were all good stories,” Tanaka said. “You must be good at this game, Hinata.”

“It’s his smirking face,” said Nishinoya. “It distracts you from reading his eyes.”

“I know right?”

Narita went next, then Nishinoya. The team guessed both correctly, and last came Kageyama, the dark horse of the contest. No one knew how he would perform in a game related to social situations. Tanaka took his phone, and burst out laughing before he had even begun to speak.

“Wow, Kageyama. Number one, I went with my dad to a college game in Tokyo, and the cheerleaders came up to me afterwards and asked to take pictures with me—” He snorted several times before continuing. “Then they all wrote their phone numbers on my shirt, and left marks on it with their lipstick.”

Even Tsukishima was laughing.

“I think you’ve got this concept all wrong, Kageyama,” said Yamaguchi.

“Read the next one!” he said. “You guys don’t know.”

Hinata had smiled a little behind his hand, but he was thinking a lot about the fact that Kageyama had come up with something like that. He listened carefully to the next.

“Number two. I was getting ice cream on my thirteenth birthday, and as we left the pretty waitress came up to me and said I didn’t get my cherry on top, and she put the—” Tanaka laughed. “I can’t do this. Someone, take it, anyone.”

Several hands reached for the phone, including Hinata’s, but Yamaguchi came away with it.

“Okay. She came up to me and said I didn’t get my cherry on top. Then she put the stem in her teeth and bent down and put the cherry in my mouth—and kissed me—and walked away.”

“Pffff you seriously suck so bad at this!” Noya said.

Hinata laughed for real, but he felt a little squirmy and embarrassed. He hoped his cheeks weren’t getting red. Then, with a jolt, he noticed that Kageyama was blushing pretty badly.

“I do admire the detail,” said Narita.

“Yeah, that’d be a good way to throw us off it these weren’t so ridiculous,” said Tanaka. “So let’s hear the truth, I mean, the last one.”

Yamaguchi coughed away his last chuckle. “Number Three. In junior high I lost a bet with my teammates, and my punishment was to go up to Iwaizumi-san during practice and kiss him on the lips. So I did. He only hit me twice afterwards.”

“Wait, what?”

“Kageyama, you total moron,” said Nishinoya. “One of them has to be true!”

“One of them _is_ true,” he snapped.

“No way.”

“Well come on, we’ve got to make a guess,” Narita said.

“I kind of think the cheerleader one’s not true,” said Yamaguchi. “Because that seems like something you could make up easily.”

“None of them can be true,” said Tanaka. “At least not with Kageyama as part of the story.”

“Hey!”

“No, Ryuu, it’s true that he’s popular with the ladies. So one of them…is true.”

“I bet it’s the cherry one,” Hinata said. “I bet it is.”

“No there’s no way it’s that one, it’s too specific. He’s trying to throw us off,” Noya said.

“No no, it’s that one, I really think it is.”

“Well if it’s not the cherry and it’s not the cheerleaders,” said Narita, “Then we’ll have to guess the last one.”

“Yes, with the Seijoh ace!” said Noya. “It’s that one.”

“Do you think so, Yamaguchi?” Tanaka said.

“Well, maybe we should listen to Hinata, if he’s pretty sure.”

“I’m sure it’s the cherry one!”

“No way. Narita-kun?”

“Well, the last one mentions a person we know that Kageyama actually knows, so, maybe that is the most likely to be true?”

“It has to be the last one.”

“We’re guessing the last one!” said the libero.

“No. That’s wrong,” Kageyama said.

“Was it the cherry one?”

He nodded.

“I knew it was the second one, I told you, I told you, I knew it was because he got really red when you were reading that one!”

“Shoyo you dumbass why didn’t you say that?”

“Yeah if you would’ve said he was blushing we would’ve believed you.”

“I wasn’t blushing, idiots.”

“Why have you never told that story to us, why don’t you tell it to everybody?” Nishinoya said.

“Because it’s stupid and embarrassing.”

“No, really it’s impressive as f—”

“I think we’ve all learned enough about each other for one night,” said Ennoshita. “Beds everyone, go.”

Hinata was probably the least surprised at Kageyama’s truth. Of course his friend would get attention of that sort from strangers, looking like he did.

_And even if the cheerleader thing’s not true, it could happen one day, because I’m sure he’ll just keep getting better._

_Oh gosh, what’s Kageyama gonna look like when he’s 20? Am I ever gonna look older, like Kageyama and that Yoshi? What if I don’t get to be junior high age until college, and then I won’t look like a high schooler until I’m 40? I’m never gonna catch up to Kageyama!_

_But I guess I don’t care about that. I’d rather Kageyama look the way he looks and I look the way I look, it’s good the way it is. And I don’t want to compete with Yoshi about something I can’t get better at. There’s only one thing I can beat a guy like that in._

_We’re gonna play him again. I have to win._


	10. Define: Confidence

On the fifth day of camp Karasuno suffered a rare loss, to Dateko, and was subjected to a penalty of twenty-five wall jumps. This was nothing to Hinata, who could do them in his sleep, and his mind ran rapidly away from the task at hand.

_I wonder how high that guy’s vertical is. Man, if I had height like him, think of how easy it would be…I could see by myself. Kageyama wouldn’t have to worry about me so much. Yoshi would take me seriously. Everyone would take me seriously._

Ennoshita gathered them up and prepared to give his end of day thoughts, but paused when he realized Hinata hadn’t left the wall.

“Hinata, huddle up. Hey—”

“Wait,” said Kageyama. “Let’s see how long he can go.”

_I’m the Little Giant. I’m me. Yoshi can screw off, with his curly hair and cool shoes…I should get cool shoes…_

It took a lot of jumps to get Hinata breathing hard, and when he suddenly heard himself heaving, he stopped. He straightened out his burning back muscles. His shirt was soaked. He looked around, and flinched when he realized he was alone in the gym.

He heard a ball, and turned his head. Kageyama was at the back wall, hitting against it. Hinata leaned on his knees and watched, huffing. Then the setter noticed him.

“You stopped.” He came toward Hinata, looking up at the clock. “You’ve been going for twenty-five minutes.”

_What? Twenty-five...Can I go longer?_

_Can Yoshi do that?_

Hinata straightened up, looked at the clock, then back at him. “Why are you still here?”

“Someone had to time you.”

The redhead’s brow sank from curious to passive. Then he bowed, and his voice was solemn.

“Thank you for staying with me.”

Hinata headed outside, and Kageyama followed him.

“We probably missed dinner,” the taller boy said. “I bet there’s nothing left.”

Hinata started running.

“Wait, bastard!”

 

The rematch arrived.

“This is how we’ll start.” Ukai help up his board. “Yoshida will be here, so everyone needs to keep an eye on him.”

Karasuno charged onto the floor.

“Hinata-kun did so well against the ace last time,” Takeda said. “You don’t think it’s a good idea to have him face Yoshida again?”

“Mm. There’s something I don’t like about that matchup,” Ukai said. “I’ve been feeling it all week, something’s building up between Hinata and that ace. I’m not sure, but I think if they went head to head again, it might get out of control.”

Nishinoya subbed the redhead out of the back row, and the match began. Whenever the ace scored, there was a tongue click from Ukai, followed by an even louder one from Hinata. Tsubakihara hung around, only two or three points behind at any given moment, but the crows stole the first set 25-23. They huddled.

“Good job, Tsukishima,” said Ukai. “You’re still limiting him, even though he has made some adjustments since facing us last time.”

“Actually,” said Kageyama, “I think it’s the setter who’s doing most of the adjusting.”

“Ah, I agree. He’s putting the tosses up in spots that make it easier for Yoshi to go around our block. And he did score ten points in that set. If we take those points away, the game is no closer than it was last time. The ace is making up the difference today.”

“Should we maybe—” Kageyama looked at Hinata. “Switch things up?”

Their coach avoided eye contact. “Well…Tsukishima has earned another stab at him, if he wants it. So it’s your choice.”

“Oh no,” the blocker smirked, “I just couldn’t, knowing that Hinata’s dying for this chance. And I want to see how he’ll do, trying so hard not to let us down.”

“I won’t let anyone down,” Hinata said. “Never!”

Ukai smiled at him. “So prove it.”

The teams took the court. After a moment, Takeda realized that while Hinata was now in the front, the Tsubaki ace was not.

“Oh. Tsubakihara switched their rotation as well.”

“I suppose they assumed we’d do what we did last time, and put Hinata on him for the second set. So they rotated to keep him going against Tsukishima. This is probably for the best anyway,” Ukai said. “For both teams.”

Hinata did not see it that way. He stood at the net and glowered into the back row of the other side. Yoshi smiled, and waved at him.

In the second set, the famous ace finally hit his stride. Tsubaki took their first lead at 17-16, and commanded the game all the way up to 25-24. Then Tanaka scored. On the next play, Yoshi was finally shut out by the triple block. Now Karasuno had match point, and Hinata was heading in.

Tsukishima’s serve floated to their libero, who sent up a good receive. Tsubaki couldn’t afford a single mistake, and Hinata knew there was no way the toss could go to anyone but the ace. He had been late on Yoshi’s quick earlier in the game, so he tried to correct his timing.

But Yoshi was smiling, and Hinata knew that he was once again too late. The ball went off the edge of his hand and sailed into the wall.

“No!”

_Dammit._

“Don’t mind, Hinata, good touch.”

They were tied again. And it had been his last chance to block against the ace, who was now rotating into the back.

_Dammit, dammit…_

Yoshi’s jump serve was covered by Nishinoya, perfectly.

“Toss to me!”

 _Can’t to Hinata, they’re right on him already,_ Kageyama thought. _Try Yamaguchi, they’re not expecting that._

Yamaguchi’s spike was dug by Yoshi, but the pass was close to the net, and their middle went for a direct attack. Hinata jumped up.

“Touch!” He spun and rocketed back to prepare for his approach. “Bring it to me!”

_They’re waiting on the quick. An off-speed will work now. The one who’s best at that—_

“Ennoshita!”

The captain slapped it down the line. Their libero stuck out a wild arm. The ball popped up, and was coming back over.

“Chance ball—”

“KAGEYAMA.”

_Fine then! It was bad to wait this long, they’re pinning him down now. But…I’ve got you, just do the best you can. Hinata!_

Finally it came. The triple block was looming, but he could care less. He wound up, and ripped through with all his might.

Until the very last second.

“Feint?”

“It was a feint?”

“A FEINT!”

Tanaka was leading the charge toward him, but before anyone else could get there, Kageyama had smacked him hard on the back. Hinata turned to him, wide-eyed.

“Nice.”

Hinata laughed for joy. It made his setter frown, but then they were interrupted.

“Hinata, it’s your serve.”

He had broken the deuce. Now he was serving for match point. Hinata still smiled as the ball was tossed to him, and as he looked up at the net, and even as the whistle blew. Then his eyes focused in on Yoshida, and the joy disappeared. He exhaled.

Hinata tossed up the ball. He hit it, flicked his wrist, and felt it roll down his palm before it left. He watched its progress.

_I think it’s going right for him. Oh my gosh oh my gosh, I hit it where I wanted?_

The ball was spinning toward Yoshida. It dropped suddenly, and he lunged forward, but he was too late. The ball shanked off his knuckles and rolled under the net.

“Ace!”

“Yeeeees, Hinata!”

“Shoyoooo!”

Ukai stood up. “He did the top spin.”

“The one he’s been practicing?” Takeda said.

“Good job, Hinata!” Ukai grinned and gave him a thumbs up.

As they shook hands, Hinata looked to his right to glare at Yoshida. The ace looked at him, then at Kageyama, who was smirking over Hinata’s shoulder. Yoshi smiled.

“Good game, Kageyama.”

Hinata stiffened.

He jogged off the court with the others, but while their faces and shoulders bore the signs of a job well done, Hinata was all tension. Yachi held out his water bottle. He took it in a shaking hand, and threw it at the wall. His team startled.

“Woah woah woah.” Kinoshita picked up the bottle. “Take it easy, Hinata.”

“He’s just got too much energy still,” said Nishinoya. “I’ll play with you some more after dinner, Shoyo.”

“This kid doesn’t have an off switch,” Tanaka mumbled to the captain. Ennoshita shook his head.

“I don’t think that’s the problem this time.”

He approached Hinata, and the others gathered around.

“You’re really letting that guy get to you. What’s the problem?”

He clenched his fists and didn’t answer.

“We’ve beat him every time. You blocked against him and did really well. And you aced him just now.”

“And,” Yachi said, “You did score more points than him. Although, I didn’t think you cared about that.”

“What’s that guy matter, Shoyo?” Nishinoya said. “Because he’s a model or something? What’s that have to do with volleyball?”

“I don’t care who he is,” Hinata said.

But his expression didn’t change. And now, he was staring at Kageyama.

“We’re not gonna tell you you’re better than him,” said Ennoshita, “Because that’s not what matters. What matters is our team beat his.”

Kageyama nodded his agreement.

Hinata broke eye contact. “I’m fine.” He turned and started clearing up the bench.

As they left the gym, Tsukishima came up behind him.

“I always knew you had a jealous streak,” he murmured. “How entertaining to see it in full bloom.” He raised his voice. “But even if you are an eyesore, recognition from a famous ace isn’t easy to come by. He’s looking for talent, not determination and whatever else you claim to have. Not to mention, you can’t beat the King’s infamous past. So just give up on him noticing. Don’t you usually have fun at training camps?”

Hinata was giving him a blistering glare. But suddenly his brow softened, and his mouth crept into a dangerous half smile.

“That’s not it at all.”

He jogged ahead.

“Well anyway,” Tsukishima called, “You shouldn’t be jealous of the King. It’s trouble for those of us who are trying to cure his ego.”

Kageyama yelled over his shoulder. “I’m not too tired to fight you, you shit.”

 

It was their last night at camp, and Hinata’s turn for kitchen cleanup duty. Kageyama went to the gym to wait for him. Hinata came running and singing a song.

“The ace, the ace, I want to be the ace. The ace, the ace, the setter and his ace! The ace—Huh?”

Gym 1 was occupied, but not by his setter. The Dateko players looked at him.

“Sorry for the intrusion.” He backed away from the door. “Hmm.”

 _Didn’t he say Gym 1?_ He turned, and saw that Gym 3 also had lights on. So he sprinted down to it, and through the door, only to find that his teammate was not alone.

He was already giving tosses. To Yoshida.

“Whoo! That was a nice one, huh Kageyama.”

_No!_

He fell onto his kneepads, then his face. He wanted to cry, but at the moment he was too lost.

_It’s—over—_

He was defeated. The one advantage he had over the ace, the privilege of hitting Kageyama’s tosses, was now gone. Kageyama had been taken from him.

“Hey. What are you doing?”

The setter was standing over him. When Hinata looked up, his eyes were like glass about to break, and his mouth moved wordlessly, as if some hidden force was squeezing his throat shut. Kageyama frowned, grabbed Hinata’s arm, and drug him outside the gym.

“What’s the matter with you?”

Hinata had turned his back. He mumbled.

“What’s it like tossing to him?”

“Huh?”

He spun around. “What’s it like? Tossing to him. Is it more fun, because he’s stronger and smarter and taller? Does he make you wish you could trade? Do you want to toss to him instead? Well go ahead, because I don’t—Urgh!”

He kicked the side of the building. Then he turned away again and dropped into a crouch, covering his face with his hands. He intended to say ‘I don’t care.’ But what actually came out was the truth.

“I don’t want you to.”

“Kay, I’ll toss to you now,” Kageyama said. “So stop with the fit.”

“You don’t want to toss to me, you want—”

“Kageyama-kun…” Yoshida came out of the gym. “What’s the problem out here?”

He saw the redhead on the ground.

“Oh. The little ball of issues.”

Hinata stayed perfectly still.

“Well anyway, Kageyama, I brought you here by enticing you with volleyball, but I actually want to talk to you about something that’s not volleyball, if you’re willing to hear me out,” said Yoshida. “And I’ve heard you’re a pretty good guy, so I’m sure you are willing.”

Kageyama, however, was frowning. “What else would you wanna talk about?”

Yoshi laughed.

Hinata was staring through his fingers at the blurry ground. _This can’t be happening. Why now, why me? What did I do wrong? Was it because I got mad again? Uhhhhhh, is that why I have to be here and listen to this? Please, no, I don’t wanna hear—_

“Soo, long story short I’m kind of obsessed with you.” Yoshi chuckled. “You’re a babe, honestly, and the only reason I can come up with for why you’re not already dating someone is that you haven’t found anyone good enough. Aside from being who even knows how brilliant at setting, and aside from looking like some moody and mysterious porn star, that sexy-ass voice of yours has been driving me crazy all week. So I say we should go out. We can play lots of volleyball, and have some fun other ways. And make a lot of people jealous,” he laughed. Then his face got more serious.

“I can be good enough, if you’ll let me.”

Even though it was probably the longest declaration he had ever heard, Kageyama hadn’t been able to work out a response. He never in his life expected to get this kind of thing from a Playboy-type volleyball player. But as it turned out, he didn’t need his own voice this time.

“Hey!”

Hinata was standing next to Kageyama, tensed up as if he were going to spring, and glaring like a champion. He took two steps toward Yoshi, who took two steps back.

“ _I’m_ good enough. I’m Kageyama’s closest friend. But apparently that doesn’t matter to anyone, no one cares about friendship they think they can just ignore it and pretend like I don’t exist even though I’m always here with him, because having a boyfriend’s the only thing that matters. But guess what! I won’t let you ignore me, because I know Kageyama the best! I’m there all the time and I watch him more carefully than anyone else so I know the most about him, and only I can know what’s the best and that’s how I know that it’s me!

“I know the things Kageyama hates, and I know what embarrasses him and what annoys him and all the things he really really likes, and you don’t know any of it! Maybe if one of you would think about him for once instead of yourself, then you could figure out that maybe he’s not dating because he just doesn’t want to. Maybe he has other stuff that’s worth it to him and other things he cares about more than having a stupid date! Maybe if you’d actually try to figure him out like I try, if you actually tried to get to know him first, then you’d know like I do that he doesn’t like talking to strangers, he isn’t too proud to care about others’ feelings, and he doesn’t deserve for you to talk about him like he’s just some thing you can have and show off and do whatever you want with! And if you did try and you did see any of that, you’d realize that I am the best for Kageyama, even though I’m just his teammate and partner and _friend_! So back off!”

He wanted to cry even more than before, but everything had welled up in such a rush that he didn’t have the capacity to start. He didn’t know what he was looking at anymore, but it wasn’t Yoshida. That is, until he laughed.

“You really have a lot of problems, for someone so small. You’re like a little bundle of sensitive feelings. But I can’t argue with you. And since Kageyama didn’t interrupt, I assume that’s all there is to say.” He looked back and forth between them, smiling. “Friends, huh Shorty?”

Hinata said nothing. Yoshi was still smiling as he walked away.

“Have fun, you two. Train hard, and we’ll meet again at Nationals.”

Once it had dawned on Hinata that he was alone with his teammate, all courage seemed to flee him. He tried desperately to quiet his heavy breathing, but the huffing pounded distantly in his ears. He sucked in a long breath.

“Sorry.”

It came out even softer than he had feared.

“Hinata.”

He turned around. The setter was standing perfectly straight, fists at his sides, and looking at him.

“You’re my best friend,” Kageyama said.

Hinata stared.

“I knew that already, it wasn’t because you said all that stuff that I realized. But I just—didn’t think I needed to say it.”

He couldn’t move.

“Hey. He’s gone now, so…knock it off.”

Hinata thought it should hurt. With the kind of things he had said, the fact that Kageyama didn’t realize, or worse, had chosen to ignore it, should be painful. And calling him only a friend, Hinata thought because of that he should want to die. But Kageyama had not said ‘only a friend.’ He had said best friend. And that had lit a tiny, toasty, perfect glow inside him, which, at Kageyama’s next words, finally reached the surface.

“You wanna play now, or what?”

The smile blasted through his sealed stony mouth, through the boarded up windows of his eyes, through every crinkle around his cheeks and chin and nose.

“Yeaaaah!”

He threw up his fists and ran into the gym.

Despite his claims to know him best, Hinata could never have guessed what the setter was thinking at that moment.

_I bet my heart’s beating harder than his. I think I got turned on by that, or something. I feel weird…but good…_

Kageyama had missed the point, but it was because of that amazingly efficient distraction, his teammate. Total confidence, despite all his disadvantages. A stubborn disregard for the status of the offending person. And a special sort of purity in his boldness, that almost made it painful to watch. Hinata like that was his favorite Hinata. It wasn’t Kageyama’s fault that he could comprehend nothing but how proud he felt.


	11. Define: Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler Alert: Star Wars The Force Awakens

It was a big day. Hinata put on his uniform as properly as he could. This was not an actual preparation, but it made him feel as if he were prepared. He even ran his hand through his hair a few times, though he fully expected it to make no difference.

He came early in order to reserve one of the popular benches in front of the school, under the pleasant watch of the trees. A tall, very black haired boy approached the spot, moving as close to a shuffle as he was ever capable of. Hinata jumped up, then threw himself back down.

“Kageyama Kageyama. I need to talk to you.”

He stood at a distance. “It’s eight o’clock.”

Hinata grinned, then held up a milk. “You can have it if you sit down.”

He came forward, snatched it from him and sat.

“Kageyama, I want you to do something.”

“For you? Fat chance.”

“No not for me, for you.”

“What?”

“There’s a person—I want you to go on a date with.”

“Shut up.”

“No, I’m serious. I want you to.”

“If you want me to, it’s for you, not me. I’m not gonna do that, I’d never do that, and you better leave me alone or you’re going in the trash after this carton.”

“Kageyama you haven’t even listened to me! There’s this person that really likes you, and I—I think you’d really like them, if you went out with them. They’re—They seem like the kind of person you would like.”

“Before you were keeping people away from me, now you’re trying to set me up, what’s with that?”

“Because I didn’t like those people. Um, I mean, I didn’t think they were good people for you. But this person—will be good, if you just agree to meet them. Just one date.”

“Even if I had the slightest interest in doing that, I don’t have time. You of all people should know.”

He tossed his garbage into the bin as he stood up.

“No!” Hinata grabbed his sleeve. When Kageyama turned around with a vicious scowl, Hinata reached beside him and held up another milk. The setter returned to the bench.

“You do too have time. We have Wednesday off of school, and none of the clubs are allowed to practice. And I know you’re not gonna use the day to catch up on homework, so even if you play volleyball for eight hours and run for two, there’s still enough time for one date.”

“Well fine, but so what? I don’t want to, so I’m not going to,” Kageyama said.

“Why don’t you want to?”

“Because it’s stupid and a waste of time.”

“But if you actually liked the person wouldn’t it be fun and not a waste?”

“No, because the whole time I was with them I’d just be thinking about what I could be practicing and what other people are doing to get better while I’m being an idiot hanging out with them. And anyway, if this person likes me so much, why aren’t they asking me out instead of you trying to set us up?”

“Well—They know you’ve had lots of people confess to you, and they know none of those has ended well, so they wanted to try this instead.”

“They sound pretty weak, then.”

“They’re not!” Hinata punched his arm. “I wouldn’t set you up with someone like that. Why don’t you trust me that you’ll like them?”

“Well maybe you should’ve started by telling me _who it is_.”

Hinata stayed very still. The two things he wanted to do, he could not manage: to look at him, and to speak.

The bell rang. Kageyama got up.

“Wait! Kageyama!”

“Shut up.”

“Wait.”

The taller spun around, reaching out the familiar claw for his head. “Dumbass, I will—”

Hinata was holding out another carton.

“Want the last milk?”

Kageyama took it, put the straw in, and shoved it back into his hand.

“Grow, will you.”

Hinata slurped the milk as he watched him move away. Then he smiled.

“I’ll see you at lunch!”

 

He popped into Kageyama’s classroom as promised, and despite his consistent presence there, still managed to turn every head for half a moment.

“Kageyamaaaa. How’s it going?”

No answer. Hinata cocked his head and smiled, pressing teasingly close to his face.

“I’m good too, thanks for caring.”

He plopped down.

“Hey, you haven’t made any plans for Wednesday, have you?”

“No,” Kageyama said.

“Good.”

“I’m not—”

“You are! Just trust me this once Kageyama, that you’ll like them a lot and have fun and you’ll want to do it again. And again and again!”

“You’re gonna make me puke.”

He rolled his eyes. “I promise if it doesn’t go well I’ll never set you up again.”

“Not doing it.”

“Come on. You’ve never been on a date before, have you? So why not do it once just so you can say you did?”

“I don’t need to say I did. I don’t care that I haven’t.”

“But you’re in second year. People are gonna start making fun of you.”

“Let’s hear them try that. And you’ve never been on one either. So why do I have to.”

“B—Because…you’re different than me.”

Kageyama frowned at him.

“You’ll go, won’t you? Just for like an hour. And the person will meet you here, you don’t even have to leave town. And you can pick whatever time you want, although they’d prefer not the morning because it’s colder and they have to—If you have to walk to wherever you meet, it won’t be fun.”

“You haven’t said who they are.”

“I can’t say. It’s a blind date,” he smiled.

“No way. If you’re playing a joke it’s not funny, and if you’re serious it’s annoying. So stop.”

Hinata glared until he looked up.

“What?” he demanded. “You’re the worst, seriously. Why do you want me to go with them so badly, what’s in it for you? Are they your favorite thing ever, or what? Do you owe them something?”

“No. I just want you to go because I think you’ll have fun. And you’re my friend, so…I want you to have fun. And I know they’ll have fun too.”

“No they won’t.”

“Yes they will. I always do.”

Kageyama matched his steady eyes.

“I don’t want to,” he said finally. “So enough of it.”

Hinata sighed. “Kay.”

The redhead opened up his lunch, and frowned. There were two korokke patties. He glanced up. Kageyama was looking at them.

“Ohh,” Hinata said. “One of them’s for you, I bet.”

“Huh?”

“My mom made my lunch today, she must’ve put in an extra one for you. She knows you like the curry ones.”

He set the patty with the rest of Kageyama’s food.

“B—I’ve never met her. How would she know that?”

“Pf. I’ve mentioned you a few times.”

Kageyama took a bite of the korokke. His eyes mooned at the desktop. Then he turned them on his friend. Hinata was smirking through a mouthful and nodding his head.

“They’re homemade.”

Kageyama swallowed. “Hey.”

“Hm?”

“I think Amano-sensei and Fukuhara-sensei are doing it.”

“What?” he cried. He looked around the room at the people eyeing him, then leaned in and mumbled. “What are you saying, Kageyama, we’re in class.”

“I saw one of them go into the women’s restroom, and then the other one went in, and they came out a couple minutes later, one at a time again, and both of their faces were red. And Amano-sensei always wears her hair tight tied up—”

“Yeah—”

“And some of her hair was hanging down when she came out.”

“NAH AH!”

“Shhhhut the hell up, dumbass.”

“Wait, wait wait. I saw Amano and Fukuhara-sensei the other day, they were coming out of one of the clubrooms together, and it was really weird! Oh my gosh!”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously! But they’re not actually doing it here, are they?” he hissed. “This is where they work!”

“No you idiot. Just fooling around. Or maybe they are, I don’t know.”

“Ahhh.” He tugged at his hair. “We can’t tell anyone else about this.”

“I wasn’t the only one who saw them.”

“Well stop talking about it, talk about something else,” he chirped. “Or I’m gonna start laughing!”

He did. Kageyama kicked him under the desk, but didn’t do anything else to stop it. And though they hid behind his bangs, his eyes were on the redhead’s glee-contorted face.

 

The duo, Tanaka, and Nishinoya stayed at the gym the longest. As Kageyama was heading home, in the opposite direction from the rest of them, he heard the pattering of a familiar footstep. Today it was not unexpected.

“Hinata, I swear to—”

“Come on Kageyama!”

“Leave me alone.”

“This is serious, it’s not a joke. I wouldn’t play a joke on you that I thought would mess up your life or really embarrass you or make you lose focus on volleyball.”

“Well even you can’t make me lose focus, so that’s not the problem.”

“Please go on the date, Kageyama. This person will really be disappointed, they’re looking forward to it.”

“This person knows me and I’m not allowed to know who they are, that’s bullshit.”

“Kageyama-kuuun, please. I’ll even tell you everything you should do, so you don’t have to think of stuff. First you should take them to a movie. The new Star Wars is out and I know they really wanna see that. And then take them to eat, it doesn’t have to be a fancy place, just any place you like. And then if it’s going well, and you still wanna talk to them and hang out, you can walk around the park and look at all the cool lights they have in the trees. That doesn’t sound so bad, right?”

Kageyama hoisted his bag higher onto his shoulder and didn’t look at him. Hinata bit his lip for a split second.

“And, you could also ask them to play volleyball with you. They’ll be happy to, they told me so.”

“They like volleyball?”

“Um yes, would I ever set you up with someone who didn’t? I’m your friend!”

“But they can actually play volleyball?”

“Well they’re no genius, but _I_ think they’re pretty good.”

“Pf.”

“Hey!”

Kageyama didn’t notice how much his walking pace had slowed.

“Does this person talk a lot?” he said.

“Hmm. Well if you’re not talking, they’ll definitely have stuff to say. But if you wanna talk, they’ll definitely listen.”

“Is it a guy or a girl?”

“It’s a surprise.”

“What.”

“I mean I’m not gonna tell you. _They’re_ not a surprise. And you won’t have to pay for them, since it’s a set-up. You’ll each pay for your own half.”

“But what if I hate them? What if the date sucks? You should be punished since you’re the one pushing it.”

“So you’re actually thinking about it?” he shrieked. “You said what if. You said what if, does that mean you’re thinking about it?”

“Well since I have another whole day until Wednesday, and since you’re not gonna leave me alone for it unless I agree, and since I’m already about to kill you and since they don’t have volleyball in prison, I guess I have to.”

“You’re gonna go?”

“No more talking about it ever. Don’t ask me how it went. And don’t tell anyone else about it, or they’ll ask me.”

“A—But I have to ask one thing. A few things.”

Kageyama glared, but it was dull. Hinata flashed a grin and dropped it just as fast.

“Where do you wanna meet them, and what time?”

“Well we’re gonna play,” Kageyama said, “Even though we can’t use the gym. So if we do that in the morning, but not too early, and then we get something to eat after—We should probably do sit-ups and stuff like that too, so that’ll take more time…Wait, the park lights don’t come on until dark, so we’d have to go in the evening anyway. What times are they showing that movie?”

“There’s one at six,” Hinata said. “It’s two hours long.”

“Two hours? What the hell. There’s no way I’ll last that long, I don’t even know what it’s about.”

“You can always make out if it gets boring.” Hinata wore a smirk, endearing because it was half embarrassed.

“They don’t like me _that_ much, do they?”

He giggled. “I don’t know, I guess you’ll see.”

“I’ll meet them at six, then. You come to the playground in the morning to play.”

“Okay. It’ll be fun, Kageyama, you won’t regret it.”

“Too late. I’ve been doing that since the day I met you.”

“Hey, don’t say that!”

Hinata stopped, letting Kageyama go ahead of him. “Seriously,” he called. Then a wave of heat rolled across his face, and he turned and ran off. “Bye Kageyama.”

“Bye,” came the murmur that he didn’t hear.

 

On Wednesday, at fifteen minutes to six, Kageyama walked up to the front of the theater. And there on the sidewalk, unmistakable, was his red-haired teammate. Kageyama was glad his back was turned, so that he didn’t have to hide his surprise. They had parted less than two hours ago, after a whole day of playing and working out. And here he was again, now in jeans and a hooded jacket.

“Hey.”

Hinata turned at his voice, but after the period of recognition, he did not take on the look Kageyama had come to expect upon greetings from him. Right now he looked afraid, maybe even sick.

“What are you doing here?”

Hinata smiled. He opened his mouth, waited a long moment, and closed it again. He continued to smile.

“You didn’t think I’d show up? Now who’s the one not trusting people?”

“No, I knew you’d come,” he beamed.

“And I’m on time, so where’s this person?”

Hinata smiled at him again, but it was in a painful way, which did not make Kageyama feel good, and which Hinata did not look like he was enjoying.

“They’re not coming?”

“Well—”

“Did we get stood up or something?”

Hinata squirmed, twisting from side to side and clenching the front of his jacket. He kept his eyes on Kageyama, but tilted his head down in an attempt to hide more. Kageyama took an aggressive step at him.

“Hey, what the hell is this?”

He took no step away, but neither did he speak.

“Is there not—You dumbass. There is no other person, is there.”

Hinata’s face shifted again. Now he had staring eyes that threatened to shatter into pieces, and Kageyama had no idea why. It was making him even more irritated, not seeing the familiar expressions.

“Was this all just a joke? Or do you have something to prove? If you made a bet on this I’ll kill you. I’m sure it’s funny as hell to you and everyone else who’s watching—” he gestured around, “To see me show up for a date that’s not here.”

“No!” he cried. “I didn’t do that!”

“So you spent all that time bugging the shit out of me just to prove to yourself that you could make me agree? Or was it all an excuse, just to get me to hang out with you? Gosh you’re so annoying.”

“Wha—Ah—Well I—”

“Well you got what you wanted, I showed up, so let’s see this stupid movie.”

He marched toward the doors. Hinata stared after him.

_What? This can’t…be happening…Is he a total—complete—idiot?!_

“Kageyama, you dumbass!”

He ran into the theater, but was not expecting the downward slant from the door. He tripped and biffed it onto the carpet, receiving harsh burns on his chin and palms. Kageyama had him by his collar in an instant and was pulling him to the side. He put one hand on Hinata’s shoulder to steady him, and the other came up to the side of his head, fingers pushing through his hair.

“Did you hit your head?” he asked seriously. “Smack your chin?”

He bent over, his face closing in on Hinata’s.

“Do you feel dizzy?”

He was looking him hard in the eyes. And that was the last thing Hinata could handle right now.

“Are you—” he pushed him, “Kidding me? Are you my mom? Gosh, that’s so embarrassing.”

“Screw you, you’re the dumbass klutz who’s gonna get a concussion—”

They bickered as they moved up to the ticket counter.

“You’re paying for me, you pain in the ass.”

Hinata rolled his eyes, but did so. They went in, and after arguing for several minutes about the best place to sit, the redhead gave him an ultimatum.

“Well _I’m_ sitting in the front row, and you can come or not.”

He was surprised that Kageyama’s step did not hesitate even a second to follow his. The setter was still hissing in his ear, but the fact that he had come was distracting enough that Hinata didn’t heed him.

The previews started, and a plan.

_Okay, he doesn’t get it. That’s not so surprising, really, I probably would’ve expected that if I wasn’t so busy hoping instead of thinking. But anyway, he can only be so stupid, if I make it obvious enough even he’ll have to realize we’re…on a…_

Hinata found himself taking a deep breath, and he looked in fear to see if Kageyama had noticed. The setter was slouched in his seat, resting his chin in his hand as he looked up at the screen. Hinata swooned into the back of his seat. No wonder he couldn’t just tell Kageyama the truth. Kageyama with his hooded eyes and hard pout and dangerous brow. _It’s not…fair…_

But he shifted his eyes to Kageyama’s hand, which appeared harmless enough, the wrist hanging carelessly over the edge of the armrest. For one second the screen went black, and Hinata had to take his chance. He set his hand on top of the setter’s. His fingers flinched the tiniest bit into the edge of his palm.

He was certain that when Kageyama turned to him, his heart short-circuited.

“What is it?” Kageyama moved his free hand and grabbed Hinata’s, lifting it closer to his face to look. “You hurt it when you fell?”

He turned the hand over and looked at the inside. His other fingers were now busy feeling along the bones of Hinata’s wrist, pressing periodically.

“Where does it hurt?”

Hinata was torn precisely in half. He wanted to pull away as fast as he could, and use that hand to hide his face. He also wanted to have Kageyama’s cold fingers pressing and tracing on his hot skin forever.

“I—It’s nothing.”

Kageyama dropped his hand. His eyes had immediately tossed aside their regard for him, and now gazed robotically at the screen.

_He’s not even gonna ask why I did it. Because if he hears one time that it’s nothing, that’s always good enough for him. I guess I should be happy that he actually believes me…Come on, get serious! You have to do better than that, be more harsh and obvious. That’s how Kageyama is, that’s the only way to get through to him._

Hinata, though, was an honest fan of the franchise. The moment the logo came on screen, all thought of making a move flew from him.

Kageyama thought he was following the plot fairly well, until there was a collective gasp at the appearance of an old man and a hairy creature. Several times Hinata leaned forward in his seat, like he was waiting for something, and Kageyama would look uncertainly from him to the movie. When the girl character started climbing a hill, he wondered fleetingly if they were anywhere near the end. Now there was a hooded figure with its back to the camera. Hinata shrieked, along with a dozen other people. Then Kageyama felt him vibrating in the adjacent seat.

The figure removed his hood. Hinata’s face lit up, and in Kageyama’s eyes he was shining at the screen just as brightly as it shined at them.

Then Hinata’s jaw dropped, and his hands went to the sides of his face, clawing in agitation. The music swelled, and the credits came on.

“Awwww, no way! Oh my gosh they can’t end it like that, what the heck!”

He turned and grabbed his friend desperately by the shirt.

“CAN YOU BELIEVE THEY DID THAT?”

Kageyama didn’t yell at him, or even pull away. Volleyball was the only one thing that could make him anywhere near that excited. And for a moment he wondered what it was like to be Hinata. For a moment he wondered if he envied him.

 

As they walked out Hinata explained to him about the older characters.

“Why was everyone so excited by the old guy at the end?”

“I just _told_ you, because it’s Luke Skywalker! He’s the main guy, you know, from the first movies. You’ve heard of Luke Skywalker, haven’t you?”

He shrugged.

“Seriously? Urghhhhh. Well I was excited because he’s my favorite ever, I was waiting the whole time for him to show up. Who was your favorite character, Kageyama?”

“I liked the girl. Rey.”

“Yeah she was super super cool! When she flew the Falcon like that, and fought Kylo with her mind, and then with the lightsaber in the snow which was sweet—She’s badass. Noya-san would like her. Oh, wait.” He looked at him. “Did you like her because she was cute?”

He turned away, shrugging. “She was cute. But that’s not the only reason.”

“I see…She _was_ really cute. Makes me happy.” He wore a legitimate smile, with his eyes scrunched closed.

“Food would make me really happy,” said Kageyama.

“Me too, let’s eat let’s eat.”

They got dinner from a roadside stand, all wrapped up in plastic so they could eat it on the run; Hinata was too wound up to sit. Soon after they had thrown their trash, he spotted an ice cream parlor and gave a whoop that startled everyone in the vicinity.

“This place is so so good, I’ve only been there once since it’s pretty expensive but it is sooo good, you wanna get some?”

“Yeah.”

They went in, scooting into the booth nearest the door. It wasn’t busy, and a young, genuinely happy waitress brought them their menus within moments. She had soft pink lipstick and was pretty, which reminded Hinata. He propped his menu in front of him, and peered over it at Kageyama.

_Okay, they do this in all the movies so I’m pretty sure he’ll get the idea. He’s had to have seen at least one movie like that. Right?_

As he watched Kageyama yawn and scratch his chest, his head tilted doubtfully. But he still set down his menu, and sat on his hands to keep himself a little more still.

“It is pretty expensive,” he said. “You wanna get something to share? They let you do that, I remember my parents split theirs.”

“Yeah.”

The response froze him for a full second. He tried to recover a strong volume.

“Okay, what should we get?”

“Well even if I argue you’re still gonna get your way, apparently, so you just pick something.”

Hinata laughed. “Okay. Want a milkshake? Do you like them?”

“Chocolate.”

“Kay.”

The waitress came back. And when Hinata requested one milkshake and two straws, she paused a moment, before her mouth broke into a bright white smile.

“Okay, coming right up.”

She swept the menus off the table, still smiling. As they waited, Hinata drummed his fingers and looked around them. Suddenly he gasped.

“Kageyama! Kageyama is this the place you came for your thirteenth birthday? Like what you said at training camp when we were playing that game? Is this the place you got kissed?”

Something flickered in Kageyama’s eyes, and they slid down onto the table.

“Yeah.”

“Oh my goooosh that’s so weird, is it weird to come here again? Or do you come here a lot?”

“Not a lot.”

“Was that your first kiss, that day?”

“Wha—Well so what?”

“Well nothing, I was just wondering. How many other kisses have you gotten?”

Kageyama kept his look disinterested, but under the table he was crushing Hinata’s foot.

“It’s just a question! I’m just asking, just talking. Geez…” He pulled a napkin out of the holder and started to fold it with pretend focus. “Was it—Was it your only one?”

“Yeah.”

Hinata didn’t move, but his eyes darted up at the quick response. Kageyama had his chin in his hand, and was looking at him with no particular emotion in his face. Hinata sat back in the seat and dropped his hands. He smiled, and though he attempted to be as unreadable as Kageyama, there was some obvious shyness.

“Maybe it’s lucky. Maybe you’ll get your second kiss here too.”

“I’m not counting on it,” he said. “How many people have you kissed?”

“Hmm…I think four?”

Kageyama’s eyes narrowed. But their exchange was broken up the smiling waitress, who set down their shake and their two straws, and gave Hinata a wink as she left. Kageyama scowled at it, then reached out and smacked the side of his head.

“You don’t have to try so hard.”

“Oww, what?”

Kageyama was already unwrapping his straw. Hinata hurried to catch up, and his was about to follow Kageyama’s into the whipped cream topping when his eyes lit on the bright cherry.

“Hey do you want the cherry?”

“No.”

Hinata plucked it off the top. “Are you sure?”

He leaned forward, and the movement was enough to make Kageyama look up. Hinata was smiling. It looked fragile, because of the cherry stem held carefully between his teeth. One of Kageyama’s hands gripped hard on the table. With the other he reached and pulled the cherry out of his mouth.

“Dumbass Hinata.”

Kageyama went back to the ice cream, but heat lingered in his face. Hinata’s laugh was light and short. He did not know what he would have done if Kageyama had taken the bait, and in order to distract himself from the prospect, he pulled up with his elbows and stuck his straw into the shake. He hadn’t thought of drinking at the same time, but when he realized that he was, he acknowledged that that had been part of the plan. And his eyes, radiating the heat from his internal nerves, slid up his friend’s face.

Kageyama’s eyes moved and met his. They didn’t shy away.

But they were glaring. Then he realized Kageyama had started to slurp faster. He let go of his straw and bopped him on the forehead.

“What are you doing, idiot?”

“Hey don’t start contests if you can’t finish them,” Kageyama said.

With that, Hinata put his head down on the table and sulked. _This is so stupid. I am such an idiot, why can’t I just tell him? It’s so, so stupid…And I can’t believe I did the cherry thing, oh my goooosh…_

“You finish it, I’ll go pay.”

Kageyama was sliding the glass toward him, and getting out of the booth. Hinata pulled some crumpled money out of his pocket and gave it to him, then sat up to take the shake. By Kageyama’s standards, he had left a generous amount. And the chocolate was so thick in Hinata’s mouth that it almost made him forget his failure. Almost.

A few blocks brought them to the outskirts of the park, whose lattice archway was intertwined with lights. The trees spreading off from either side of it were also strung with the tiny round bulbs. They entered the park. When Hinata ventured his first glance, wanting to see how Kageyama looked in this lighting, he saw the other boy shaking his head.

“You planned a perfect day for yourself and then found a way to drag me along,” he said. “You think you can get everything you want, don’t you.”

Hinata bit back his first response. He frowned at the ground.

“No. I know I can’t.”

A palm smacked hard on the back of his head.

“Gah!”

“That’s no kind of attitude to have,” Kageyama said, with a sideways glare.

“What the heck are you talking about?”

“You can’t think like that. You’re not talented enough. For a person like you, you’re not going to get things unless you believe you’re going to get them. That’s the only way.”

“Well you don’t have to hit me and insult me to tell me that,” he said. “And you were making it sound like I’m a brat, so I was telling you I’m not.”

“Pf. For someone who’s not an only child, and not even the youngest, you’re a pretty big brat.”

“Shut—up.” He punched Kageyama’s gut and took off at a sprint down the path. Kageyama tore after him.

“I’m gonna—hurt you—Hinataaaa—”

He froze. The redhead had stopped in a clearing. The trees encircling the area were thickly strung with lights. Kageyama’s eyes went meek.

“Isn’t this spot cool? I found it earlier today.”

Hinata walked over to a certain tree and retrieved a volleyball from behind it.

“It’s smaller than the other spots they have for activities, but I thought this one’s light enough that we can play in the dark like this.”

And they played. When he tossed, Kageyama liked looking up at the black sky and the halo of lights around them.

“This is pretty cool,” he said.

They didn’t talk anymore, except for an occasional self-depreciating noise from Hinata. They had already critiqued for hours that day, and it was nice to just play. Hinata’s thoughts flittered from the movie, to the pretty lights and sky, to the pretty boy in front of him. He had forgotten about the date and the problems.

The setter’s mind was on technique, except for a few times that he wondered about Hinata being so quiet right now, and about him being afraid when they had first met up, and about a few of his smiles that had not reached his cheeks as much as they should.

Hinata caught the ball.

“Hey, could we be done now? I wanna ride home before it gets too late, and I get too tired.”

Kageyama nodded. They put on their jackets and returned to the path.

Hinata kept a step behind, so that he could look at Kageyama without being snapped at. The white glow sheened off his dark hair. When he blinked, a shine would flash across his eyes. Kageyama had one hand in his pocket, but the one on Hinata’s side hung free. That made him think of the earlier attempt, and his other failures.

_Stupid. It’s nice like this, without trying so hard. Like this we have fun. And…maybe that’s the best. If we have fun like this then it doesn’t need to change, and I should stop worrying and trying to change it. It’s good the way it is. And eventually I’ll stop being in love with him, and then there won’t be a problem anymore anyway. So I would’ve made him mad, and maybe even ruined it, for nothing._

It would take longer than a jaunt through the park to fully convince himself of this, but Hinata thought he had made a successful start in that direction. Just as he began to feel a little glow of approval for his progress, the newfound clarity was stirred back into a mess.

Hinata had locked his bike up just at the edge of the park. He turned right and walked behind Kageyama, headed toward it, while his teammate continued to go straight. Hinata paused his step to turn and throw a farewell, but then he saw that Kageyama’s progress had also stopped. He was still right next to him. Then Kageyama turned around, and he looked up at unreadable eyes.

“S…See ya,” Hinata said.

Kageyama reached out a hand. Hinata moved back on instinct, but the taller boy took an insistent step forward. He mussed his hair, for a single second, then turned and walked away.

“See you.”

He had not grabbed him, with the usual condescension or irritation. Kageyama had done the thing his other teammates did to Hinata more times than he could count. Except this was Kageyama. It was different, and now he had to figure out what it meant.

A quiet stream of curses ran through his head as he unlocked his bike. He swung his leg over, pushed on the peddle, and started yelling. It grew in volume as he sped away.


	12. Define: Confession

Hinata, as usual, was making conversation in the clubroom.

“What are you gonna do tonight, Tanaka-senpai?”

“Well well, funny you should ask. In fact, I’ve got myself a date.”

The whole room laughed, and while Tanaka was distracted with scolding them all, Hinata turned to his setter.

“What about you, Kageyama-san, what are you doing tonight?”

“My dad should be home from wherever he was. I guess I’ll talk to him.”

“You guess?” he laughed. “But it’s probably hard, since he has so much interesting stuff to say. You can talk about me, I’m the most interesting thing in your life.” He lolled his head to the side and scrunched his nose at him.

“I don’t get a break from you all day, as if I’d willingly bring you up at home.”

“Ouch.” Nishinoya patted his shoulder on the way by.

Chatting had caused Hinata to fall behind the others. Kageyama’s departure left him as the only second year, and soon after that the lingering pair of first years were gone. Now he found himself with only the captain, Narita, and Kinoshita. Hinata jumped.

They all had their arms folded, and from their respective places around the room, were scowling at him.

“Uh—Uhh, Kino-senpai…Narita-san?” He fumbled with the zipper on his bag. “C—Captain…”

He did not take his eyes off them as he wrestled his bag onto his shoulder.

“A—Uh—Goodnight senpais.”

He walked forward while still in his bow. When he did look up, he found his way blocked by Ennoshita.

“Hinata.”

Narita’s hand came onto his shoulder from the left. “Tell—”

Kinoshita gripped him on the right. “Him.”

“Waaah!”

He darted past them and banged open the door.

“Think it worked?”

“Let’s hope.”

“Doesn’t take much, does it.”

He ran around to the front of the school. His setter was just approaching the entrance columns.

“Kageyama!”

Hinata had stopped short of him, next to the benches.

“Hey, come over here. Let’s talk.”

“What?”

“I said let’s talk.” Hinata sat down. “Because we’re friends, and friends do that sometimes, you know? Just for a little, yeah?”

Kageyama stood clenching and unclenching the strap of his bag. “Do you have something you wanna talk about?”

“Hmm…Actually, yeah.”

Kageyama walked over and sat down on the other end of the bench.

“Since we’re best friends, I wanna tell you something.”

Kageyama turned away. Hinata let out a laugh, and leaned toward him.

“You should smile, and try to be encouraging, when I say that.”

He was poking at the corner of his mouth. Kageyama smacked his hand away.

“Just tell me.”

The redhead looked him in the eyes. His voice was steady, obviously determined to be so.

“I like someone. I’m in love with them.”

By the look on Kageyama’s face, that had been the very last thing he expected him to say. His wide eyes went down, frowned, and went back up.

“What?”

“I wanted someone to know, because it’s been a secret for a long time and it makes me nervous and annoyed. So now I told you and I know you won’t tell anyone else, right?”

“Why would you tell me, idiot? Why not tell the person you like?”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Well aside from it being _scary and hard_ to tell your crush you like them,” said Hinata, “I can’t because I’m already pretty sure this person doesn’t like me back. In that way.”

“Well then quit liking them, dumbass, and you won’t have to be nervous or whatever.”

“That’s not how crushes work, Kageyama. I would do that if I could.”

“We have the Spring Tournament soon, I don’t want you being all worried and distracted about something like this, it’s stupid.”

“This has been going on for a long time, and you haven’t noticed anything about me being weird. Have I been weird, hmm?”

He was thoughtful. “I guess not more than usual.”

“Hey! If I was it’s not like you’d notice. You don’t have time to think about other people, do you, King.”

Kageyama used his foot to shove him off the bench. Hinata was up in an instant and tackling him off the other end. They rolled through the grass, Kageyama trying to peel his arms off his waist, and Hinata trying not to let him. Once Kageyama had unknowingly rolled himself onto the bottom, the smaller let go and quick as a flash pinned his arms down. He smirked at him. Kageyama put his knees into Hinata’s chest and launched him some distance. They huffed.

“I was serious that you can’t tell anyone,” Hinata said. “You swear you’ll keep my secret. Swear.”

“Yeah.”

Then the redhead got thoughtful. He peeked at him.

“Kageyama, have you ever kept a secret before?”

He looked away. “Not—someone else’s…”

Hinata rested his elbow on his knee, and put his chin into his hand to hide his smiling. Then Kageyama got to his feet, and Hinata copied.

“So your dad came home? You’ll see him when you get there?”

“Yeah.” Kageyama picked up Hinata’s bag. He paused for a second, then held it out to him. “See you.”

He took the bag. “See you.”

Kageyama walked slowly away. He had never expected Hinata to say something that shocked him so much. That any of his teammates could say such a thing, that any of his teammates could be such a thing, had not remotely occurred to him. He could not begin to process the idea that Hinata was in love with someone.

 _In love with someone_. Kageyama could not see himself ever saying that. It was even slightly horrifying to consider. How could Hinata know that, how could he say it out loud? This was a kid he went to school with, played volleyball with, a kid who got excited about long movies and aces and going to the bathroom.

Suddenly Kageyama was turning around and walking back toward him.

Meanwhile, Hinata had turned his back and moved not an inch farther. He was taking determined breaths but not succeeding in calming his chest. Even though he had not technically confessed, the conversation felt like running a mile, and at the same time like having the sky lifted off his shoulders. He drug his hands down his face, until his fingers were pulling at the bottom of his eyelids.

“Hey.”

He spun around, heart revving back up. Kageyama glanced at him. Then he came closer, turned, and sat down on a bench. Hinata cocked his head, before quickly joining him.

“I don’t really get it.”

Hinata’s mouth puckered into an o.

“Like, you…How do you know that?”

“A—Oh.” Hinata swung his legs, watching his shoelaces bounce. “I guess I don’t really know.”

“Well—How long has it been?”

“Well I’ve liked them for like all of second year. But I’m not sure when I actually started—you know.”

Somehow it was worse this time, when he didn’t say it.

“But you’re still—sure you feel like that?”

“I’m definitely sure.”

Hinata was blushing now, and after glancing too long, Kageyama noticed it. Then the redhead caught his eye, and his head dropped too fast to be casual.

“I—I’m not embarrassed, really, it’s just I didn’t know you’d—care so much. No I mean, I didn’t know you’d ask many questions.”

“Well…if you didn’t want me to, you should’ve said.”

“No it’s okay, I don’t mind it. Guess it’s kind of a big deal sort of thing to tell someone, so…”

After no more than a second of silence, Kageyama got up.

“See you.”

“A—See you.”

This time he made it home, though not without telling himself a few times that it should be no big deal. But despite the parents, videos, magazines, and once he was really desperate, homework, Kageyama found himself thinking about the conversation. It kept drawing him back. He couldn’t figure out why.

_So he likes someone…So what? Of course I think it’s stupid and wish he wouldn’t, because he should be focusing on the club, but it’s his life and has nothing to do with me._

So then why couldn’t he fall asleep?

 

After Sunday’s practice, the duo happened to leave the clubroom at the same time. Kageyama thought it was fate being unkind to him. Hinata did not think so, because he had timed it.

“Do you have to go home now, Kageyama? Are you busy the rest of the day?”

“No.”

“So do you wanna talk again, like we did Friday?”

“Fine.”

“Let’s go to the same spot.”

He jogged ahead, and hopped over the back of a bench before taking his seat. Kageyama had a vision of his foot catching, his face smacking into the seat, and his puny arms snapping underneath him as he tried to break his fall. He sat down.

“Don’t do that again.”

“Huh? What?”

“You heard me.”

“Hey guess what, Kenma-san told me they had a practice match against Yoshi’s team. Neko beat them good, but Yoshi had a lot of points he said, like almost all of his team’s.”

“Let me see.” Kageyama tilted his phone. “11 in the first set, 12 in the second? The blockers weren’t doing their job at all.”

“He says right there they had trouble with his serving too, so it wasn’t all spikes.”

“Damn him. I want to play them again.”

“Yeah, me too!”

They were silent as Hinata responded to another message.

“I still don’t get it,” Kageyama said. “What you told me the other day.”

“Hm? What about it?”

“The person, you—like them like them. Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“So you wanna like—date them?”

“Well, yeah.”

“But you said you know they don’t like you. So why do you keep liking them and wanting to date them, why do you still hope for it? If all they are really is a pain in your ass.”

In spite of the bluntness, Hinata laughed. Kageyama looked at him.

“Well that’s probably because…I don’t just _like_ them anymore. And because...I’m around them a lot. So it’s hard to forget why I like them and try to stop when I keep seeing them over and over. And we even hang out just the two of us, so we sort of go on dates already. The only thing that’d really change would be that we’d—kiss, and do stuff like that.”

“Oh.”

Hinata pulled up his legs and crossed them under him.

“Why don’t you jump out and kiss them, like you used to?”

He laughed again. “What?”

“The story where you did it to someone else by mistake.”

“Ohhh, when I kissed Koji? That was in junior high, Kageyama, my first year, I wouldn’t do stuff like that now.”

“Why not? Wouldn’t that be the easiest thing?”

“Nooo, no no. With this person that would be—a really bad idea.”

Hinata covered his face with his hands. Kageyama could hear muffled giggles.

“Hey, when you said you kissed four people, was that counting the accident one?”

“Yeah. Was the cherry thing really the only kiss you’ve had?”

“I told you it was.”

“I know but I just asked if you were telling the truth.”

Quiet.

“You’re with this person a lot then. That’s what you said.”

“Mm hm.”

“So they’re fun?”

“Not really,” he smirked. “I always have fun with them, but they’re not really a fun person, like most people would say no. Sometimes I think they even try not to be.”

“Well why the hell do you like them then? What kind of person are they?”

Hinata leaned his head against his knee, and smiled at Kageyama.

“A really cool one.”

His happy eyes pulled away a little quickly after that. He reached down to tug at his shoelace. Kageyama scratched his neck.

“You told me you liked them. Are you gonna tell me who it is?”

“Mmm—Well not now.”

“Do you not trust me?”

“That’s not it.”

His eyes wandered away. “Kay.”

Kageyama wondered why he cared. He had asked the ‘who’ question only because he found that it bothered him when Hinata mentioned spending a lot of time with the person. He assumed it was only irritating because he didn’t know who Hinata was hanging out with so often, and as his best friend it seemed like he should have the answer to that question. So he had pushed, because he felt like he was failing at his job.

“Hey, how are you parents? Like, what are they busy with right now?”

Hinata was absently pouting out his bottom lip, as he waited. Kageyama turned away.

“My dad’s going to South Korea next. Their president’s giving him a tour of whatever city, since they want him to write good stuff about it.”

“Ah! That’s so cool!”

“It’s normal for him.”

“Oh yeah, I guess.” He was tapping his feet against the seat. “I like your parents. When I met them that time, that was cool.”

“Lots of people like them.”

“Yeah?”

He didn’t answer. “How are—home?”

“Home’s fine,” Hinata said, smiling into his knee. “My mom got promoted, so she’s busier but happier. My sister’s in school this year and she has lots of friends, they come over and have tea parties a lot.”

“Does she have more than you?”

“Tea parties?”

“Friends.”

“Oh. I don’t know, seems like she has a lot.”

“What’s her name again?”

“Natsu?”

“I never remember that,” he mumbled.

“Well she’s Hinata to you anyway, so, doesn’t really matter.”

“Oh. Yeah.”

“Hey, can you do a handstand?”

And just like that Hinata was off the bench, walking around behind it to the grass.

“I’m pretty out of practice, but I still can I bet.” He bent and popped his legs into the air. “I just don’t—have the conditioning—to do a long time.”

Kageyama watched for a moment, before joining him.

“I should be able to, as much as I use my arms.”

“So you’ve never—done one before?”

Kageyama took a quiet breath. He spread his hands in the grass, and focused in on them, visualizing. Then he kicked up his feet, took a few staggering steps, and stilled. Hinata let his legs fall, and spun on his knees to watch him.

“You’re doing it you’re doing it, on your first try and everything. Good job.”

“Shut up,” he grunted.

“But I showed you, so I’m senpai.”

Then Kageyama lowered himself into a push-up. He rose up, successful, and bent for another.

“Nah ah, Kageyama, I hate you!”

Hinata crawled over and gave his legs a shove. He tried to scurry away, but Kageyama got him around the ankle and yanked him onto his stomach. He hit him between the shoulder blades, and Hinata sunk into the grass.

“Aaaow. That’s gonna bruise.”

“It won’t.”

Kageyama returned to the bench and picked up his bag. Hinata sat up and turned to look at him.

“See you tomorrow.”

“Yeah.” Kageyama walked off.

 

Monday at lunch Hinata came to find him, but was stopped by the presence of another boy already standing at Kageyama’s desk. He knew what it meant, and backed out of the doorway to wait.

“Hey hey, Hina-chan.”

“Tanaka-san! What are you doing?”

“Just going to the bathroom. What are you standing around out here for? Don’t look so guilty, senseis are watching.”

“I’m not guilty, I’m just waiting. Kageyama’s getting confessed to.”

“Hmmm?” Tanaka looked inside. “Ahh, so he is, once again…A guy this time.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you know how old he is?”

“I think he might be in Yachi-san’s class.”

“Mm. Smart, and not a bad looking kid, either.”

Then Tanaka turned to him, frowning. Hinata shifted his attention, and raised his eyebrows.

“What is it?”

“Ah, nothing. Nothing. We’ll see you later.”

He smacked his shoulder and hurried down the hall, avoiding eye contact with the dean. Hinata peeked once more into the room, only to jump back as the boy in question approached the door. Hinata slipped in after he had passed.

“Hey Kageyama. Did that guy ask you out?”

“Were you spying, bastard?”

“No, I just saw he was talking to you, so did everyone else. He asked you?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you say yes?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

“Is the person you like dating anyone else?”

“Um—” He looked around at the other people in the room. “No, they’re not. But I don’t really wanna talk about that here.”

Kageyama stood up. “Let’s go someplace else then.”

“Huh? W—Where?”

“I don’t know, we’ll find someplace.”

“Uh, okay.”

He did not know why Kageyama would be so interested. It baffled him. But it was admittedly the ideal situation, since he had cheated like this, to have Kageyama forcing some truth out of him.

It was a beautiful day, and many students had sprawled on the grass to enjoy their break. Kageyama led him into the shade of the building, where they were alone. It was a while before he spoke up again.

“Will you tell me if it’s a girl or a guy?”

“Um…Yeah—I’ll tell you. It’s a guy.”

His eyes narrowed. “It is, seriously?”

“Yeah, what’s the big deal about that? If you don’t like guys that’s fine and everything, but you’re my friend you have to be okay with—Wait, are you—Are you not into guys?”

“No, I don’t care, it was just that I didn’t think it’d be a guy, for some reason.”

“What reason?”

“I don’t know. Don’t look at me like that again, like I’m ruining your life or something. It freaks me out.”

“What? Look at you how?”

“Like just now when you threw a fit.”

“I didn’t throw a fit, shut up.”

“You.”

They ate rapidly for a few seconds.

“What do you like about them?”

A smile broke his scowl. “Oh man, like a ton of stuff.”

“Yeah, what.”

“Well his eyes are a really cool color. And his hair’s smooth and shiny. Most people think he’s really—handsome, and like has a pretty face.”

“He’s hot?”

Hinata didn’t meet his eye. “Well, I think he is.”

“So you just like his looks?”

“No! No way! Those are just the easiest things to explain, that’s why I said those. I didn’t even start noticing what he looked like until after I noticed other stuff.”

“Stuff like what?”

“Like everything. He’s smart about things I wish I could be smart about. And he’s super talented and good at everything, which makes me really mad sometimes but mostly I’m happy and proud of him. And he doesn’t get nervous about stuff, which I’m jealous of, and a lot of the time he intimidates me but it doesn’t make me too scared, it only makes me do better. I like how he always does what he says he will. I even like him when he’s all pouty, because he’s so cool all the time and it’s good to see him not be for once. And I really like his pouty face, it’s really cute.”

When he looked at him again, Kageyama was leaning his head against his knuckles and glaring, almost to the point of rolling his eyes.

“Is there anything you don’t like?”

He snorted. “Oh yeah. He refuses to admit that I’m better at some things, he pretends not to notice when I’m having a bad day or upset about something, and he’s really dumb about any kind of flirting stuff. He doesn’t notice at all when I try.”

“If you’re gonna flirt with him and be all—embarrassing, why don’t you just tell him you like him, you idiot.”

“I told you, I’m scared.”

“Because you’re a wimp.”

“I am not! I just…” He huffed and dropped his chin into his hand. “If I tell him, and then he doesn’t wanna go out, it’ll mess everything up. Because he’s the kind of person that will freak out, and he’ll think it’s weird then and try to avoid me, and he’ll be mad because it will be a distraction that he’s worrying about.”

“Well if he can’t deal with it then that’s his problem, not yours anymore, and you can stop freaking out.”

“I don’t want it to be his problem, you idiot. I like him, so why would I want him to be mad or feel weird?”

Hinata became very absorbed in his lunch then, and Kageyama did the same. Eventually the redhead glanced at their surroundings. Then he choked.

“What are you doing dumbass, don’t mess around when you’re—”

“Look,” he sputtered, “Look. Look Kageyama.”

He was pointing to two women, walking side by side toward the front of the school. The only place they could have come from was the storage shed. They didn’t talk, and didn’t seem to notice the students. One of Fukuhara’s sleeves had come unrolled. Amano had a piece of hair stuck to her flushed face.

Kageyama turned with wide eyes. Hinata looked back at him, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. Then he burst out laughing, bent double over his lunch.

“Oh my gosh oh my gosh, no waaay…”

Kageyama snorted into his hand. Hinata paused. The smile was still on his face, and his chest still hiccupped, but his eyes were lit and locked on his friend. For a second. Then he crumpled again.

“Ahhhhhaha, I can’t believe this! So embarrassing!”

He lay on his side giggling. Kageyama smirked and shook his head.


	13. Define: Give Up

“Kageyamaaaaa.”

Hinata was chasing him to the front of the school. Practice had run late, and it was so dark by now that they could only see the black silhouette of one another.

“Stop running around. We can’t see a damn thing, are you an idiot?”

“Can we talk today?” Hinata said. “I have something important I want to ask you about.”

“Actually important, or about your personal life?”

“Uh! That is so mean!”

As their eyes adjusted, they were able to make out more of each other’s expressions. Kageyama looked stonily at him, then moved without a word to a bench. Hinata smiled and hopped onto it, sitting on the top of the backrest and leaning into his knees to be at eye level with him.

“Okay. This is serious. About my crush.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m thinking about…if maybe I should give up on it. On them.”

“You should.”

“Huh?”

“You should.”

“Well just wait, I have to tell you about why I’m thinking that, you’re supposed to listen to all my facts and then help me decide.”

“If it’s been forever and nothing’s changed, what’s the point of keeping it up?”

“Well just listen, and I’ll explain to you.”

“I’m not listening to anything until you get down from there.”

“Why? This makes you nervous? Geez, I’m just sitting here, you’re so paranoid.”

But he plopped down next to him, nearer than Kageyama could remember him being when they sat here before. He leaned away, but it didn’t change the fact that their hips were almost touching.

“Okay, so. Like you said, it’s been going on a long time and nothing’s changed. But because it’s been going on a long time, that’s one of the reasons why I don’t want to just give up on it. I feel like I’ve wasted all that time, then.”

“You _have_ wasted all that time.”

“No, only if I give him up. If I keep liking him then all that’s just good times we’ve had and times I’ve been happy thinking about him.”

“You said it makes you nervous and annoyed. Then how can it make you happy?”

“Well I’m only nervous and annoyed _because_ I’m happy. Like, it makes me so happy being with him and that’s why I want to be with him more, but when I can’t that’s why I get annoyed.”

“Well if he makes you happy, isn’t that it then? Isn’t that the whole point of looking for someone?”

Hinata stared at him for a long moment, then turned to play with his shirt.

“I don’t know. Lots of people can make you happy, but there’s supposed to be only one person who makes you happy like that. And if he doesn’t know—If he doesn’t think I’m that person for him, then am I just getting too excited and am I making a mistake?”

“Lots of people don’t make me happy. A lot of people annoy me. So if I found a person—I…I’d probably know it.” He scowled at himself. “But you, you’re happy with a lot of people, so you could be making a mistake. But I don’t know.”

He turned, and saw that Hinata was watching him with that special laser-like attention. His eyes seemed to display everything, as if the very words were stirring his brown irises, as if his thinking and processing were right there for Kageyama to see. Hinata looked away, resting his elbow on his knee and his chin in his hand.

“I’ve had other crushes before, but those were actual crushes. You know, like for a few weeks or a month you’re super excited and secretly finding out more about them, and you try to go to the places you know they’ll be just to see them for a little bit. But I figured because this one’s lasted so long, and for so long I’ve been excited to see him and fluttery in my stomach when I talk to him, I thought that meant it was different with this person.”

Kageyama sat up straight. “This is stupid, asking me. All there is to it is you do what you want to do. So just answer the question, do you want to keep liking them or do you want to give up?”

“I don’t knooow.” He pressed his face into his lap. “I think about if I let him go, that would mean I could start liking someone else. And that’d be nice. But then I change my mind about that, and I don’t think it’d be nice. I don’t really want to like anyone else. That’s what it…seems like.”

Then he sat bolt upright. He turned and latched onto Kageyama’s arm.

“That’s it! That’s why I’m scared to tell him! Because I don’t want to stop liking him, and if I tell him and he doesn’t like me then I’ll feel like I have to stop, and I don’t wanna do that! Kageyama what should I do?”

“You should let—go.” He tore his arm away, and stood up. “Why are you asking me this? Did you come to me because I’m your friend? And I’m supposed to want to help you and want you to make the right choice, because of that?”

“Wh—Yeah…”

“Then as your friend, let me ask you some questions. And if I don’t like the answers, then as your friend I’ll tell you what I think’s the best thing to do.”

“Yes! That sounds good, ask me some questions!”

Hinata had his hands between his knees, leaning overtop his arms and radiating at him. Kageyama's brow was firm, and he put his hands in his pockets.

“When you try to flirt with him, and he doesn’t catch on, does that make you feel bad? Do you feel stupid?”

“Yeah,” he said to the ground. “If I’m not feeling happy, pretty much the rest of the time I’m feeling stupid.”

“Has he ever said anything about liking you?”

“Well he never says much about anything, really. He’s—not a talker.”

“Then has he ever done anything that made you think maybe he liked you that way?”

Hinata looked at him. “Um—” He turned back away. “Well I thought so, a couple times, but that might just be because I was trying hard to believe that he liked me. Right?”

“Has he dated or liked anyone else the whole time you’ve liked him?”

“No.”

Kageyama didn’t mean to pause before his next question, but he did, and it made the redhead look up.

“Have you ever cried over him?”

For the first time, Hinata smiled. He looked again at his lap.

“I haven’t in a while.”

It threw Kageyama completely for a loop. If anything, this had been his softest spoken and most serious question. And now his friend chose to smile, a velvety little smirk that made him look much younger, and made Kageyama cold and knotted up in his stomach.

“Kageyama.”

He noticed with a start that Hinata had stood up.

“I know what to do now. I’ll give up on him. I’ll do my very best to stop liking him, because I swore that I’d do whatever I could to make him happy, and this is the best thing I can do.”

There was something about his look that Kageyama didn’t like. But he nodded.

“Good.”

When Kageyama turned away, he felt a small, intense heat in his chest, like something there had been satisfied. But there was also pressure, like something else wanted to claw its way out.

When Hinata turned away, an ache expanded inside him, and the sensation was that of having the heat sucked from his body. He felt like something had been pulled from his chest, and if he couldn’t get it back, which he suspected was the case, he was going to have to learn to live without it.

 

Hinata came to eat with him about four times each week. So it was much more likely than not that he would come today, on the day Kageyama had something for him. But he waited for ten minutes, then fifteen minutes, and Hinata did not come. Now it was Kageyama’s turn to go find him.

This proved more difficult than he had expected. The redhead was not in any of the Class 1 rooms, and Kageyama only happened to be passing by Class 5 when he saw him there. Hinata was having lunch with Yachi and a few of her girl friends. Before Kageyama could decide whether to go in, Hinata had seen him, and was up and weaving toward the door.

“Hey Kageyama-kun, what are you doing here?”

His menacing expression made Hinata back up, and bump into the doorframe.

“You—wanna fight?”

Kageyama ignored him and unwrapped his lunch. He pulled out an onigiri and held it out to Hinata.

“I told my mom about your mom packing extras, and she didn’t want to be outdone, so she sent it with me to give to you.”

“A—Oh. T—Thanks, Kageyama.” He took the rice ball. “Tell her thank you too.”

“Yeah.”

“You can eat in here with us,” Hinata said.

He turned away. “I’m done already. See you.”

“See you…”

 

They had had a Saturday afternoon practice, and now only four were left in the clubroom. Ennoshita and Kinoshita changed on one side, and Kageyama and Hinata packed up on the other.

“Hey Kageyama.”

“Hm.”

“Which of your parents do you look like?”

“Neither. That’s what my relatives say, anyway.”

“Huh. You don’t even look a little bit like them?”

“Apparently not. Do you?”

“Well my mom says I look a lot like her, but I got this hair from my dad.”

They walked out.

“My mom hoped we _wouldn’t_ get this hair, because she doesn’t like it on him, but she says it looks cute on me and Natsu.”

“Yeah.” He froze, cursing in his head. “A—She says that?”

“Yeah, but don’t all parents have to say that about their kids?”

“I guess.”

Then Hinata looked wearily at him, and moved farther away.

“Ah, I’m just getting my bike, I’m not following you.”

They were almost to the benches now. The setter stalled his pace. They had not talked here for a few days, and Hinata had not been to see him the last two lunch breaks. Kageyama refused to believe he was lonely, so he called himself deprived, though that made him feel nearly as stupid. Even so, he intended to ease his discomfort, so he spoke up.

“My mom likes you.”

“Hm? She does?” Hinata said.

“She thinks you’re—I don’t know, she just likes you. Since you came to my house, she asks about you sometimes.”

“Oh, I see. Wait, it’s not because—because I was rude or too loud or was causing trouble for her that time, is it?”

“No, I said dumbass, she liked you.”

“Oh okay. That’s nice! I really like her too.” He smiled with closed eyes.

“Yeah…Hey, you—” He glanced, then mumbled. “You wanna do me a favor?”

“Sure! Sure I’ll do you a favor.”

“Well she’s home today, and she’s not usually because she’s busy meeting people for dinners and all this stuff in the evenings. Anyway she’d like it if you came by to see her, she likes talking to people and getting visitors and all that. If you’re not busy now, you could come.”

“Ohh. Um…”

Kageyama had to look at him, because the change in attitude had been instant and completely unexpected. Hinata was rubbing at a hole in his tshirt and chewing on his bottom lip.

“But—if I come when she’s not expecting me or didn’t ask me, won’t that be pretty rude? She might be busy, if she hasn’t been home much.”

“Just say no if you don’t want to.” Kageyama turned from him and started to leave. Hinata reached out but didn’t touch him. With wide eyes he watched him walk.

“Ahh—Well—I love visiting people, and I really like your mom—So I’d like to if you don’t think it’ll bug her—”

“It won’t.”

“A—And I’ll just stay for a little bit, just to talk for a little bit, I won’t bother her long.”

“Whatever. She doesn’t care.”

“Okay! I’ll just leave my bike here and come back for it.”

He hopped up next to him and attempted to match strides with the taller boy.

“Now I’m excited! I like your mom a lot, she’s sort of like my mom but different. Is your dad gonna be there too?”

“He’s still in Korea.”

“Oh cool, cool. Hey Kageyama? Why’d you ask for a favor? How is this a favor to you?”

His step faltered. “Well—She’s an okay mom…”

“Gaaah? Wa—You—So you’re trying to do something nice for your mom?”

Hinata’s eyebrows had shot up under his hair as he stared open-mouthed at him. Kageyama didn’t respond.

“Well that’s—really—nice…”

He turned away, hunching his shoulders before he put his hands over his mouth. He was smiling in admiration, but his eyes winced. _He just made it harder, like a hundred times harder! Ahhh, why did I agree to go with him…_

“So, anyway…Has your house changed any since I was there?”

“My mom’s always changing stuff.”

“Oh, why is that? Because she likes change?”

“She sells houses, so she’s always looking around other people’s and getting magazines about decorating and seeing stuff she wants to try in our house. So she paints and hangs up new stuff and rearranges all the time.”

“Oo, that sounds fun! I’d like to have new stuff to look at all the time. Your mom’s cool.”

They went one block without talking, as Hinata hummed and kicked a rock.

“What’s with you, Kageyama? When we’re alone you usually ask about my crush. Aren’t you gonna?”

“Seems like you get nervous when I do.”

“Wha? Noo, you dummy Kageyama, you’re imagining that.”

“I thought you were giving up, anyway.”

“I am. I’ve been trying.”

“How’s that going.”

“Uhh, well, I’ve been hanging out with them a little bit less. And I haven’t texted them in three whole days, even though I wanted to.”

“Pf.”

Hinata scowled, but Kageyama didn’t look.

_If you’re hanging with them less, shouldn’t you be hanging out with me more?_

“Do you—Do you think it’d be easier if he started liking someone, and told me about it?” Hinata said. “Would that make me like him less? Or do you think that’d just hurt my feelings bad and make me want—want him more?”

“How should I know? But if this guy hasn’t liked anyone this whole year, and he hasn’t said anything about liking you, then he must not be interested in that sort of thing. So that should be enough of a reason for you to let it go.”

“Yeah…Yeah, you’re right.”

“I know.”

Hinata stared ahead and squeezed his hands together behind his back. Kageyama was still looking at him when he turned his face back up.

“Hey Kageyama. Can I ask a question about you?”

“Yeah, what.”

“You said I was dumb for not telling the person. So, if you liked someone, you’d tell them, right?” His eyes didn’t have the strength to burn; they only flickered.

“I—Yeah. But only if I was sure.”

“Yeah. Right…” Hinata’s head was down. He made a quick swipe at the wet corner of his eye, and tried to breathe deeply but quietly.

Kageyama was turning right.

“We’re almost there. You don’t have to freak out, but you better act happier than this.”

“We’re here already? I thought your house was farther than that.”

“No.”

“But I haven’t had time to—prepare! Now I’m nervous!”

“You’re kidding, right? You’ve met her before. This isn’t supposed to be a big deal.”

“I know I know, but I just didn’t get to think of things to say.”

“Since when do you think before you say anything.”

“Urrh, you’re lucky we’re so close to your house—Why’s the door open? Oh my gosh what the heck, did something happen to your mom? Did you get robbed? Oh my gosh!”

“She propped it open, idiot. Because it’s nice out.”

“A—Ohhh. Right. The door’s always closed at my house ‘cause we live outside town and there’s trees and it’s all kind of creepy—”

“Tobiooo, you have Hinata with you, how exciting!”

His mom was smiling broadly and waving from the doorway.

“Damn, she already saw us,” he muttered.

“Ah, don’t worry, it was still a good surprise. She seems surprised, right?”

They approached the house, Hinata tailing behind with light steps.

“I should really be kicking you out,” his mom said, “Since it’s so beautiful today. But since you have a guest I’ll invite you in. Nice to see you again, Hinata, how are you?”

She shook his hand with both of hers.

“I’m good. Nice to see you, I’ve been wanting to. But sorry for the intrusion, I know you weren’t expecting me.”

“Oh that doesn’t matter at all. We always welcome familiar faces, especially yours.”

“Thank you very much!”

Kageyama slid past them before he could get the urge to throw up. They followed him inside, and his mom went down the hall and into a room. Kageyama dropped his bag at the foot of the stairs, and Hinata hesitated before doing the same. He followed Kageyama into the kitchen. His mom turned from the fridge and seemed surprised to see Kageyama take a seat at the table. Hinata hovered near the doorway.

“Did you want snacks, Tobio? I just started dinner, it’ll be ready in about half an hour.” She turned to the other boy. “What brings you here, Hinata, are you boys hanging out, or did Tobio invite you to dinner?”

“Oh no, I’m just—I just came to see you, because I wanted to.”

“To see me? That’s so thoughtful of you, Hinata-kun.”

“It was Kageyama’s idea,” he smiled.

“Well, Tobio—”

She had put her hand on her son’s shoulder, but his look warned her off. She gave him an impatient smile, and turned back to Hinata.

“Come sit down.”

Hinata smiled to himself. She phrased most things as a command, like Kageyama did, though with a different tone. He took the chair next to his friend’s. Kageyama’s mother stayed near the stove.

“How’s school, Hinata?”

“Good.”

“And how’s your volleyball club?” she smirked.

“Really good! Today I came to practice early with Kageyama, so we played for almost five hours!”

“Mm hm. We always knew if Tobio ever found somebody willing to do that, he’d make sure he kept them around.”

Hinata glanced at him. Kageyama kept his chin in his hand and his eyes on the table.

“Do you talk about volleyball a lot in your family?” Hinata said. “Do you like it as much as Kageyama does?”

“Nowhere near,” she said. “But when it’s the only thing that can get your son talking, the conversation ends up going there a lot.”

Hinata smiled and scrunched his nose a little at his friend, who glanced at him.

“Tobio mentioned you had a sister, is that right Hinata?”

“Yeah, her name’s Natsu, she’s younger than me.”

“Do you get along well? Or do you feel bothered by her at times?”

“Weeell, I’m probably the one who does the bothering, out of the two.”

“Cute,” his mom chuckled. “I’m sure the older she gets the more she’ll thank you for it, keeping an eye on her.”

“Maybe. You have a really nice house, Kageyama was telling me about how you decorate it yourself. That’s really cool.”

“Thank you. But didn’t he mention my dragging he and his father into it? I always have help from them, even if not willingly given.”

“I like the orange,” he said of the kitchen walls.

“That’s funny,” she said, glancing. “Tobio said once it reminds him of your—”

“Mom.”

They both looked at Kageyama, who had not made a sound up to this point.

“Do we have milk?”

She took a moment to answer.

“As if you have to ask that. Would you like some, Hinata?”

“No, no thank you.”

“Tea, coffee, water? Lemonade?”

“No, I’m okay.”

While Kageyama was pouring his milk, his mom moved to stir up her pots. When they had both turned back around, Hinata tried to trace some similarity in their faces. His scanning back and forth did not go unnoticed.

“I told you we don’t look alike,” Kageyama said.

“A—I—”

“No, Tobio doesn’t resemble either of his parents, something he’s very proud of.”

“Um, well, you’re pretty, and Kageyama’s—Girls at school say he is.” He could only catch her eyes for a moment as he smiled.

Her eyes grew and grinned, and her mouth opened in a silent gasp as she turned to her son. While her attention was diverted from Hinata, Kageyama took the opportunity to stomp on his foot.

“Kageyama Tobio, you’ve never told me this. And I’ve asked you all sorts of questions about that kind of thing.”

“He doesn’t tell me about it either.” Hinata smiled through a grimace. “I just hear them talking about him.”

“Well, your father’s going to want to have a talk with you when he gets back.”

Hinata was sorry for embarrassing him, even though the first had been a genuine accident. He darted around his brain for something to change the subject.

“Oo!”

Kageyama and his mother both flinched.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I was just thinking about school and remembered that Kageyama brought me the onigiri. Thank you very much for packing it for me.”

He bowed his head, which prevented him from seeing Kageyama’s terror-glazed eyes.

“An onigiri?” She was frowning. “I’m sure I didn’t put anything in Tobio’s lunch, I don’t think I know what you’re—”

Then she saw Kageyama’s frozen stare, and immediately understood. She turned to the stove to hide her smile.

“Oh, that’s right. Yes of course. You’re very welcome.”

“I liked it very much. And talking about food reminds me that I should go home now, because my mom will have dinner ready and wonder where I am.”

“You’re going so soon?” His mom turned back around. “You’re welcome to have dinner with us. Call your mother, and I’ll speak to her as well, to smooth it over.”

“No, I’ll just go home, it’s okay. Thank you for the offer, but it’s okay.”

“Tobio would like your company,” she said. Hinata actually laughed.

“It’s been almost six hours now, I’m sure that’s enough of my company for Kageyama.” He stood up. “Thank you very much for having me in, I really like talking to Kageyama’s family.”

He bowed.

“Thank you for stopping by, Hinata, it was nice to chat. You’re welcome back any time. We’ll make sure to have you when my husband’s here, too. Get home safely.”

“Yes, thank you! Bye Kageyama, see you tomorrow.”

After he had been gone a few moments, Kageyama’s mother went out to wave him off. Kageyama dropped his head onto the table. The longer the visit went on, the higher it had climbed on his list of biggest mistakes. He straightened up when he heard her coming back.

“He’s precious!”

Kageyama groaned at the ceiling. On her way by, she smacked the back of his head.

“ _You_ need to be more enthusiastic about him being here or he’s not going to come anymore!”

She turned the heat down on the stove.

“He’s so small for his age, but the cutest little thing. You think he’s cute, don’t you Tobio.”

“Don’t all parents have to say that?”

She stopped on her way to the sink and pinched his cheek. “Maybe about their own kids,” she said, ignoring the glare. “Though I never said that about you because I was required to, Tobio. You were very cute, and now you’re very handsome, and I mean that.”

He chugged down his milk and wiped his chin on his arm.

“So is Hinata-kun dating, or interested in that sort of thing?”

Kageyama paused, and glanced at her. The silence made her turn around, and she caught his eye.

“He’s in love with someone,” Kageyama said.

“Oh, really.”

“That’s what he says. Do you believe him?”

She frowned at him. “Hm?”

“Did he seem like he is?”

She scoffed and gave him a disapproving smile, before turning back to her pots.

“You think I can tell by looking at any old person whether they’re in love. I’ve only met Hinata twice. You’d be able to tell much better than me, if you paid attention. And anyway, if he told you and he’s your friend, that should be enough for you to believe him.”

“He’s my teammate,” he muttered.

“Tobio, he’s the first person you’ve brought to your house since third year of primary school.”

“I wonder why that is.”

She spun and slapped his thigh with her wooden spoon.

“Ah!”

“And it’ll be your precious setter hands next, so shape up.”

She returned to the sink behind him. Kageyama rested his head on the tabletop, and they fell into their usual activity, him silent and her humming while she worked.

But then Kageyama broke routine.

“What am I supposed to do?”

Her hands stilled.

“If I’m his teammate, and he’s freaking out about this person not liking him and it’s almost tournament time, what am I supposed to do about it?”

She turned and looked hard at his back. “He’s freaking out? Why?”

“I don’t know, never mind.”

She shook her head at her mistake, and tried again.

“Well. It’s his life, so he has the hard job. You just—listen, if he needs it, or distract him if he needs to be distracted, and if he asks for your advice, be honest. And, Tobio,” she turned back to the sink, and her voice sharpened, “You make sure he doesn’t get hurt. As his— _teammate_ , you need to be there if things don’t go well, so that he still feels like he has someone, and so he can keep his confidence and keep that sweet little smile on his sweet little face. Got that?”

He didn’t answer. But his scowl had something more in it than usual.


	14. Define: Good Enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter peeps!

They were now one week away from the Spring Tournament preliminaries, and Kageyama believed he was going to have gray hair by the time they got there. Every day he discovered a new way in which Hinata could be careless or clumsy. He had snapped at him three times today, and on top of that, things had been growing tense between them as Kageyama found himself seeing less and less of his partner, and making darker and darker assumptions as to why.

As they headed out after tonight’s practice, however, Hinata was neither provokingly bouncy nor irritatingly talkative. He didn’t make a sound until he had sat down on a bench, and the setter had copied him.

“Hey Kageyama, I need to talk to you about my crush again.”

“No.”

Hinata’s brow twisted. “Wh—”

“I’m sick of hearing about it, and you shouldn’t be talking about him if you’re trying to forget.”

“Ah. Um, okay. But, uh, I just—was gonna ask you if you’d help me a little bit, with the forgetting him thing…”

Kageyama looked over at his dejected shoulders.

“Oh. I’m—I’ll listen to you, then.”

Hinata looked up, with a face of frowning wonder.

“I didn’t know you were that annoyed by it. Why—Why did you listen all this time, if you didn’t want to hear?”

“I’m not—annoyed—”

“You just said. Why wouldn’t you tell me to shut up, that’s what you usually do.”

“Well I—Well why shouldn’t I be annoyed? I want you to be ready for the tournament, and you’re all distracted about this guy and it’s not good for you because it makes you feel stupid and inadequate. Isn’t that a good reason for me to be annoyed?”

Hinata frowned harder, and tilted his head at him.

“But you kept asking me those questions about it. You asked who it was and if they made me happy, and if they made me cry.” He looked down. “You shouldn’t act like you care if you don’t, Kageyama, it’s mean.”

“I care! I just said I don’t like what he’s doing to you, doesn’t that prove I care what happens to you? Geez you’re a pain. I’ve listened to you all this time and you’re telling me now I shouldn’t have done it?”

He shook his head violently. “No! I didn’t mean I didn’t appreciate it, I really do! But I just don’t like that you’d be annoyed and it’d be me that’s doing it, I don’t want you to have to—put up with me...”

“That’s my full time job.”

Hinata’s mouth dropped open. Then his eyes narrowed, and his lips pressed into a dramatic pout. He stood up.

“Never mind about the help, you’re giving it without me even asking so thanks a lot!”

He turned and started to stomp away. But Kageyama sprawled himself across the bench in time to catch his wrist.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re pissing me off!” He tried to pull free.

“Well if that’s helping you I take it back. Because I—I didn’t mean to do that.”

Kageyama lightened his grip, and Hinata took his chance to jerk away.

“Shut up! You did too! You don’t say how much of a pain they are to someone who thought he was your friend, unless you want to hurt his feelings!”

He tried again to leave, and again Kageyama grabbed his arm.

“I didn’t mean that. I said it because I was mad, because when you talk about him it makes me mad. Not that I hated listening to you, I didn’t not want to do that—”

Hinata was looking more softly now. Kageyama let go of him and sat up.

“Why does it make you mad?” Hinata said, one eyebrow twitching up.

“I don’t know. I mean, I don’t really—Well because you’re my best friend, and you talk about this other guy who you’re with all the time and happy about and that just makes me jealous of him, because I’m your best friend. I guess.”

“A…Oh.”

For a moment the redhead only stared. _Kageyama’s…jealous of someone? But it’s—He’s…jealous of himself…_

He covered his eyes. First he was frustrated by what a mess he’d made for himself. But things had gotten so painful lately that he couldn’t go long in this line of thought. It occurred to him that the idea was ridiculous, and when he realized it, he couldn’t stop the smile from creeping into his cheeks. Then he giggled.

His friend stiffened. He giggled again, and at the end it turned into a pair of genuine ‘ha ha’s, which was one too many for Kageyama. He stood up.

“Hey! If you’re such a good friend and know everything there is to know, shouldn’t you know by now that I expect you to take me seriously? You can let all the rest of your life become a joke if that’s how you want it, but I’m not a joke, and I’m not gonna let you laugh at me after I just told you something you were begging to hear!”

“A—I—No no! You’re not a joke! I wasn’t laughing at you, _you_ should know by now I’d never do that! And I wasn’t begging, I didn’t know you were gonna say something like that at all! If you ever had before, I would’ve—”

“It’s funny to see me chasing after somebody, right? It’s funny to you to see me pissed and wanting more than you’re gonna give me, just so you can hold it over my head because I suck at being a regular guy and you love seeing me do a shit job at something you’re good at. Is that what this whole year has been to you, all the hanging out and the talking, is that why you told me about your guy in the first place? Just to throw it all back in my face that I’m not a good friend because I can’t help you and can’t get smart enough to figure out something besides kicking his ass and taking you back?”

“No!” he stomped. “Kageyama I don’t even know what you’re—”

“If you think it’s a joke for someone to want to be around you and be the one who makes you happy and not the one who makes you cry and feel like shit, then that’s fine, you go ahead and do that, and it’s good to know I won’t have to care anymore.”

“You just shut up Kageyama, you make me cry _all the time_ because you’re so stupid! You’re an idiot!”

“You don’t say that to someone who thought he was your friend and who just admitted how much he actually cares about that!”

“Idiot!”

His scream pierced even after he had turned and run away. He launched himself onto his bike and took off. Kageyama threw his bag over his shoulder and stormed into the streets.

At the first turn, Hinata jerked his handlebars and felt the bike whip away to the side. He had no time to catch himself, and cried out as what felt like his entire left side grated against the pavement. Too angry to curse, he pulled his leg out from under the bike and stood up to kick it. Then he reached with his bloody hand to his burning face; his fingertips came away red.

The street was empty. He sat on the curb and hugged his knees to his chest, and began to cry bitterly.

Kageyama shoved the front door open and stepped into the hall.

“Finally,” a voice called.

“Your mom had a showing at six and she beat you by a whole hour.”

“I’ve had it simmering for twenty minutes.”

“Not eating,” he snapped. He took the stairs three at a time.

“Well you could have called, I haven’t eaten since breakfast and your father—”

A door slammed. His parents stared at each other.

“He’s upset,” his mom said.

“Too upset to eat?”

“He’s never too upset to eat, he hasn’t been that since—”

“Third year of middle school.”

Hinata was still crying on the curb, now in the complete dark of night. Each time he hiccupped, he growled at himself. _This is so stupid. I’m such a loser. I’ll just cry forever, it’s all I’m good at. I remember I cried the very first day Kageyama met me, right in front of him. So he’s used to it, that’s all he’s ever seen me do._

_He told me that day to become stronger. And I know I am! It’s been all this time and I know I am. But I just don’t feel like it._

_Guess that means I’m…not._

He screamed into his knees, sounding painfully like a years-younger version of himself.

Then he sat up straighter. And a little straighter. His eyebrows eased out of their painful scrunch, into a hard line. His thumbs came out from under his fingers, and locked into their proper place on the outside of the fists. He pushed his chin out, improving the pout of his bottom lip. His eyes were glowing.

 

Kageyama’s parents came to the closed door. His dad knocked.

“Tobio. Can we come in?”

No answer. His father spoke again.

“Are you all right? Did you get in trouble, or get hurt?”

No answer.

“Tobio…”

“Shoot,” his mom said. “I left the stove on.”

She went back down the stairs. His dad knocked again, more softly.

“Are you hurt? Answer me that.”

“No,” came a snarl.

“Did somebody else get hurt?”

Silence.

“Did—something happen with the team?”

His mom was cleaning the boil-over off the stove when she heard a knock. After a pause, she ignored it, assuming it came from upstairs.

But the knocking came again, and she realized it was too loud to be at Kageyama’s door. She went out to the front and opened it with a smile, which widened for a moment when she saw the redhead, then dropped completely from her face when she saw the blood. She gasped.

His dad came down the stairs.

“He says he’s not hurt, but that’s all I could get out of him, and I assume he won’t be coming out for—Oh my.”

Hinata stood squeezing the bottom of his shirt with both hands, and his shoulders trembled slightly as he looked from one to the other of Kageyama’s parents. He bowed so aggressively that it almost sent him staggering through the doorway.

“I’m sorry for the intrusion! I’m really very very sorry, but this is the only place I could think of that was close. I was wondering if I could—” He bowed again. “May I use your bathroom?”

They swept him upstairs in a rush of questions and sympathies.

“Tobio,” his mom called, “Your friend’s here and hurt.”

“Tobio, out here _now_.”

By the time he had made half sense of their words and opened the door, the three were in the bathroom down the hall. Kageyama caught a glimpse of orange hair, and red, and bolted.

He shoved between his parents and bent down to where Hinata sat on the tub. He gripped him by the shoulder.

“What the hell did you do, did you fall off your bike, what did you hurt, tell me you did not break anything, did you sprain an ankle or get a—”

“Tobio, for goodness sake, don’t _harass_ him.”

His mom was trying to loosen his fingers on Hinata’s shoulder, and his dad was gently pulling him back, but Kageyama only pressed forward and began analyzing the damage.

“He needs wash rags and antiseptic.”

“Yes, and _space_ ,” his dad said, rising to open up the medicine cabinet.

“Hinata-kun, how are you feeling?” His mom’s hand was overtop Kageyama’s on the boy’s shoulder. “Did you hit your head, and are you feeling dizzy at all.”

“No no, my head’s fine.” He looked down at his gashed knee. “I’m not sure how much I’m bleeding—”

“Did you try to catch yourself?” Kageyama said. “Is there pain in your wrist, or your elbow? Did you—”

“Tobio, we’ll assess in a minute. First, Hinata, call home and tell them you’re here, and that you’re being taken care of. Do you have your phone on you?”

“Uh—”

He looked down at his pocketless practice shorts. Kageyama was gone and back in a moment, and handed over his phone. Hinata faked him a small smile and dialed a number.

“Crap,” he murmured, “I think my mom’s working late tonight—Hi Dad. Um—No I’m okay. Well, I—I’m okay, I just had a little—just a little accident—No! No there was no cars, nothing like that, I was just riding and turned too fast and got scraped up so now I’m at Kageyama’s house and I’m just calling to tell you I’ll be a little late, ‘cause I’m gonna clean up the blood—No it’s not that much, it’s just my knee and—I’ll be fine, Dad, really I will.”

Kageyama’s mom was signaling him.

“Um, hey Dad, you could talk to my friend’s mom now, she’ll tell you I’m okay and that you don’t have to worry. You—want to? Okay, bye then.”

He handed off the phone, and Kageyama’s mom left the crowded bathroom. Hinata caught his friend’s eye for one moment and flinched away from the glare.

“What the hell were you doing,” he hissed, “A week away from games and you’re peddling around all ticked off and wiping out in shorts and a tshirt then walking all the way to my house on an injured leg when you could’ve just called—”

“Here you go, Hinata.” His dad handed him a damp cloth. “It’ll sting, but clean you up. And if you don’t mind, I can get to work on your leg.”

“Oh okay. Thank you.”

Kageyama’s dad knelt next to his son and began to wipe off the crusting blood. Soon however he switched to picking rocks out of the skin. Hinata was twisting his arm and attempting to see where he should clean; Kageyama gave a nasty eye roll, snatched the rag from him, and started to do it himself. He also returned to his questioning.

“Did you hurt anything seriously? Did you hit your head at all?”

“Um, just where it scraped right here on my face.”

“Nothing in your arm hurts?”

“Nope.”

“Did the bike land on you? Did you get your foot twisted up, or your ankle, or did you hit your knee hard?”

“Well my knee—The side of it hurts just a little, since that’s where I landed first.”

“If it’s only a little, I’m sure it’ll just bruise,” his dad said.

“Nothing here, or here?”

Kageyama felt from his hand up his wrist, like he had done at the movie theater. Hinata wasn’t in a blushing mood, and only shook his head and gave him an honest glance.

“Just a warning, Hinata, I’m about to douse you down here, because it’s pretty dirty.”

“Okay.”

The liquid washed over his knee and ran down his leg. One eye winced shut, and Kageyama watched him, almost aching from the fact that it had been a while since he saw his face this close.

“You’re still bleeding quite a bit down here, so we’re gonna wrap it up with some gauze.”

“Okay. Thank you very much.”

“Of course.”

He went back to the medicine cabinet. Meanwhile Kageyama noticed the hole in Hinata’s sleeve, and pulled it up to reveal more minor scrappage on his shoulder. He moved the wash cloth to this area, and Hinata watched, swinging his clean leg in front of him.

“Give us a little space, here, Tobio.”

The boy backed away as his father knelt again, pressed a gauze pad to Hinata’s main wound, and began to secure it with tape. Kageyama hovered at his shoulder.

“Not too tight or it’ll pinch when he moves.”

“Mhm.”

“His shin still has rocks.”

“Yes, but I didn’t want to scrub too hard on fresh wounds. When he showers it’ll get clean. It’ll be fine.”

Kageyama reached to take the tape from his dad’s hand. Then he grabbed a gauze pad, and began to fix up Hinata’s elbow in the same manner. His dad stepped back. He watched the strong, rock steady, normally quick fingers of the setter do gentle, tentative work.

“Sorry,” his mother called, coming in from the hall. “I love a willing talker, and Hinata’s father is—…”

Now Kageyama had one hand spread atop the fluffy hair, and with the other he wiped careful strokes over the scraped jaw and cheek.

“You sure your head didn’t hit?” he murmured.

Hinata shook it.

“Stay still.”

“Sorry.”

“I can’t even trust you to get home by yourself. You better not be doing this just to get on my nerves.”

“I don’t need to bleed to do that.” He stuck out his tongue.

“How long did you sit there pouting and being stubborn before you decided to come here?”

“Not that long.”

“Pf.”

His mom touched his dad’s shoulder, and the two of them backed quietly out of the bathroom.

“I can’t really put a band-aid on this, because I’ll just be sticking it on more scrapes,” Kageyama said. “But it’s not bleeding anymore anyway.”

“Okay.” Hinata leaned away until he was released. “I’m sorry for coming to your house without being invited. And I think I scared your parents, when they first saw me, so sorry about that. And I’m sorry your family had to worry about me and take care of me. See, I didn’t actually come for that. I could’ve made it home…”

“Yeah, so why’d you come?”

Kageyama stood up to put things away.

“Um, well, after I fell I wasn’t mad about—about our fight anymore…And I started being sad instead. So I decided to come and—see you again, if you would let me in. I left my bike at the school, so—if you’re not still really mad, could—Would you walk back…and we can—talk some more?”

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

 

It took twenty minutes to actually exit the house. First there were offers to spend the night, then to have a meal before leaving, then a quick snack. When Hinata mentioned his waiting father, Kageyama’s mom went on a tangent about the conversation they had had. Finally there were the well-wishes given for their upcoming games, and as much as he hated to pull them out during these, Kageyama did.

“Are you sure you’re not in much pain, Hinata-kun?” his mom said. “You can always stay here, if that will be more comfortable for you.”

“No no, I’m fine really, and I’ve been bleeding inside your clean house long enough,” he grinned. “Thank you very much.”

“It was our absolute pleasure. Come again very soon.”

“And again, good luck to you in the tournament. Go Karasuno! Caw caw!”

Kageyama, who had been tugging him through the doorway, whipped his head around, and his friend awed at the look he was giving his dad.

“ _What_.”

“Well isn’t that your war cry? For the crows? It makes sense.” He turned to his wife. “That makes sense, doesn’t it?”

Hinata was laughing and beaming.

“That is so cool! Kageyama we should start doing that, we should tell the team about it—”

“Move.” He edged him down the steps.

“Say hello to your father, Hinata.” His mom waved. “Be sure to tell him you weren’t a bother at all. Have him call me if he doesn’t believe you.”

“Get home safely, careful in the dark.”

“And walk him all the way, Tobio.”

“It was his idea to walk with him, I’m sure he’s going to take him all the way.”

“You know little things can set him off, he might change his mind halfway and we’d never know the difference. You tell us if Tobio abandons you, Hinata.”

Kageyama was pushing him so fast that all he could do was wave.

Both were grateful for the cool night air; Hinata’s peeled up skin was still hot, and color had been rising unpleasantly in Kageyama’s cheeks during his parents’ assault. But as his face paled, his insides were burning and twisting painfully. He was waiting for Hinata to say something first, but they walked in agonizing silence for two whole blocks. Finally he saw in the corner of his eye that the redhead was opening his mouth.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry,” the taller blurted. “I didn’t mean any of that, I know it was stupid and didn’t make any sense because I was just mad and not thinking about what I said.”

Hinata glanced up when he had stopped, and after a second they both looked away.

“I know you weren’t planning it all and I know you don’t think I’m a joke.”

“And I don’t think you’re an idiot,” Hinata said.

“That part’s obviously true, dumbass.”

“No, you’re not, Kageyama. I was just mad too. And I’m glad that you—I’m glad you don’t want me to feel stupid and cry and stuff.”

“Yeah I meant that part. I—I’m too proud.”

He was gazing ahead of them, when Hinata looked at him.

“That’s why when people laugh I can’t handle it at all. But I know you weren’t laughing at me. Sorry I’m like that.”

“I like your pride,” Hinata said to his shoes. “I wish I had it. Just so I could—be stronger…”

“Don’t wish that. Then you’d be a jealous asshole like me too.”

Hinata smiled.

“You already know I’m jealous, Kageyama. Remember when I pretended to be you and rejected that hot girl to keep you from noticing her? And I freaked out at Yoshi, and I’ve always bugged you about people asking you out just to make sure you hadn’t said yes.”

“I thought you were doing that as a good friend because you knew I wasn’t interested.”

“That’s what I wanted you to think, but that’s definitely not why I did it.”

“Well either way I don’t care.”

They walked.

“Hey, Hinata. I—actually do think you’re a pain in the ass. But everyone’s a pain in my ass, and I still like my teammates, and I like—you the most. So that part about it being my full time job, forget that, because it was bad and I didn’t mean it. You said I make you cry all the time, I can see why.”

“Ah—That was actually—I was exaggerating…You’re my best friend, so you make me happy way more than you do that.”

“Also don’t think I really was annoyed when you talked to me. I was, but it was my own problem, it wasn’t that you were doing anything to annoy me. I don’t want you to think that because like I said I’m jealous, and I don’t want you to talk to someone else instead.”

“Okay.”

They passed through the school entrance. Hinata stopped at the bench under the cherry tree, which glowed white in the moonlight. He sat in the grass and leaned back against the bench. Kageyama sat next to him.

Hinata’s face was angled away, and hidden in shadow, when he spoke.

“I brought you here to tell you who my crush is—But as we were walking, I realized that…it doesn’t matter anymore.”

Then the little redhead lay down on his side, pulling his hands to his chest, and began to cry. The warm tears slid silently into the grass. Kageyama was watching him, and frowned at the tiny chokes and gasps, but only when he noticed the boy’s quivering shoulders did he realize what was happening. His eyes widened.

“What’s wrong?”

A sharp hiccup.

“What is it?”

Hinata clenched his hands tighter.

“You’re hurt somewhere? That you didn’t tell me?”

“No,” he breathed.

“Are you still mad about the fight? You can be, I deserve it.”

“It’s not that.”

“Oh—Shit.” He brought his hand up rapidly to his head, as if to smack it, but paused, and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sorry. I get it now, I’m sorry I’m an idiot. Sorry, really, I should’ve known that. That it’s about him.”

Hinata squeezed out a fresh stream of tears.

“Did he hurt your feelings somehow?”

No answer.

“Did I—say something about him? That hurt your feelings?”

He was racking his brain, but no response was made to this either. He scowled hard at the curled back for a moment.

“Is it that you don’t wanna give up?”

The air squeezed from Hinata’s lungs in a painful huff. He whimpered, and began to cry harder. His body flinched with repeated choking, and he pressed his face deeper into the grass. Kageyama was watching the progression with chills in the pit of his stomach.

He had never seen this before. Hinata like this was his least favorite Hinata.

“D—Don’t cry…”

“I can’t tell him,” Hinata said. “And that means…I’m not good enough. For him.”

The setter’s heart sank.

“You were right about me being a wimp, you were right that I was stupid—”

“No, I didn’t mean—”

“I’m weak, I don’t—have—any guts. And that’s—the worst kind of person for him…”

Kageyama didn’t know what to do. He was scared. And because of it, he followed the first urge that came to him. He grabbed and pulled Hinata’s arm to sit him up, and before he knew it, was hugging him hard to his body.

He froze dead still. He had surprised himself as much as the other boy, who was huddled and quivering with shock. But Hinata had urges too, and within a second was gripping his friend’s shirt, pressing his face against him, and crying all the more.

His shaking jarred Kageyama, back into actively squeezing him.

“I promised,” Hinata wailed. “I told him I would be the best person for him, because I thought I could be, I thought I was telling the truth! I tried to make him smile when I talked to him, and I tried to give him everything he wanted for his birthday, and when someone else wanted him I told him he couldn’t have him, because I was already there and I was the best one to make him happy.”

Kageyama’s mind was turning, but frustratingly slow, as he tried to make sense of something he knew he should be able to understand.

“And I should’ve let him go with them, and now I _have_ to let him go, but I just feel crappy for trying to have him to myself when I didn’t deserve him, and why would he want to be with me anyway? He told me to tell him and I couldn’t do the one thing he told me to, I didn’t listen to him and I waited too long and now—I know—…I’m not brave enough, and not strong enough,” he gasped. “I’m not good enough for Kageyama.”

It took a moment for Hinata to realize. Then he froze; even his hiccupping chest was still. Slowly, he turned his head, brushing against Kageyama’s chest, and peeked up. His friend was stiff and staring at nothing. Hinata’s eyes went wide, and he panicked.

He pushed away, freeing himself from the loose arms, and scooted back. He sat there in the grass, leaning on his hands and breathing heavy, with an occasional hitch in the rhythm. His stomach ate itself as he waited for Kageyama to look at him.

He wasn’t good enough for Kageyama. He had nothing left to prove. But deep down, there was something about it that still mattered to him. He wanted his setter to look at him and see, just once, someone unafraid. Someone who had meant to be everything, and would have, if there was any way he could. Even though scrounging and expending the last of his dignity would be beyond painful, he knew he had to; it was the last thing he could give him.

So he sat up.

Despite the tears still dribbling down it, his face was set. When Kageyama stood up, he faltered, and when the boy walked toward him he lost all composure for a moment. Then he pulled together his squirming guts, refusing them escape. Kageyama had only taken a few steps, and still stood feet from him. He raised his eyes, and met Hinata’s.

“You’re not good enough for him?”

Hinata flinched.

“The guy you took all the way to Tokyo, just because it was his birthday? The guy you ate lunch with even though you had a hundred other people, people who would actually act like they were glad to have you there? The guy you took to—A—On a date…that he didn’t even realize was a date until just now? You’re not good enough for him?”

His voice rose.

“The guy you’ve stuck with for two years and given so much of your time to even though you don’t get _anything_ in return? The guy who never puts you above himself and never thinks about what the stuff he says is gonna do to your feelings? Who had you talking to him and smiling at him and putting up with him _every day_ , and didn’t appreciate any of that until he found out he had to share it! You’re not good enough for him?”

His shoulders relaxed.

“Seems like it’s the other way around.”

Hinata was clutching his shirt. When Kageyama stepped closer and crouched in front of him, he held his breath, staring.

“You like me.”

Hinata swallowed.

“You like me like me.”

He nodded, a little.

“Are you lying? Because by now you should hate me, for being the stupidest idiot alive, and for saying stuff that scared you off and stressing you out for months. But I don’t wanna think about that right now.”

“I’ll never hate you,” he whispered.

“Then will you go out with me?”

Hinata threw himself forward and grabbed his arm. “Yes I’ll go out with you, I want to very much! I’ll go out with you Kageyama!”

“K—Kay.”

He stood up. Hinata scrambled to his feet.

“So we’re gonna go out?” he said.

“Yeah.”

“Like for real?”

“You dumbass.”

As Hinata looked up at him, his hips began to wiggle with excitement. He laughed a little, then clasped his hands, unclasped them with a flourish, and laughed again.

“You like me Kageyama? Now I feel—so stupid but so happy! You should’ve said something earlier!”

Hinata couldn’t give a name to the look he got; he was so scared that he could barely manage the sheepish ‘hehe’.

“Just wait, Kageyama, I’m gonna try super super hard, and make you sooo happy you want to die!”

“Thanks.”

“All that stuff I said at training camp, I meant it! And I’m gonna prove it to you, I’ll be the best person, your favorite person, I’ll always work hard, even as hard as I do at volleyball. And how happy I am to date you, I’ll make you even happier than that!”

“You’ve never beaten me at anything before,” Kageyama said, “So get ready to be disappointed. No, I mean—to feel happy. No, to be disappointed that you feel—”

Hinata laughed. “I’m totally gonna win, ‘cause I have lots more practice and I’m way ahead of you!”

“Anyway, you should get home now. Don’t forget we have morning practice.”

“Yeah, I should go. It’s not super dark and creepy right now because the moon’s so shiny.”

Kageyama turned his back. “See you.”

“But—But wait! Um—”

The setter turned his head. Hinata looked down.

“Since—Since we’re going out now…you should say bye to me like—like a boyfriend, instead of like you always do.”

“What?”

Hinata shifted nervously, and his friend made that dangerous glare nearing an eye roll.

“Like how?” he said.

“Well you should—kiss me.”

Kageyama turned back toward him.

“You realize when I hugged you that was the first time I’ve ever done that, and now you’re gonna ask me to do something I don’t even know how to—”

He saw Hinata worrying, looking at the ground and twisting his hands in his shirt. Kageyama grabbed his arm, pulled him to the closest bench, and sat him down. Then he knelt in front of him, glancing at his face as he touched the back of the tough little calf. He lifted Hinata’s knee, and kissed it, on the scrapes just underneath his bandage.

He set his leg down and looked Hinata in the face. The redhead was staring blankly at the knee. So Kageyama grabbed the fingers of his left hand, pushing back to expose the palm, and kissed the roughly torn skin. Then he turned the arm over to kiss his scratched elbow.

Hinata was now staring at his arm. Kageyama watched him until he finally made eye contact.

“Is that good enough for you?”

Hinata’s mouth ‘o’ed. He looked at his lap, and slowly, softly smiled.

“Weeell, there’s one more place I got hurt…”

He brushed at his scraped cheek. Kageyama burned him with a look. But he leaned in anyway.

Hinata closed his eyes. Kageyama’s lips pressed a spot above his jaw, and fluttered there, caressing the skin for a moment. He pulled back, and eyed the redhead, who was spacing out again.

The next instant Hinata’s face scrunched, his mouth twisted, and his skin bloomed dark in the pale light. Kageyama backed away.

“Don’t be embarrassed, that’s what you asked for!”

“I’m not! But don’t look at me!”

Kageyama jerked him to his feet and gave him a push toward the bike.

“Go home now. You can shower and leave your wounds uncovered for tonight, but you need to wrap them up in the morning. If you can’t do it yourself I’ll help you before practice.”

He nodded, and began taking steps back.

“And don’t fall again, that’ll aggravate everything and hurt like hell, and you could get an infection or seriously hurt yourself this time.”

He nodded again, still walking backwards.

“You’re gonna trip, dumbass.”

Hinata smiled and turned around.

“Bye Kageyama! See you tomorrow!”

“See you.”

He watched him climb onto his bike and take off. He disappeared under the shadows of the trees, but then Kageyama saw the glowing eyes as Hinata turned his head. He rode out into a patch of moonlight, and there was a lightning flash of his beaming grin. His cheerful voice stopped Kageyama’s breath. But despite the new tightness, a warmth expanded in his chest, his shoulders pulled back, and he found his mouth very near a smile, at the words:

“I knew you’d make a good boyfriend!”


End file.
